CH 1-10

Summary

Amelia Davenport died alone at the bottom of an embankment. Her last phone call was to her husband Matthew, who she had hoped would come rescue her. But Matthew hung up on her. And as he did she heard her own children’s disparaging comments. Amelia Davenport had been a cut-throat business lawyer who climbed the ranks of the law firm Hoffman, Givens and Pratt, becoming the youngest Junior Partner in the firm’s history. She had also co-authored law textbooks used by high school and college students. When the twins were born, the Davenports insisted Amelia stay home to raise them. So she did. But life didn’t quite go the way Amelia planned and she found herself on the periphery more and more, an observer in her own family. Even Amelia had to wonder of her own family, if something were to happen to her, would they be sorry when she’s gone?

Prologue

The night I died, my husband of 25 years was watching fireworks with our children. I called for him. I called his phone, hoping he would come.

“I’m busy,” he said. “Stop your whining and just come join us!”

“Matthew,” I breathed out, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Is that Mom complaining that we’re leaving her out again?” I heard my son say. “God she’s annoying.”

“Dad, just hang up. She’s going to have her tantrum one way or the other. Why let it ruin the night?” I heard my daughter snark.

The phone dropped from my hand as my consciousness wavered and then finally collapsed.

Hours passed, and my family didn’t even notice that I had not only not arrived for the fireworks display but had also stopped calling or texting.

When the display ended and my family gathered their belongings, they noticed I wasn’t in the crowd.

“She’s still having a tantrum,” my daughter, Anna, said, rolling her eyes. “She’s probably at home sulking.”

“She’s just being petulant,” my son, Alex, said. “Because we didn’t wait for her to come.”

“I’ll deal with her when we get home,” Matthew, my supposed loving husband, said as he closed the trunk of his car once he’d stowed the picnic blankets and food I had carefully and lovingly packed for our family outing to watch the annual fireworks display our city put on for Founder’s Day.

The three of them drove home expecting me to be there waiting.

They were surprised when they got to our house and saw that none of the lights were on.

“Even if she goes to sleep before us, Mom always leaves a light on,” Alex said, frowning in confusion.

“She’s being childish,” Anna said. “She didn’t get her way because we asked her to go grab something and she wasn’t back when we were ready to go.”

And that was true.

Before we planned to leave, Anna and Alex asked for a specific drink we could only find at one store across town. They insisted they had to have the drink at the fireworks display, as it was their tradition. I had forgotten to buy the drink, so I had to go out and get it for them.

It’s not like they are incapable of driving. They both have licences and they each have their own cars. But my supposedly loving husband, with whom I had raised our two children, giving up my position at a law firm in the city to stay home with, argued that I had neglected to get it in all my preparations for the evening’s event. Therefore, I was responsible for rectifying it by going across town during rush hour to retrieve this precious drink.

And so, because I had devoted my life to the happiness of my husband and children, often to the sacrifice of my own happiness and comfort, I got into my car and headed out, asking only that they wait for my return before leaving for the fireworks.

I never made it to the store.

On the way, a terrible accident was on the highway ahead of me. I maneuvered around it but was blindsided by a truck that had decided to speed around the accident site and had hit my car, forcing it off the road and down an embankment. I lost consciousness as my car rolled to the bottom of the embankment and landed against a tree.

By the time I came around, the sun had set. My vision was blurry, and my left leg felt like it was on fire. The car’s roof had collapsed somewhat, and the car had come to rest against the tree, and I was still strapped into my seat. I heard nothing around me but the sound of traffic on the highway above. I didn’t even see any flashing lights of any emergency vehicles. Was it possible that not one driver had noticed my car get hit by that truck? Had the truck driver not reported that he’d hit a car and thrown it down the embankment?

With much difficulty and much pain, I very carefully undid my seatbelt, using my left leg to brace myself against the middle console. I pulled at the cracked sunroof and dragged my broken and bruised body through it, managing a couple of nice, deep gashes courtesy of the shattered glass.

Thankfully, my phone had been in my pocket while I was driving, so I tried to retrieve it once I got away from the car and lay on my back in the dirt disturbed by the rolling car.

Above my head, I could see that the fireworks display had begun. I didn’t know how much time had passed and how much of the display was left. I pressed Matthew’s contact on my phone.

“What do you want?” was how he answered when he picked up. “We waited until we couldn’t wait any longer. Where are you? It’s ten minutes back and forth and you never bothered to show up. You didn’t even come here to meet us. You know this display is important to the twins and I and you couldn’t even manage to get everything prepared correctly.”

I was trying to stay conscious as he berated me for something that was out of my control.

“You’ve disappointed the twins by conveniently forgetting their favourite drink, and then by being petulant and immature and not even bothering to come home in time to leave with us. Now the display is almost over and you still haven’t shown up,” he continued.

“Where is she?” I heard Anna ask.

“Who cares anymore?” Alex said. “Just tell her we’re busy and to meet us here or whatever. She’s probably mad we didn’t wait for her.”

“I’m busy,” Matthew said. “Stop your whining and just come join us.”

“Matthew,” I breathed out, my voice barely above a whisper. I was trying to get him to hear me. I was trying to get him to hear that my life was ebbing out of me. I didn’t know it, but one of the cuts on my legs had sliced a small cut into a femoral vein and nicked the artery. I was bleeding out but all I felt was cold and tired.

“Is that Mom complaining that we’re leaving her out again?” I heard my son say. “God she’s annoying.”

“Dad, just hang up. She’s going to have her tantrum one way or the other. Why let it ruin the night?” I heard my daughter snark.

My consciousness collapsed, and slowly, my life ebbed away. I died, alone, at the bottom of an embankment, unseen by the world above.

Chapter 1

“I can’t believe she’s being so childish,” Alex said as they walked into the dark house. “I mean, fine. Don’t show up to the fireworks. She made her point. But to make it look like we aren’t even welcome in our own home? So stupid.”

“What do you expect?” Anna said to her brother. “She’s immature and just playing one of her stupid games. I bet she’s sitting in the living room, just stewing. And I’ll also bet that no matter how upset she is, which is dumb, she’s still got our bedtime snack ready and waiting.”

Every night before the kids went to bed, I made them a snack. Something light, but filling and healthy. Some fruit and cheese and a cup of warm milk, sometimes hot chocolate, just to send them to sleep with full bellies and warm thoughts. Tonight, however, I hadn’t made their snack. I hadn’t warmed milk for them. I hadn’t come home because my now-dead body was at the bottom of the embankment.

Matthew turned on the foyer light as they entered the house.

“Amelia!” he shouted. “Stop this petty game! You couldn’t even turn on a light? How childish are you? If I had known I had married a child I wouldn’t have had to have children!”

The twins looked at their father.

“You know I don’t mean I didn’t want you to be born. I’m making a point that I don’t need to raise another child when I’ve raised the two of you already,” he explained. They smiled and nodded.

Alex and Anna were the apples of their father’s eye. They could do no wrong. When they were young and would fight over a toy, Matthew’s instinct was to blame me for not getting each their own toy, and then immediately would go to get the other twin an identical toy. This had ruined entirely the lesson I had been trying to teach them about learning to share with others. All they knew was that if they complained enough, their father would buy them what they wanted, while their mother was the mean one who kept all the fun away from them.

When Alex was close to failing his junior year of high school, Matthew blamed me for not tutoring him enough, or if I wasn’t smart enough to help him, then I should hire a tutor who was. Intelligence wasn’t my problem. I was quite capable of helping Alex with his homework. Whenever I tried to sit down with him, he would immediately stop listening, talk over me, and insist I didn’t know what I was talking about. He refused to listen to me and my explanations of the concepts in his junior law course. He told me I was stupid and knew nothing about the laws.

He didn’t notice that I had written the textbook his school used. It was under my maiden name, but that didn’t change the fact that that text was mine and I knew those laws inside and out. And Matthew never corrected either of the twins when they told him I was stupid.

Matthew and I had met in college when I was a freshman and pre-law. He was in a business program and some of my pre-law classes overlapped with his business law classes, seeing as us pre-law students would likely wind up working for and with some of the business students as legal representation in their businesses.

Our courtship had been one you’d only read about in fairy tales. The whole ‘swept me off my feet’ type of love. The ‘foot popping’ first kiss.

Matthew was handsome. Many of the girls in my class, and his, wanted to date him. I won’t lie. I did too. But I knew I was just one of many who was interested in Matthew Davenport.

I didn’t pursue him. I didn’t throw myself at his feet (not intentionally, anyway). I would say hello to him if our paths crossed on campus, outside of class, or at parties we both attended. I watched from afar as my classmates, and his, vied for his attention. I would smile to myself as I watched some of the tricks and tactics other girls tried to get his attention with. My friends and I often laughed together at some of the antics we had watched our peers put themselves through.

Matthew was a bit of a mystery. Everyone knew he came from a wealthy family. Everyone knew he was expected to take over his family’s business after he graduated. And Matthew was a serious student. He did, however, struggle with some of the law classes he had to take, and therefore my professor assigned me as his tutor. As the top student in the business law class, it only made sense.

“I don’t get why I have to learn all this when I can just hire you when you become a lawyer and you can deal with all this stuff!” He cried, exasperated, one night during a tutoring session where he was having trouble with two similar concepts with very different results.

“You need to know this because if you’re the one running the business, you need to know if the issue will be a detriment or an asset if it becomes a legal issue. This is the type of stuff you don’t want to come across in business. You need to be able to recognize the problem before you have to hire a lawyer.”

I explained the difference once again.

I tutored Matthew for the entire semester. In return, he often treated my roommates and I to dinner, replaced a couple of pieces of broken furniture and even bought us a new microwave when ours decided it no longer wanted to do its job.

We had never asked for any of it and even tried to decline the microwave.

“Honestly, it’s the least I can do. I passed my law final thanks to you, and if I hadn’t had you as a tutor, Amelia, I am one hundred percent convinced I would have flunked the whole class. So as a thank you, please accept the microwave,” he’d said.

It was a top of the line model that was well outside our price range. But we did accept it, graciously, and invited him over for a movie night where he got to witness the first use of the appliance as we made popcorn.

Matthew was sweet, and kind. And while I admit I had a crush on him, I thought he was out of my league. I was happy enough to consider him a friend.

Fast forward three years, Matthew and I graduated. He completed his studies Cum Laude and I completed my pre-law undergraduate degree Magna Cum Laude. I had law schools vying for my application. Scholarship offers and bursaries were pouring in. My roommates and Matthew all helped me decide where to attend law school.

At the end of the year, before we all had to move out of our dorms or apartments, Matthew and his roommates threw a huge end of year bash off campus. Of course he invited my roommates and me.

“I can’t not invite the woman who made business law less of a hellscape!” He said as he handed me the flyer for the party. It was being held in a rather exclusive bar and rumor had it that Matthew had rented out the entire place just for the party. I couldn’t say no. I wouldn’t have ever been able to get into this bar otherwise.

The night of the party, my roommates and I helped each other get ready. We wanted to look our best though we all came from relatively humble backgrounds. My parents were divorced with my father off in some foreign country with his mistress and my mother making an honest living as a nurse in our local hospital. I had gotten into university on scholarships and had worked as a tutor for some extra cash. My mother still had my brother and sister to support, so I did my best to be as little of a financial burden as possible. Even still, she sent me some money occasionally, just to remind me that she was still in my corner. She told me all the time how proud she was of me, and I thanked her every time for the money she sent, usually trying to save it to either take her out to dinner when I graduated, or to use for something special for all four of us when I did.

Emma, Roberta, Callie, my roommates, and I shared a rideshare to the party. Even the driver was impressed when we pulled up.

“Nice place,” he whistled. “So I’ve heard. How’d you get so lucky to get an invite in here?”

“A friend,” I said, sliding out of the car. We thanked the driver and headed to the door.

“Invite?” The bouncer at the door asked.

“Invite? We were only given a flyer. And it didn’t say anything about needing to bring it,” I said to the large man at the door.

“The flyer was the invite. Everyone knows to bring the flyer. If you don’t have it, I can’t let you in. University class only.”

“We’re from the university!” We protested, pulling out our student ID cards.

“You could have had those made at any copy place,” the bouncer said, unimpressed.

I blew out a breath in frustration.

“Danny, they’re fine,” a voice said. “They’re with me.”

I looked up and there was our knight in shining… Armani? Matthew Davenport in a well tailored suit looking every bit the import/export magnate he was destined to be.

“Apologies, Mr. Davenport,” the bouncer said, stepping back. “They didn’t have their flyer.”

“No worries, good man,” Matthew smiled. “You were just doing your job. I appreciate that. We don’t want anyone uninvited. But these four are definitely invited. Come on, ladies. Come in.”

Matthew grinned at us, the bouncer smiled and we thanked them both as we stepped into the bar.

The place was amazing. The interior looked like we had walked into a bar carved out of a glacier. Glass and lights created the illusion of ice and snow. Everything was bathed in blue light, and everything in the bar—all the tables, counters, chairs, sofas, and furniture—was all white, creating the illusion of a bar literally frozen in ice. It was magnificent.

“It’s an open bar, but be mindful, hmm?” Matthew said over the music. I felt his hand lightly on my back. He leaned close to me.

“You clean up quite nicely,” he whispered in my ear. I blushed. Throughout school I had dressed in comfortable, casual clothes, preferring loose sweats and jeans over suits, dress pants or skirts. I was there to learn, not for a fashion show.

“As do you, Mr. Davenport,” I smiled. Matthew had dressed more casually in school, too. But usually in jeans or slacks, sneakers or loafers and t-shirts or button down shirts. Rarely in shorts or sweats unless he was playing football in the quad with his friends.

“Come to the bar. Let me get you a drink. I’ve got a signature cocktail,” he said, guiding me towards the glass topped ‘ice cube’ in the middle of the large space.

Matthew indicated to the bartender that he wanted two of his cocktails and a minute later, a blue drink in a martini glass was in front of me.

“To graduation and what lies beyond,” Matthew said, his smile making it all the way up to his eyes.

“To the future,” I responded.

We clinked glasses and I took a sip of the blue drink.

It was sweet and delicious. It tasted of raspberries and lemon.

“This is good. What’s it called?”

“The Amelia,” he said, looking me straight in the eyes over the rim of his glass.

I stared at him. He’d named the drink after me?

Matthew led me to a couch in the corner, indicating to the bartender to send over two more in a couple of minutes. He sat me down and sat beside me, putting his arm around my shoulders.

“You intrigue me,” he said to me.

“How so?” I asked.

“I know you have a crush on me, my buddy Tyler told me,” he smiled at me. I felt my cheeks redden. Tyler was Emma’s boyfriend, and no doubt she’d told him.

“But unlike every other girl in this school, you never put on an act. You never act like you’re just here to get your MRS,” he said. I frowned at him.

“MRS?” I asked, unsure what degree that was.

“Mrs. Davenport. Some – a lot – of girls come to university looking for a husband, not a career. And a lot of the girls in our classes, well, you’re not blind and you’re not stupid. You’ve seen how girls act around me. I don’t want to come across as narcissistic or selfish. I know I’m not ugly. I know I’m kinda good-looking. I’m lucky in that way, I guess. But the way girls around here throw themselves at people like me. They want my money. My family’s money, our status, the things that people in my position are not entitled to, exactly. That sounds gross, but the perks, I guess, of having money.

“I’m not naive, Amelia. I know that in terms of birth, I won a lottery somehow. My parents have done well for themselves, and my grandparents have done well for themselves. I know I’m extremely lucky. I know I grew up in lucky circumstances.”

“What does any of that have to do with me?” I asked.

“You don’t seem to care one way or the other whether I even look in your direction. And yet, when you were asked to tutor me, you didn’t say no,” he said.

“Why would I? A fellow student needed help, and I was able to help. So I did,” I said.

“And yet, in all that time together, you never once made a move. You stuck to the topics at hand and got me through my exams, and not once did you even hint at, well, anything,” he said.

“I’m not sure if you’re trying to compliment me or not,” I frowned.

My drink was empty, and the bartender had come by with our refills. I took a sip of my second drink.

“Compliment. Entirely. I promise,” Matthew said, watching me over his own glass. I looked back at him, not letting him try to intimidate me.

“So, after graduation, I assume you’re going to law school,” Matthew said, changing the subject.

“Of course,” I said. What was the point of being pre-law if I wasn’t actually going to go ahead and get a law degree?

“Have you chosen which school yet?” he asked, interested.

“I’m deciding between two. I have another two weeks before I have to put in my final decision,” I said.

“What’s the criteria you’re trying to decide on?” he asked.

“Distance, how much scholarship they’re offering and whether they have the law program I want,” I replied..

“Why is distance a factor?” Matthew asked.

“I don’t want to be too far from home,” I replied. “My mom is a single mom and she still has my younger brother and sister at home. I want to be able to go back home and visit, help her out a little bit, and be available if needed.”

“Ah. What about your dad? How old are your brother and sister?” Matthew asked.

“My dad left us when I was sixteen. He’s off in some other country with his whore,” I said, and then slapped my hand over my mouth. Matthew laughed heartily.

“I love an honest woman,” he said, joy in his eyes. “So, how old are your siblings?”

“Kieran is fourteen and Alecia is twelve,” I said.

“Fun. My brother is twenty, just started university and, according to my father, not doing much. He’s basically the spare. My dad planned on handing the business to me, and I’ve been groomed my whole life to take it over. My brother is a bit more of a free spirit and doesn’t really have any direction. Which is too bad, because he’s really smart,” Matthew said.

I had no response to that. My brother and sister were also pretty smart, but with Kieran just starting high school and Alecia finishing middle school, I didn’t have anything with which to compare.

I spent the remainder of the night with Matthew close by. When I went to dance, he joined us. When I went to relax, he took me to his VIP spot and we sat with my roommates and some of his friends.

It wasn’t until the night’s end that I ‘threw myself’ at his feet. And I blame the alcohol, one hundred percent.

I had had at least four of Matthew’s potent signature cocktails, and I hadn’t had much to eat before coming out. Returning to the VIP area, I tripped up the steps and landed on the floor at Matthew’s feet.

“Now you throw yourself at me,” he laughed as he helped me get up.

“I think now is probably a good time for me to go home,” I slurred.

Matthew helped Emma, Roberta, and Callie get me out of the bar and into a car.

“Make sure she drinks some water and maybe give her an Advil before she goes to bed,” Matthew told my roommates. I grinned sloppily up at him.

“Thanks, Mr. Davenport, for the wonderful evening,” I said, drunkenly. “I just hope I remember it.”

Matthew chuckled as he closed the door and the car drove off.

The following morning, I did not feel well at all. My head was pounding, and my tongue felt like I had spent the night licking the lint trap in the dryer. I groaned as the sunlight streamed into my room.

I dragged my sorry butt out of bed, forced myself into a shower and, bleary eyed, wandered into the kitchen. Emma handed me a cup of coffee.

“Had fun last night, did you,” she smirked at me. I groaned back.

The doorbell rang just then, which did no wonders for my head. I sat at our kitchen table and put my head in my arms.

“Amelia?” Emma said, her voice confused and delighted. I looked up, and Matthew was standing in our doorway, a grin on his face and several take-out bags in his hands.

“Good morning,” he said—way too cheerfully for this time of day, too cheerful for my headache.

“Hi,” I groaned.

“I suspected you might be feeling a little under the weather this morning,” he smiled, holding up the bags. “So I brought my tried, tested and true hangover cure.”

I looked at the bags, oil and grease adorning them.

“Well, I suppose if I have a heart attack from all the grease, I won’t have to worry about the hangover,” I muttered. Matthew laughed.

I had to admit, though, the greasy food actually did make me feel better.

A few weeks later, we were all heading our separate ways, and I really didn’t give Matthew much thought. I returned home for the summer, having chosen which school to attend in the fall.

I worked a summer job at our local library while my siblings enjoyed their summer off and Mom worked as hard as ever.

At the end of August, I left home again for a law school only three hours away. Far enough to need to stay on or around campus, close enough to be home in an emergency, or when I wanted to be.

I focused solely on my studies, not much on the world beyond law school.

Occasionally, I’d hear about Matthew and the Davenport’s businesses and successes. But for the most part, it was information on the periphery. My world consisted primarily of law classes, studying, and ensuring Mom was okay.

After graduation, I worked incredibly hard at my articling job, hoping to be hired by the top law firm in the city. I had been snatched up by Hoffman, Givens, and Pratt as a junior law clerk after graduation and was encouraged to stay. I wanted to prove my worth. And I did—to the point that my professors still called me, and one asked me to co-write the law textbook my future son would tell me I knew nothing about.

Chapter 2

I had been so focused on my studies and my reputation in the legal circles I was in that it was a shock to me when Matthew Davenport walked into my office a month after I became a Junior Partner.

“Look at you, Amelia,” he smiled, sitting in the chair across from me.

“Matthew!” I exclaimed. “Hi! Please don’t think me rude, but I have a new client in a couple of minutes. I don’t want to push you out, because it really is great to see you, but I have to meet with this client.”

“Have you not seen who your client is?” He asked, which was an odd question.

“I haven’t. All my calendar says is “D – consultation,” I said.

Matthew grinned at me.

“D,” he said. “Davenport. And I did come for a consultation.”

I frowned at him.

“You? You’re my new client?” I was confused. “Don’t you have your own legal team?”

“I do. I’m here on… more of a personal matter,” he said.

I sighed.

“Matthew, I specialize in business law, not personal law, not family law,” I said. “I’m sorry if you’ve wasted your time.”

“I know what law you practice, Amelia. I’ve been following your career,” he grinned. “You’ve done well for yourself.”

“Thank you,” I said. “But now I’m confused. I have you down for a consultation but you have a legal department already. Why are you coming here for my services?”

“I haven’t. Not exactly,” he said cryptically. “I was hoping to take you to lunch. That’s why I booked the 11 am slot. Your assistant said you usually take your lunch around noon. This way I get two hours of your time.”

“You made a consultation appointment, knowing my fees, to have a lunch partner?” I asked.

“I’d like to think of it more as a date, but yes,” Matthew smiled.

I surveyed him as I sat across from him. There was nothing to indicate he was anything but sincere. I glanced at his left hand and saw no ring. What the heck? Lunch with an old classmate? Why not?

“Alright. But I do have to be back by one. I have a deposition,” I said.

That lunch date turned into an invite for dinner, which turned into a weekend away with Matthew, and by then, we were an official couple.

I brought Matthew home to meet my mother and my siblings. Mom was all over him the minute we walked in. If she’d been 20 years younger, I’m sure she would have tried to steal him from me. My sister also thought he was ‘gorgeous’.

My brother wasn’t as impressed, but he was pleasant enough. My brother thought he had to take on the “dad” role and make sure the guys I dated were up to his standards. I never listened to him really. But it was sweet.

Matthew and I dated for a year before he proposed to me, in Paris, under the Eiffel Tower. I know, cliche. But it was sweet and romantic, and of course, I said yes.

We were married a year later. His parents seemed less than thrilled when they met me. We had gone to their home for dinner, so I could meet his parents and announce our engagement.

Matthew talked me up, though, telling them how I’d worked my way through college and was the youngest Junior Partner ever at Hoffman, Givens and Pratt.

“But who are her family?” His mother asked, looking at me over her glass of wine. “Are they anyone we know?”

“Mom, don’t be so old fashioned,” Matthew said. “Amelia has worked really hard to get where she is and help her mom support her brother and sister.”

“Her single mother?” Mrs. Davenport asked, her voice thick with judgment.

“My dad left when I was young,” I explained. “My mom worked hard to make sure we didn’t have to struggle much. I went to college and law school on scholarships.”

“So, on charity,” Mrs. Davenport spat.

“Mother!” Matthew said. “Scholarships are not charity! Amelia had amazing grades and academic scholarships. If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t have passed my business law class.”

Matthew’s father barely acknowledged my presence and spent the whole evening reading a financial paper. I don’t really think he was reading it because I don’t recall him actually turning any pages.

Dinner was uncomfortable and quiet. Matthew’s father asked exactly two questions. And neither of them was directed at me. Both were business questions for Matthew.

“My parents are stuffed shirts and very old school. If they’d had their way, they’d have me marrying their friend’s daughter, Seline. We grew up together, and our moms would always talk about how one day we’d be married and join our families and blah blah,” he said, as we left his parents’ house, and I could no longer hide my embarrassment and shame.

His parents had made me feel so small and unaccomplished. But I had worked hard for what I had achieved. If his parents couldn’t see it, that said more about them than me, right?

Matthew tried to make me feel better, but I wanted to be accepted by his parents, too. I didn’t want a problematic relationship with my in-laws. I was close with my mom and hoped to forge a relationship with Matthew’s parents, too. But that seemed less likely with just that first meeting. I knew I would have my work cut out for me trying to ingratiate myself with Matthew’s parents.

Matthew and I had both determined that we would cover our wedding costs together. That way, my mom didn’t have to feel like she couldn’t provide a wedding for her daughter, and Matthew agreed that his parents would hold that over my mother’s head, and therefore mine.

I was buried in wedding planning when I first met Seline, Matthew’s family friend. She seemed alright. Our wedding was six months away, and Seline suddenly reappeared. According to Matthew, she had been studying abroad. We were at Matthew’s parents’ house for dinner when she just walked in.

“Seline!” Matthew said as she came into the parlour where we were having drinks. Shocked, Matthew stood up and went over to her, giving her a hug and an air kiss on her cheek.

“Hi Matty,” she smiled. “It’s been a while.”

“It has,” he agreed, retaking his seat beside me. “I thought you were in England.”

“I was,” she said, accepting a drink from my smiling soon-to-be mother-in-law. “But I thought I might try for an opportunity here, in the States.”

She didn’t take her eyes off Matthew the entire time she spoke. She didn’t even glance over at me.

“Seline, this is my fiancée, Amelia,” he introduced me.

“Pleasure,” she said dismissively and barely glancing over at me.

“Nice to meet you, too,” I said, extending my hand. She looked at it as though I had placed it into a mud puddle first. I retracted my handshake.

“Fiancée, hmm?” Seline said. “Remember when we were kids and our moms would talk about us getting married and joining our two families?’

Matthew took a sip of his drink and didn’t reply.

“Seline is a top-notch jewelry designer in London,” Mrs. Davenport said. “She’s won several awards for her designs and has pieces in all the big retailers. Some of her pieces are so exclusive, you have to set up an appointment just to see them.”

“What is it you do, Amber?” Seline said to me.

“It’s Amelia,” I said. “I’m a Junior Partner at Hoffman, Givens and Pratt.”

“Well, that’s nothing to squawk at. How did you get such a position at your age? You’re still pretty young, right? I’m guessing you’re about mine and Matthew’s age. And you’re pretty.”

A deaf person would have heard what she was implying. I choked on my wine.

“Seline!” Matthew said, a warning tone beneath his words.

“What? I’m just stating the obvious. Your fiancée is pretty,” Seline said, feigning innocence. “And made Junior Partner so young.”

“I don’t like what you’re implying,” Matthew growled.

“Implying? I’m not implying anything. I’m sure Amy is good at her job.”

“Amelia,” I said through clenched teeth.

“Amy, Amelia. It’s not that different,” Seline said in an offhanded way. I could feel my blood boiling.

“Now now, Amelia,” Mrs. Davenport said in a sweet tone that put my teeth on edge. “Seline didn’t mean anything by it. She’s never been very good with names.”

Even I could hear the ‘of people who don’t matter’ that was left unspoken. I sighed internally. She’s just trying to rile me up, I thought to myself. It’s a test. Don’t rise to the bait.

“So,” Seline said, sitting back on the sofa she’d claimed. “Where did you two all meet, anyway?”

“We met in college, Seline,” Matthew said. “We had a few classes together and Amelia was my tutor in my law class. If it wasn’t for her, I probably wouldn’t have passed that class at all.”

“Brains and beauty,” she said coolly. “I guess we do know how you made Junior Partner so quickly.”

I felt Matthew’s hand tighten around mine. I looked at him, and he winked at me as if to say that he knew it was his mother testing us, me more than him, and not to rise to the bait.

“Shall we move to the dining room?” Mrs. Davenport said. “Seline, of course you’re joining us for dinner.”

It wasn’t a question.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Dinners at the Davenports are part of my core memories,” she smiled at Mrs Davenport.

In the dining room, Seline made a show of sitting on Matthew’s other side as he guided me to a seat. He pulled out my chair, and Seline cleared her throat as I sat.

“Be a gentleman, Matthew,” Mrs. Davenport said. “Pull out the chair for Seline, too.”

Matthew glanced at me and gave me a secret eye roll. But he moved over to Seline’s chair and pulled it out for her.

She touched his arm as she sat.

“Thank you, Matthew. Always the gentleman, aren’t you?” she smiled. “Just like when we were kids, and you would always make sure my chair was pulled out.”

Just breathe, Amelia, I thought to myself.

Somehow, we made it through that dinner without one of us losing it.

“I’m so sorry, Amelia,” Matthew said as we drove home from his parents’. “I had no idea Seline was back in the country, let alone that my mother invited her for dinner.”

“You know she did that on purpose, right? You realize she doesn’t like me and she wants to break us up,” I said.

“Don’t be jealous,” Matthew said, taking my hand and kissing my knuckles. “Seline and I grew up together. It’s not strange that if she’s back in the country, my parents would invite her over for dinner, and it wouldn’t make sense to invite her alone. Mom only invited her because we’d be there, and we’re all the same age. Don’t overthink it. Seline and I are childhood friends, and that’s it.”

Matthew may believe that, but it was painfully obvious that his mother didn’t.

Seline showed up multiple times when we were at Matthew’s parents’ place. His mother always made a point of mentioning Seline whenever we visited. Despite his protestations, Mrs. Davenport never stopped talking about Seline.

I knew more about Seline than I did about my mother-in-law-to-be.

And every time we left, though I felt increasingly unsettled about each interaction, Matthew stated there was nothing between him and Seline.

“But don’t you see your mother trying to push her between us? That she’s hoping you’ll choose her over me?” I asked.

“She might be trying, but I’m not listening,” he smiled at me. “I proposed to you, Amelia. I want to marry you. My mom could bring Seline into our bedroom stark naked and I still would only have eyes for you.”

How I wished I could believe that.

Despite her attempted sabotage of our relationship, the wedding went on. Mrs. Davenport played her role of proud mother of the groom well. She was engaging and pleasant on our wedding day, and friendly to me if she had to be in my presence around the other guests. But in private, she was cold, calculating, and constantly comparing me to Seline.

Seline’s dress would have looked nicer. Seline would have chosen different flowers and colour themes. Seline wouldn’t have chosen this food or that food. It’s all I heard the entire time the wedding was being planned and every time she had a chance to make a dig at me at the wedding.

Matthew stayed by my side throughout the whole reception, and squeezed my hand encouragingly as we met with colleagues of his father’s, friends of Matthew’s family, and Matthew’s personal friends. In comparison, my side was so much smaller. A handful of relatives, my mom, and siblings. We didn’t even bother sending my father an invitation, and I was walked down the aisle by my brother.

I was, of course, unsurprised that Seline was invited to the wedding. Her parents were invited, and of course, they’d invite the whole family. Matthew did say they had been friends throughout childhood, so I shouldn’t have been surprised to see her in the receiving line. But that didn’t mean I had to like it. I reminded myself to stay pleasant. To let everything go and just be welcoming.

“Congratulations, Matthew,” she said as she came up to us. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him close to her. “I hope you’ll be very happy with Aurora.”

I frowned.

“Amelia and I will be very happy,” Matthew said, dismissively. “Thank you.”

Seline then turned to me and plastered on the widest, fakest smile I had ever seen.

“Bold choice of colours,” Seline said to me. “Not many people can get away with teal and purple. But then, most people wouldn’t try.”

“Seline,” Matthew said, his tone full of warning.

“What?” she asked innocently. “I said it was a bold choice that most people wouldn’t think of.”

“Keep your comments to yourself,” Matthew said through his teeth.

“You’re overthinking, Matthew. I’m sure Amanda and I will be the best of friends,” she smiled, pulling me into a hug.

“Don’t think you can compete, street rat,” she whispered to me. “I’ve known Matthew a long time, and he deserves way better than you.”

I had nothing to say to that. I just stared at her smirking face as she pulled away from me.

“No thank you?” she asked me as I tried to process what had just happened. “I wish you and your groom well, and you don’t even say thank you?”

“Sorry,” I said, as though I’d been momentarily distracted. “Uh, thank you for your words.”

Matthew frowned as he looked between us.

I waved it off as nothing of consequence and returned to greeting our guests and enjoying the night.

After the wedding and the reception, Matthew and I left on our honeymoon. A month travelling through Europe, staying on the Amalfi Coast, touring Italy, France, England and Switzerland, and then returning to our own home.

We got back into the swing of things, with me back at the law firm where I was quickly gaining a reputation that was pushing me closer to a full partnership and Matthew taking over many of the duties his father was responsible for at the Davenport Group. His father was planning on an early retirement now that Matthew was settled, married and ready to take over.

Matthew’s mother’s attitude did not change one iota. In fact, she seemed to ramp up her game of getting Seline between Matthew and me.

She appeared everywhere. If Matthew’s mother wanted something from Matthew, she sent Seline to our house to retrieve it. And Seline made a point of making every visit to our home as uncomfortable for me as possible. She would look around at the decor and comment off-hand about colours, style, or function. It didn’t matter if Matthew had chosen the item she commented about; she made sure to make every encounter uncomfortable.

I just about lost my mind when I came home from work one evening after a tense meeting with some shareholders from the company I was representing, to find Seline cozied up on my sofa.

“What are you doing here?” I asked her as I put my briefcase down and hung up my coat. I tried to make it sound as though I were pleasantly surprised, but even Seline knew I was not happy to see her.

“Oh, Rachel gave me a key. She asked me to pick something up for her, and so I came to look for it. I couldn’t find it, so I figured I’d wait for Matthew to get home and see if he could help me locate it,” She said.

“What in the world could she need from our house that you had the audacity to come and let yourself in knowing neither of us would be home?”

“You don’t need to worry about it. It’s just something the Davenports asked me to retrieve,” she said, not moving from her seat on my sofa.

“Don’t you think it’s inappropriate to let yourself into someone else’s home when you haven’t been invited?”

“Amelia, darling, Matthew and I are practically brother and sister. You wouldn’t be upset if your sister in law let herself into your house, would you? It’s not like you have a lot of things people would want to steal anyway,” she said, looking distastefully at her surroundings.

“Yes, I would be upset if Matthew had a sister and she just came into our house while neither of us was here. This is out of line, Seline. Even you must realize that,” I said, fuming.

“Please, Amelia. You have nothing to worry about. Once Matthew gets home and is able to find what I was looking for, I’ll be out of your hair,” Seline said with false sweetness.

I went into the kitchen without another word to Seline. I had hoped she would stay in the living room, sitting on my sofa like a diva. But no. She decided she would follow me into the kitchen.

“Can I help you with something else, Seline?” I asked as I put water in the kettle and began to boil it. I always ended my work day with tea once I got home. And I didn’t trust Seline any further than I could throw her, so there was no way I was going upstairs to change and leave her alone for another minute.

“No, I just thought we could talk. You know, girl to girl,” she smiled. The smile not only didn’t reach her eyes, but also looked more menacing than friendly.

“I’m not sure that there’s much we have to say to one another,” I said, pouring hot water into my mug.

“Now, now, Amelia,” she started.

“So now you remember my name?” I said, leaning against the counter away from Seline, who was standing at the kitchen island.

“Don’t be so sensitive. I’m not good with names at the best of times,” she waved me off. “Aren’t you going to offer me a cup of tea?”

“No,” I said simply. “I hadn’t planned on it. You let yourself into our home uninvited and you still expect me to be a hostess? Sorry, Seline, but I don’t cater to people who don’t know their boundaries.”

Just then, I heard the front door open and Matthew’s joyful, but tired-sounding, voice filtered through to the kitchen.

“Amelia? Honey?”

Seline grabbed my mug from my hand and threw it to the ground, breaking it and splashing herself with hot water.

“Amelia!” she shrieked. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to intrude! But you didn’t have to throw your tea at me!”

I stood against the counter, still stunned by what had just happened, my hands still wrapped around the now non-existent mug.

Matthew came running into the kitchen.

“Seline! Amelia! What happened?”

“Matthew!” Seline sobbed. “Your mom asked me to come get something, but I couldn’t find it. She gave me a key, and told me you wouldn’t mind. But Amelia apparently did, because she threw her hot tea at me!”

I looked at her and then at Matthew. I could not believe the audacity of this woman.

“Amelia?” Matthew looked at me. “Why would you throw hot tea on Seline?”

“Seriously Matthew?” I looked at him. “You honestly believe that I would make myself a cup of tea and then throw it on Seline’s feet?”

“I don’t know, but she’s the one with hot water on her skin and burns, and you’re just standing there!”

Matthew grabbed Seline, picked her up and left the kitchen.

“I’m taking her to get her burns checked. We’ll talk when I get home,” Matthew frowned at me. I glared back at him.

The two of them left, leaving me to clean up Seline’s attempt at sabotage. I sighed as I wiped up the tea and cleaned the broken mug.

Since Matthew would be gone for a while, I just heated some leftovers from the night before and went upstairs to change after I’d eaten and cleaned up.

I got everything ready for the morning, went into our bedroom, and slept.

I heard Matthew come home sometime in the late hours and felt the bed shift as he lay down. I kept my back to him and my eyes closed, hoping he’d think I was asleep.

“Amelia?” He said quietly. I didn’t move. I kept my breathing even. He sighed and turned over. Whatever he had to say, he could wait until morning.

Chapter 3

When I woke up in the morning, Matthew wasn’t in bed. I didn’t hear him in the bathroom and wasn’t sure if he was even home. I would have hoped he would have at least waited for me to wake up to discuss what happened last night. So I could tell him what had actually happened.

I busied myself getting ready for work, then went downstairs to make myself a coffee to take into the office.

I was on the stairs when I heard voices – plural – from the kitchen. Frowning, I went to investigate.

Seline was standing beside Matthew by the stove, literally hanging off of him. Matthew was cooking something, and Seline was leaning on him and watching. I stood in silence, watching the two of them. Neither of them even noticed I’d come into the kitchen.

I went to the coffee machine, pulled down my travel mug and let the cabinet slam shut. They both jumped and turned around. A look of guilt crossed Matthew’s features.

“Good morning,” he tried to salvage his initial reaction. “I didn’t want to wake you up.”

I looked between Matthew and Seline.

“This is cozy,” I said, crossing my arms.

“It was late by the time we finished at the hospital. Seline is fine, thanks for asking,” Matthew frowned. Seline just smiled at me. “And she was sore. So I brought her here to sleep last night. It just didn’t make sense to have her go home by herself when she was in pain.”

“No,” I said, lacing my tone with sweetness and sarcasm. “I wouldn’t expect a full grown adult to be able to manage taking a Tylenol all by themselves.”

“It’s because of you she was injured in the first place,” Matthew frowned. “The least you could do is apologize and not make a big deal out of this.”

I scoffed. Apologize? For what? She poured the tea on herself.

Matthew’s frown deepened.

“It’s fine, Matty,” Seline said, her tone full of saccharine. “It was an accident. I surprised Amber by being here when she got home.”

I balled my hands into fists. Again, she intentionally used the wrong name.

“I’m going to be late,” I said through clenched teeth as I grabbed my coffee and headed towards the door.

“We’ll talk about this later, Amelia,” Matthew said. “Okay?”

“I’ll bet we will,” I said under my breath.

I grabbed my briefcase from the closet where I’d left it the night before, and left without saying goodbye to either of them. I was fuming as I drove towards the office.

I had convinced Matthew to get the extra key back from Seline and had gotten the locks changed so that only Matthew and I had the keys. I didn’t even give my mother-in-law a key, but that didn’t stop her from meddling.

As time went on, Seline became a constant presence. She was always at my in-laws every time Matthew and I were there. My mother-in-law made sure to sit her right beside Matthew every time. She would do her best to make sure they were together, but sometimes she pretended to “forget” that I was coming as well and would scramble to get a place setting, chair, and rearrange the seating.

“The least you could have done is have said thank you to my mother,” Matthew seethed at me one night after another, ‘Oops, forgot Matthew would be bringing his wife to a family dinner.’

“Thank you?” I asked. “For what? Pretending to forget you’re married and that your wife would also be joining for dinner? It’s amazing that she never seems to forget to invite Seline. But somehow she manages to forget that you’re married.”

“Stop making something out of nothing,” Matthew said. “Seline is back in town and she’s been away for a long time. She doesn’t know a lot of people and we grew up together. It’s natural that my parents would invite her so she doesn’t feel so lonely. After her parents moved across the country, she lost touch with a lot of the families in the city that we grew up with.”

“And I should be grateful that your mother manages to forget my existence until I show up apparently uninvited?”

“Amelia, you’re not uninvited. My mother is getting older. She forgets things sometimes,” Matthew explained, running his hands up and down my arms as he hugged me and kissed the top of my head. He continued running his hands over my body.

That was the night the twins were conceived.

“Maybe after the babies are born, you should stay home to raise them?” Matthew asked one night after getting home from dinner at his parents’. There was no doubt, Seline was there and all over him. I could smell her perfume – cloyingly sweet. It turned my stomach.

I hadn’t been feeling well and declined to join. Matthew didn’t make a fuss, my mother-in-law didn’t bother calling to see if I was alright, not that I was expecting her to, and Matthew didn’t even think twice about going without me.

“Just relax. Rest. Have some chicken broth or toast, stay on the couch. Binge one of your legal dramas. I’ll check in with you, okay?” He said.

“Can’t you stay home with me? I’m feeling really awful, Matthew. It would be nice to have you to snuggle with,” I said, trying not to sound like I was pleading.

“You’ll be fine, Amelia. It’s the pregnancy. Mrs. Watkins is here if you need anything. And Bentley is on the cottage if you need to go anywhere. Though I can’t imagine where you’d need to go if you’re sick. Just rest, okay? I don’t need you getting stressed on top of feeling sick,” he said, running his fingers through my hair. It felt nice. I relaxed. Maybe I was overthinking things anyway.

He didn’t come home until after midnight. I was still on the couch because moving was agony. My body hurt, my back hurt, and I felt nauseated all night. Mrs. Watkins checked in on me throughout the evening, warmed up some chicken broth for me, and even put some egg noodles in.

“Just to give you and those babies a little extra oomph, hmm?” She smiled sweetly at me. The soup sat fine, and my stomach didn’t rebel.

At 10:30, she came to check on me again, left me a cup of tea, and I dismissed her for the night.

“Feel better, Mrs. Davenport,” she said, with genuine concern.

“You can call me Amelia, Mrs. Watkins,” I said, not wanting to share the name with my mother-in-law. Every time someone called me ‘Mrs. Davenport’, my stomach rolled, and I tensed up.

“Amelia, then,” she smiled. “Make sure you get some sleep, hm? You need to stay strong for those two little bundles.”

I caressed my growing belly and smiled. Two. Twins. We would not find out their gender until they were born. We were already talking about names for boys and girls.

I fell asleep on the couch, waiting for Matthew to come home. When he did, he was not quiet, despite the darkness in the house. I was in the den, with the TV on but no other light. He startled me awake when he slammed the front door.

“Matthew?” I called out, disoriented from having fallen asleep on the couch.

“Amelia!” He seemed stunned to find me in our own home. “I didn’t expect to see you there. Why aren’t you in bed, sweetheart?”

He came right over and sat on the coffee table in front of me. He looked at me, and I could swear I heard actual concern in his voice.

“I guess I fell asleep,” I said sheepishly. I was hit, then, by the cloying scent of roses—Seline’s perfume.

“Darling, you shouldn’t be sleeping on the couch. Think of the babies. They need you to be getting proper rest,” he said, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear.

“I don’t think the babies are aware of where I fall asleep,” I said.

“But you are. Your body needs rest, too. Good rest. Come. I’ll help you up to bed,” he smiled at me as he stood, offering me his hand.

I took it, and he gently helped me stand. He put his hand on the small of my back and led me gently to the stairs.

“Did you eat anything?” He asked.

“Mrs. Watkins warmed some soup for me and put noodles in it. And I had some tea,” I said.

“Okay, good,” he smiled. I thought maybe I was being paranoid. Or my pregnancy hormones were messing with my head. I’d heard that sometimes hormones can make pregnant women feel like their world is spinning out of control.

Matthew led me to the bedroom and helped me get comfortable under the covers. Then he went into the bathroom, and I heard him turn on the shower. At the very least, he’d wash that disgusting smell off him. Seline made the nicest things seem rotten—her sickeningly sweet and cloying perfume, for starters.

“Are you still awake?” Matthew asked as he slipped into bed beside me.

“Yes,” I said, my back to him.

“We were talking at dinner,” Matthew said. I clenched my fists.

“I’m sure you were,” I said, trying to keep the sarcasm and hurt out of my voice.

“My mom thinks you should give up the law office once the babies are born. Stay home and raise the babies. That way you raise them, and me, of course, and not a nanny or strangers. We do well enough that you don’t need to work,” he said, his fingers trailing up my arm. It turned my stomach.

I turned over and sat up.

“You want me to give up everything I’ve worked hard for?” I asked. “You want me to throw away my education, my partnership and my career?”

“It’s not ‘throwing it away,” Matthew said. “It’s taking on a different role. My mom was home to raise me, we can afford for you to stay home. You don’t have to stay home forever. Just take a few years off. Once the kids are in school, then you can go back. Or maybe you’ll come be legal counsel for Davenport Industries.”

“My mom worked really hard to help me go to university and then Law School,” I argued. “And I worked really hard to do well, get hired by a top firm and get a Junior Partnership in less than five years in the firm. My mentor and professor asked me to co-write a textbook. I can’t give all that up.”

“Amelia,” Matthew said, looking at me. “Think of the children. You’re working so hard, it’s hard on your body, and so is building a whole new human, let alone two! I just want what’s best for you and the kids. I know how hard you worked in university – remember? I only passed Business Law because of you. But we’re doing really well, and I want to pamper you. I don’t want you running everywhere. The stress of litigation can’t be good for you and the babies. Please, just think about it, okay?”

I looked at him incredulously.

Four years of university and then four more years of law school. The youngest Junior Partner in the history of Hoffman, Givens and Pratt. And Matthew and his mother, and presumably Seline, because she had obviously been at dinner, had discussed whether I should continue working.

I turned my back to him again and pulled the covers up to my chin.

“All I’m asking is that you think about it,” Matthew said, touching my shoulder. I pushed his hand off.

I fell into a fitful sleep.

Seeing as the next day was Saturday, and I didn’t have any responsibilities to attend to, I slept in a little longer and took my time getting ready for the day. Matthew was already out of bed when I woke up. I didn’t think much of it, because on weekends we both followed our own schedules.

I got dressed and went downstairs, hoping to make myself a nice cup of tea and read through some briefs I needed to have ready for Monday.

I was not expecting to find the Davenports in my dining room at nine in the morning.

“So nice of you to join us, Amelia,” my mother-in-law said snarkily.

“What?” I said, still trying to understand what I was seeing. Matthew hadn’t mentioned anything about his parents coming over this morning. And, of course, sitting right beside my husband was Seline, looking like the cat who caught the canary.

“I said,” my mother-in-law said, raising her voice. “It is…”

“Yes, Rachel, I heard you. I wasn’t expecting company this morning,” I said, frowning and looking at Matthew. I took a quick inventory of the table. Four seats. Five people. I wasn’t even invited to this ‘breakfast’?

“Surely Matthew told you we were coming over,” Rachel said. “It’s a good thing you have Mrs. Watkins, or we would have been waiting until noon to get a bite to eat or a cup of coffee.”

“Well,” I said, crossing my arms across my chest. “By looking at the table settings, it doesn’t look to me that you were all that concerned about my presence.”

I saw guilt flash across Matthew’s face, as I had been looking straight at him while speaking.

“I didn’t know Seline was coming with them,” he said. “And I didn’t know when you’d be up. So I let Seline sit in your seat and I can get you a setting. It’s not a big deal, Amelia.”

Not a big deal? I thought to myself. Yesterday I skipped dinner because I hadn’t been feeling well. Last night my husband dropped on me that he and his family had discussed my future without asking me for any input. And then this morning I wake up and find an entire brunch happening literally right under my nose, that apparently I was supposed to know about, and host, but wasn’t actually intended to be included in?

“It’s fine,” I said. “I’m just going to grab a cup of tea and go… somewhere else.”

“Amelia,” Matthew pleaded as I walked towards the kitchen. “Don’t be like that. Seline wasn’t supposed to be here, and I forgot to tell you last night. I was worried about how you were feeling.”

“You were so worried, you stayed out until after midnight?” I asked.

“I lost track of time,” he said sheepishly. “I’m sorry.”

Matthew had followed me into the kitchen, where I had turned the kettle on. Mrs. Watkins was watching us, and I saw her smile kindly at me and roll her eyes. She didn’t like Seline much, either.

“And I suppose I shouldn’t be upset that Seline is, once again, seated right beside you, in my own home, Matthew?”

“Amelia, how many times do I have to explain this? Seline and I have known each other our entire lives. I didn’t know when you’d wake up and so I let her sit in your seat. I can ask her to move. It’s not a big deal.”

“Yes, Matthew, it is a big deal. The fact that you don’t see what’s happening is disappointing. Don’t bother setting me a place. I have some briefs to review, which I’ll take in the study.”

“There’s nothing happening, Amelia. You’re being paranoid. It’s probably the hormones, and you’ll feel better once you have the babies. You’ll see, staying home to raise them will be so much more relaxing and stress-free,” he said. Still trying to push the stay-at-home-mom agenda they apparently had drawn up.

I poured the hot water into my travel mug, added some sugar, and dropped a tea bag in it. I closed the lid, turned my back on Matthew, and walked out of the kitchen without saying another word, not to him, not to his guests.

I spent the morning in the study reviewing the briefs I would need for Monday’s meetings, making necessary changes and changing what needed changing. I sighed as I finished reading through the second brief and stared at my open computer. I sent an email to my assistant with the changes to the brief that I needed made for Monday, and let her know that I was sorry I was asking her to work on the weekend. I would make it up to her somehow. Give her a day off soon, or something.

By the time I was done with my work, my stomach started to growl, and I saw that it was one in the afternoon. Definitely time to get something to eat, and hopefully, Matthew’s guests would be gone.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t so lucky. One o’clock in the afternoon, and they were all still here.

“Amelia!” Seline said as I came out of my study. “There you are!”

I looked at her incredulously, then looked over at Matthew and his parents. I couldn’t read their expressions, and I wasn’t sure I was doing a good job of hiding my disdain for finding them all still sitting in my house.

“I was in the study the whole time,” I said. “It’s not like you didn’t know that. Is there something you need?”

“No need to be rude, Amelia,” Rachel said.

“I wasn’t being rude, Rachel,” I said. “I was caught by surprise that you’re all still sitting here.”

“Are we suddenly not welcome to come visit with you and our son?” Rachel asked.

“I never said, nor alluded to that,” I said. “I was stating that I was not expecting that you’d still be here.”

I don’t think that came across any better, but at this point, I didn’t care.

“Amelia, we’re just sitting and chatting,” Matthew said. Seline moved closer to him as though she were the woman of the house. “We thought maybe if you got done with your work, you’d join us, and we could just have a nice afternoon together.”

I looked pointedly at Matthew and then walked away from the den and into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich.

Mrs. Watkins was cleaning the kitchen while I made my sandwich, careful to clean up after myself, so she didn’t have to repeat the work she had just done.

Seline followed me a minute later and placed a mug onto the counter where the liquid inside sloshed out on Mrs. Watkins’ freshly wiped-down and cleaned countertop. Mrs. Watkins looked at the mug and then at Seline and rolled her eyes.

“Seline,” I said. “Mrs. Watkins just cleaned there. Could you please spill out whatever is in there into the sink and wipe where you spilled? The mug goes in the dishwasher right where you’re standing.”

Seline looked at me as if I had asked her to chop off her own arm and beat herself with it.

“Isn’t it her job to clean?” Seline looked over at Mrs. Watkins, who frowned.

“Yes, while that may be true, and her job is to tidy up, you’re a grown adult, aren’t you? You’re capable of not making a mess, and I’m sure you’re capable of wiping up a spill you created. Mrs. Watkins is our housekeeper, not your slave.”

“It’s alright, Amelia,” Mrs. Watkins said. “It’s not a big deal to wipe it up.”

“That’s not the point, Mrs. Watkins,” I said, looking at Seline. “She intentionally spilled and expects you to clean up after her.”

“That’s her job,” Seline said.

“It’s her job to maintain the house, not clean up after unappreciative guests,” I said, emphasizing the word ‘guests.’ “You can pick up a cloth and wipe that up yourself, Seline.”

“What’s going on in here?” Matthew asked, frowning. “Seline, how long does it take to put your mug in the dishwasher?”

“I was about to, but then Amelia told me to just leave it on the counter for Mrs. Watkins to take care of. And when I accidentally spilled some of the coffee out of it, Amelia told Mrs. Watkins to clean it up,” Seline said. I rolled my eyes.

“That’s not at all true,” Mrs. Watkins said. “Ms. Seline spilled the coffee and Mrs. Amelia asked her to wipe it up.”

“Isn’t housekeeping your job?” Matthew asked Mrs. Watkins. Seline looked at me triumphantly.

“Matthew!” I said. “She’s a housekeeper, not a slave! Her job isn’t to clean up every drop and spill an uninvited guest makes.”

“Who said Seline is uninvited?” he looked at me.

“You told me you didn’t expect her to join your parents, although I don’t have any idea why I believed that in the first place,” I said.

“It’s just a small spill, Amelia,” Matthew said. “It’s not a big deal for Mrs. Watkins to wipe up.”

“If it’s just a small spill, and not a big deal, then I’m sure Seline is capable of picking up a rag and wiping her spill herself. And I’m willing to bet she has enough talent to open a dishwasher and put a dirty piece of crockery in it.”

“Amelia, stop being petty. Seline is a guest in our home. She shouldn’t be expected to clean,” Matthew frowned.

“Did I ask her to clean? I asked her to wipe a spill she made and put a mug in the dishwasher. I didn’t ask her to clear the eavestroths,” I retorted.

“Matty, it’s not a big deal. I can wipe up a tiny spill,” Seline said, her sickeningly sweet tone turning my stomach.

Unsurprisingly, even a simple task proved another way for Seline to ensure she had Matthew’s full attention. She managed to drop the mug onto the floor as she ‘wiped’ the spill. It broke and she screamed as though she’d been shot. A tiny piece of ceramic nicked a tiny cut on her ankle. She would likely not even need a band aid.

She dropped to the floor as though that tiny piece of ceramic had severed a tendon and an artery. I rolled my eyes as Mrs. Watkins, frowning, went to get the broom and dustpan.

While Matthew treated Seline like she was in imminent danger of bleeding out all over our kitchen floor, I picked up the largest pieces of the broken mug and put them in the garbage can. Mrs. Watkins came around the island and swept up the rest of the mess.

“What happened?” Rachel and David, Matthew’s father, came into the kitchen.

“Amelia made Seline drop a mug and she got cut. I’m going to take her to be looked at,” Matthew frowned at me.

“You’re taking her…? Where?” I asked.

“To the hospital, Amelia,” Matthew said. “To make sure you didn’t cause more damage!”

“You’ve nicked yourself deeper than that shaving! And you don’t run to the hospital when you do that. You stick a piece of toilet paper on your face. She doesn’t even need a band aid!” I argued.

“Oh, you’re a doctor now, too?” He frowned at me, Seline in his arms and a look of triumph on her face.

“Whatever,” I rolled my eyes. “You do what you need to do.”

“Matty! My bag!” Seline cried as they approached the door. Rachel ran, got Seline’s bag and handed it to Matthew. They left but not before Seline gave me a satisfied smile and Matthew frowned at me.

“Well, I suppose we might as well take our leave, as well,” Rachel said.

“Oh, you didn’t want to stay and chat?” I said, trying not to sound sarcastic, but secretly pushing them out the door, at least, in my mind.

“No,” Rachel said. “I don’t really see any point with Matthew and Seline gone.”

“Well, that’s a shame. To think we could have had a nice chat about the babies or what to do once they’re born.”

“I’m sure you’re capable of handling yourself,” Rachel sniffed.

She gathered her belongings and David followed out behind her.

“Thank you for brunch,” he said quietly to me. “Even though it was kind of sprung on you.”

He winked and then went out the door, closing it behind him.

I was stunned. In the four years we’d been married, David hadn’t said more than two words to me. He wasn’t intimidated by Rachel. I’d heard him admonish her for other things. But when it came to me, he’d never said a word. Not in defense of me, but also, nothing that I had heard – or overheard – that was disparaging. I didn’t know what to think.

“That family, Mrs. Amelia,” Mrs. Watkins came up to me. “They don’t seem to know what they have in you, do they? And that Ms Seline. What a piece of work.”

I turned to her and immediately, Mrs. Watkins’ face dropped and she began to apologize.

“Mrs. Watkins, please. Stop. You’re right. I know if Matthew had heard you he’d have something to say. But between you and I, it’s nice to have at least one person in my corner.”

“You come and talk with me any time you need to vent, okay? I like you. You’re a good employer. A great boss. Working for you doesn’t feel like work,” Mrs. Watkins said. I wrapped my arms around her.

“I’m sorry if this is inappropriate,” I said. “But I need this.”

Mrs. Watkins’ arms wrapped around me.

“Any time,” she said. Pulling away she smiled at me and then got a very motherly look on her face. “Now, you go rest. You’re building humans.”

I smiled at Mrs. Watkins and went into the den.

“Do you need anything?” She asked as I settled on the couch.

“No thank you, Mrs. Watkins. Unless you have something pressing to do, take a break. You deserve to relax and we’re going to be very busy in a few months,” I smiled. She did too.

“What time do you want me to have dinner ready?” She asked.

“I’ll see if Matthew is even going to be home. If he’s not coming home for dinner, I’ll just warm something up myself. I’ll let you know. Sound good?”

“Just don’t stress yourself out,” she smiled at me.

Mrs. Watkins went about doing whatever she needed to do and then went off to take a much deserved break in my opinion.

I picked up my phone and texted Matthew.

“Will you be home in time for dinner?” I sent.

“Don’t bother me. I don’t know. Seline’s cut was deeper than we thought. We could be here a while. Don’t wait for me for dinner,” he returned.

I knew for a fact that was a lie. For that tiny cut to have been worse than it was, she would have had to have a huge chunk stuck in her. She was manipulating my husband. And the worst part?

I don’t think he cared.

Chapter 4

The twins were born on Founder’s Day during the city’s fireworks display.

Matthew was by my side throughout my labour and delivery and I thought that maybe I had been overthinking and being a little crazy about Seline. Maybe it was the hormones. But when I needed him the most, he was right by my side.

Alex was born first. He was pink and screaming, clearly unhappy about leaving the comfort of the womb.

Matthew smiled and I cried tears of joy as he was born and they said our first was a boy. The nurses got him all cleaned up while I pushed out the second baby.

Anna. My little girl. My little princess. She was much quieter and a little smaller than her brother. As soon as they brought her over to me, she looked up at me with such intensity I could swear she could see into my soul. She was tiny and perfect. Her nose looked like a little button and her ears were so teeny.

I took a good look at my son when they brought him over after I’d finished birthing his sister. He had a slight frown on his face, still clearly unhappy about his eviction. He had a strong chin and his father’s nose. He was already a curious little fellow. He was looking around everywhere he could.

I know babies haven’t got the best vision for the first few months of life, but my kids looked like they could see everything and everyone.

We had agreed, Matthew and I, that I would try breastfeeding but that I would also pump so Matthew could feed them from a bottle. Of course, that was going to depend on whether I produced enough milk for both.

Once the babies and I had been all cleaned up I was returned to my room where Matthew and I lay together on the bed, each of us holding a baby, enjoying each other’s company and marveling at these two tiny humans that the hospital was just going to let us take home!

My mother was the first to arrive, followed almost immediately by my in-laws. The tension could be cut with a knife.

If I thought my mother-in-law looked down on me, it was nothing in comparison to how she treated my mother with disdain. In fact, she treated Mrs. Watkins better than she treated my mother, and she was not nice to Mrs. Watkins – because she’s ’the help’.

My mother gushed over me and the babies. We FaceTimed with my brother who was away for school and my sister was on her way from college to meet her niece and nephew.

My brother gushed over the babies and said he couldn’t wait to come home and spoil them.

“You’ll have some competition there,” Matthew smiled.

My brother frowned. He never really did like Matthew and he never did come around to changing his opinion.

When my in-laws came in, I saw my mother almost immediately take a step back. I grabbed her hand so she wouldn’t move. I refused to let Rachel intimidate her.

“Collette,” my mother-in-law said, tersely. If I am honest, I’m surprised Rachel even acknowledged her.

“Rachel,” my mother replied. “It’s good to see you for such a happy occasion.”

Rachel barely acknowledged my mother and simply hummed.

I smiled at my mom. She tried and she knew who she was dealing with. But she was always a lady and always pleasant to my in-laws, even if they were rarely pleasant back. That was something I always loved about my mother.

Eventually, the nurse told my in-laws and my mom that visiting hours were over and that they would have to leave and let our new little family rest, relax and get to know each other.

After many pictures and kisses and hugs – even Rachel hugged me for what I’m pretty sure was the first time – they all left and Matthew and I were left alone with our two sleeping angels.

A little while later, Alex started squawking for food, so, with the nurse’s help, we got both babies latched on and they both nursed themselves to sleep.

Matthew transferred both babies into the little bassinettes in our room and settled into the chair beside my bed.

“You did amazing, Amelia. They’re so beautiful. Our little Prince and Princess,” he smiled at me. “I’m so proud of you.”

I smiled. It was the first time in a long while that I heard words of praise from Matthew. Everything else always seemed to be an issue for him. Especially with Seline in the picture.

I had begun to notice that Matthew would compare something Seline did to something I had done. He had seemingly forgotten that I had been nine months pregnant with twins and didn’t exactly have the same energy level as someone who wasn’t pregnant.

But tonight, with the fireworks in the sky above the city, he was beside me, marvelling at our two beautiful children as they slept in their little bassinettes, all swaddled in receiving blankets and tiny hats covering their tiny heads. I fell asleep staring at the babies.

After what had to have only been a couple of hours, I was awoken by the babies starting to whimper. Figuring they were probably both hungry and in need of a diaper change, I sat up and turned on the light that, presumably, Matthew had turned off so we could get some sleep.

“Matthew, can you grab me a couple of diapers?” I asked and then looked up at the chair he’d been sitting in. It was empty. He’d left and hadn’t said a word. He’d probably gone to get a coffee, or use the washroom, or get some air. I figured he’d probably be back in a little while and thought nothing more about it as I called for a nurse to assist me with getting the babies changed and fed.

The nurse weighed each baby and noted their weight and said she would weight them again when they were finished. She wanted to ensure they were getting enough to eat and were gaining weight.

“Although, it’s not uncommon for babies to lose a little bit of their birth weight in the first couple of days, we want to make sure they don’t continue losing weight,” she explained to me.

Once again, the nurse helped me get the babies latched and they fed a little longer this time than they had the first time.

I marvelled at the two adorable little creatures attached to my breasts. They made suckling noises as they nursed and Alex let out a little grunt every once in a while.

Once they were done, the nurse weighed each one before swaddling them back up in their receiving blankets and placing them back in their bassinettes where they immediately fell asleep again. I guess being born is hard work.

I decided to wait a little to see if Matthew would return but fell asleep again before he did.

It was the babies who woke me up a second time. Once again a nurse came to help me and Matthew was still absent.

“Have you seen my husband by any chance?” I asked the nurse.

“He left here hours ago. Got a phone call and left in a hurry,” she said, as she put Alex on the scale before helping me latch him again.

I frowned, wondering who could have called and had him running. It had to have been for work. Davenport Industries was in the middle of a huge merger, but I couldn’t imagine that something would have come up in the middle of the night that Matthew would have to attend to immediately.

I decided not to think about it and gladly welcomed my friends who had come to visit and meet the babies.

“Word around the office is you’re not coming back,” my assistant Emily said.

“I’m taking some time off to be with my kids, yes. But I’m not sure how long I’ll be off for,” I said. I had left my return open.

After the surprise brunch months ago, Matthew and I had a serious talk. I had explained how I was feeling and that I didn’t appreciate my future being discussed without me being present. We had agreed I would take the first year off and we’d discuss extending it in a few months.

As much as I wanted to be a mother, I loved being a lawyer. Jason Anderson, the professor who has asked me to co-write the text book with him, and I had started the project. I was excited by it. I loved the research. I loved explaining what I did as a job in a way high school students could hopefully appreciate and enjoy learning about as well. I considered the textbook my legacy. No matter what, if our project got published, I would always have left a part of my knowledge for others to learn from. And I had no reason to believe the book wouldn’t get published. We had already been getting praises from the publisher, the editor, Jason’s agent, who had agreed to represent me in this project as well, and even some of the test readers had said they found the material approachable. Exactly as I had hoped.

I would continue with the book once I was released from the hospital. Jason would come to the house to work or we’d meet when we could. Either at a library or coffee shop.

But first I had to recover from pushing two babies out of my body. We were far enough ahead of our deadlines that Jason wasn’t too concerned if I took a few weeks off to recuperate and recharge.

My friends and colleagues left just as my lunch was arriving and as Alex decided he needed to show the world the might of his bowels.

My nurse, Jaqueline, helped me get him cleaned up and into a fresh diaper and sleeper. She took my blanket for the hospital laundry to clean. I felt badly that they’d have to deal with baby poop, but Jacqueline assured me the hospital laundry saw far more than baby poop and it would not faze them.

Matthew sauntered in at three o’clock, staring at his phone. I had just gotten the babies back down for a nap and had contemplated sleeping a little myself.

“Oh,” he said as he came into the room. It was almost as though he was surprised to find me exactly where he had left me the night before. “Hi.”

“Did you get lost?” I asked, looking at him in a fresh set of clothes, hair washed and styled in his usual style. He’d gone home and showered at least at some point.

“What do you mean?” He frowned at me.

“I woke up in the middle of the night and you were gone. I thought you’d gone to get coffee or a snack, but it’s three in the afternoon and this is the first time I’ve seen you since the babies were born,” I said.

“Amelia,” he said, a slight hint of exasperation in his voice. “You know we’re in the middle of a merger. Something came up and I was up all night trying to deal with it. I just ran home to shower and change and came straight back here.”

He came over and kissed my forehead.

I nearly vomited from the cloying, sweet scent of artificial roses.

Seline’s perfume.

“Mom and Dad say hello and they’ll come visit again when we get home. I have a surprise for you at home, by the way,” he winked at me.

“Mmhm,” I said.

“You’re not mad, are you?” He asked, looking at me with puppy dog eyes. “I didn’t think I’d be as long as I was. It was more complicated than I’d thought and took up the whole night. I promise, Amelia, I was in the office all night.”

“Was Seline in the office with you?” I asked, waving my hand in front of my nose.

“Of course not,” he frowned.

“Then have you taken to wearing women’s perfume? Because I can smell hers all over you.”

“Oh!” He said, realization crossing his face. “She came by the house to drop off a baby gift. You’ll love it!”

I doubted that very much, and already intended to dispose of whatever it was as soon as we were home.

I didn’t have the energy to argue just now, so I just accepted his explanation and relaxed back on the bed.

We went home a few days later, and I was looking forward to sleeping in my own bed, wearing my own clothes again, and just relaxing as a new family of four.

Matthew carried both of the babies’ carriers into the house and I followed close behind. I was looking forward to the quiet.

“Oh! You’re home!” I heard a voice I was hoping to be the absolute last voice I would have heard in my home. “Can I see the babies?”

My instinct was to shield both of the babies from Seline, but Matthew, smiling, carried them into the den. I could hear Seline squealing and gushing over them. I walked into the den on my own.

“Oh, Amanda, they’re absolutely gorgeous!” Seline said in my general direction. I didn’t respond.

“Amelia?” Matthew asked, looking at me.

“Yes?” I said.

“Aren’t you going to respond?” he said.

“Respond to what?” I asked, feigning innocence.

“Seline just said the babies are gorgeous. Didn’t you hear her?” he said.

“I heard her, but she wasn’t talking to me,” I said.

“Don’t be ridiculous. Who else would she be talking to?” he frowned at me.

“Whoever ‘Amanda’ is,” I said. “Because after five years, she still hasn’t managed to get my name right. So, she couldn’t have been talking to me, because my name is not Amanda. And you know that perfectly well.”

I was tired of this ridiculous game Seline kept wanting to play and I wasn’t playing it any longer.

“Amelia, stop being petty. Seline probably just wasn’t thinking,” Matthew said.

“That would explain a lot,” I muttered.

“Did Matthew show you what I got the babies, Andrea?” Seline asked, looking up at us.

I looked at Matthew and raised my eyebrow at him. Twice she’d used the wrong name and even Matthew had to do a double take.

“Amelia hasn’t been home, Seline,” he said, emphasizing my name. “I haven’t had a chance to show her.”

“Come! Let me show you!” Seline said, jumping up and grabbing my hand. I pulled my hand back. Saline frowned.

“Amber, don’t be upset,” she pouted. I frowned again and looked pointedly at Matthew. He shrugged and then nodded that I should follow Seline. She was heading towards the stairs.

Reluctantly, I followed her upstairs and down the hallway towards the nursery Matthew and I had set up for them. We had spent so much time picking out furniture and bedding, toys, mobiles, a rocking chair and footrest. The room had been painted in calming colours and truly was an oasis.

I was really hoping Seline had gotten something I would be able to easily dispose of and no one would notice.

“I was so excited I almost gave away the surprise before you had the babies,” she gushed.

Seline turned and opened the door to the nursery. My heart dropped. I could not believe what I was seeing. I was livid.

She had changed the nursery Matthew and I had spent days and months planning together, decorating together, and agreeing on everything together. Only for Seline to come in and ruin the whole room.

The muted tan and taupe was now a garish sunshine yellow. The indigo drapes were replaced with multicoloured drapes that let all the sunshine into the room. The furniture had been changed from the pine cribs I had found from a local furniture maker to standard white cribs with horribly ugly inlays and characters painted on them.

“She’s speechless!” Seline said to Matthew as he came into the room with the babies in their carriers.

“Amelia?” Matthew said, coming up beside me. “Do you have anything to say?”

I looked at him and then at Seline. I looked back at Matthew. He was smiling encouragingly, waiting for me to say something.

“Excuse me,” I said, turned around and walked out of the room and then into mine and Matthew’s room where I locked myself in the bathroom.

I slid down to the floor, my back against the door and sobbed. All the work, the time spent together making the babies’ room perfect and a calm space for them. Ruined. Completely and totally ruined. And he’d let it happen.

“Amelia?” I heard Matthew knock on the door. I didn’t respond. “Amelia, honey? Seline wanted to do something special for you and the babies. She worked really hard on that.”

“What about the time we put into that room? What about what we decided together for our children, Matthew?”

“Seline wanted to do…”

“Seline, Seline, Seline,” I cried. “Whatever she wants she gets, is that it, Matthew? Who cares what Amelia wants. Who cares that Amelia spent hundreds of hours looking at furniture and colour swatches and planning a perfect room for our children. As long as Seline is happy, why should I complain?”

“Amelia…” Matthew started. I heard him try the door handle. “Amelia, unlock the door and let me in. We can talk about this.”

I made no move to open the door.

“Adelaide?” Seline’s false sweet voice came through the door. “Did I do something wrong? Do you not like the room? I’m sorry if you don’t like it. I thought a nice, bright room for two amazing babies would be nice. I’m sorry. I just wanted to do something nice for you.”

I didn’t respond. I couldn’t. The words that were at the tip of my tongue would do nothing to improve the situation. So I stayed silent, tears streaming down my face. How was I going to go into that room every day and not feel what I was feeling right now?

I was angry, yes. But I also felt hurt and betrayed. How could Matthew have let Seline do that to the twins’ room? After the hours and days and time spent making that room up together for our children, how could he let anyone else just come and change it without a second thought.

Eventually I heard footsteps leaving our bedroom and the silence that followed. I stayed in the bathroom for a little while longer, hoping Seline wasn’t in the house anymore when I got up and opened the door.

I couldn’t leave the babies, obviously, so I went to the nursery to see if Matthew had at least put them in those cribs. I shuddered at the thought of walking into that room that was so different from what I had envisioned, planned and had set up, only for Matthew’s precious Seline to undo everything.

But the babies weren’t in their room when I went in to check. I listened carefully, but didn’t hear anything.

I raced downstairs, hoping maybe Mrs. Watkins, who I hadn’t even had a chance to say hello to yet, might have the kids with her.

I practically skidded to a halt when I passed the den.

There was Matthew sitting on the sofa, holding one of the babies, while Seline sat, nice and cozy, beside him holding the other. They were smiling and whispering as they looked at my children. And the last person I wanted touching my children was Seline.

I cleared my throat. They both looked up. A look of guilt crossed Matthew’s face for a fleeting second.

Matthew put the baby down into the car seat and came over to me. He put his hands gently on my shoulders.

“Are you feeling better now?” he asked, sounding concerned, but not quite looking it,

“No,” I said, frowning at him. “No. I do not feel better. I won’t feel better until that room goes back to the way we decorated it, Matthew.”

“Seline worked really hard on that,” Matthew said. “You should apologize to her. You made her feel awful.”

I gaped at Matthew. I… I should apologize to her?

“I-I’m sorry?” I asked in a low voice. “I should apologize to her?”

I was incredulous.

“You made her feel terrible. She wanted to do something nice for you and the babies and she thought you’d prefer a bright and sunny room for them,” Matthew said.

I stared at him.

“Have you had an accident? Did you hit your head or something?” I growled at him.

“What?” he frowned at me.

“Do you have amnesia?” I seethed.

“No. What are you talking about?” he frowned deeper.

“Do you not remember the hours and days we – you and I – spent decorating that room? The colour swatches? The paint swatches? The hours in the furniture store picking the beautiful oak cribs we spent a small fortune on?”

He opened his mouth to speak, and then closed it. He did that another couple of times.

“It’s just a room, Amelia,” he said. “Don’t worry. Maybe we can compromise. Put the oak cribs in there. I have to admit, those white cribs, they’re kinda ugly.”

He smiled at me and touched his forehead to mine.

I didn’t want to acquiesce but I also just wanted to rest, relax and bond with my babies and my husband. Besides, pregnancy hormones and post-pregnancy hormones, am I right?

Chapter 5

Present

“Amelia, I don’t know where you are, and your phone is going straight to voicemail. Stop being so petty. It wasn’t a big deal. So you forgot the drinks. You didn’t have to stay out all night. Tell me where you are, I’ll come get you.”

Matthew hung up the phone and frowned. He was confused. It wasn’t like me to not come home, even after an argument. When he’d woken up this morning, he had seen I still hadn’t come home. Well, I had – just not the way he would notice.

When he saw I hadn’t come to bed, he smirked, thinking I’d just gone to sleep in a guest room, or something. He’d let me keep having my little tantrum. He’d stop somewhere on the way home and bring me a gift. A trinket to buy my happiness. A way for him to show everyone he loved me. Because he always apologized with jewelry. Or a car. The car I had driven last night, in fact.

He bought the car for me after he got home from a ‘business trip’, and it had slipped that for some reason, Seline had been on the trip as well. Seline. Who suddenly had taken an interest in importing and exporting, but who had never done a single day in business school, had a degree in fine arts, and I did have to admit, did have some talent for her jewelry. I bet you can’t guess who designed most of the jewelry he tries to buy my forgiveness with.

But two years ago, when he let slip about Seline being on the ‘business trip’, he bought me the car to apologize. Even though the Range Rover I was driving was only six months old, I liked it. He bought me the little Miata for fun and for quick trips. And admittedly, it was a fun car to drive. And perfect for quick trips across town.

Until it gets hit by a truck speeding around a traffic accident, causing your little Miata to roll down the embankment and into a tree. Where it still lay, and where my body was mere meters away.

The night had not been kind to me. Animals, attracted by the scent of my blood, no doubt, had satiated their appetites. And now, with the sun up, its rays came through the trees, which didn’t offer much coverage. It was July. It was hot and humid. And today, the meteorologist on the morning news that Matthew listened to as he went about shaving and getting dressed said it was expected to break previous records. Matthew hadn’t heard that because he was planning on going into the guest room at the end of the hall to surprise me with a wake-up kiss and an apology, which would sound heartfelt, but by this time, I’d come to expect and could have recited along with him.

It was when I wasn’t in any of the guest rooms that he thought to call. He checked that I was in neither of the children’s rooms. He was careful not to wake them. It was summertime. No need to wake them early. They were on holiday from school. This was their time to relax.

And so, after double-checking I hadn’t slept on the couch, he rolled his eyes and called my mobile. Knowing him, he figured that I had gone to our apartment in the city, where we stayed sometimes if we were going to be downtown late and didn’t want to drive home, like at company parties, where sometimes, we’d enjoy the freedom of having the nanny Matthew had hired for when we came home from the hospital with the twins. Or, possibly, he thought, I had stayed in a hotel. He put the phone on speaker and checked our credit card app to see if there had been a hotel charge.

He frowned when he saw that not only hadn’t I used our credit card to book myself into a hotel, I hadn’t even bothered to stop at the store to get the damned drinks. I could have brought them home, despite skipping the fireworks display, and apologized to the twins for forgetting them. They’d forgive their mom for her oversight.

He figured he would swing by the apartment on his way into the office and went into the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee to go. He left, not even thinking about anything beyond telling me what I wanted to hear, and then apologizing. Maybe he’d take the morning off, and he could apologize properly to me in our bed in the apartment.

It barely caught his notice that there was a massive hole in the barrier along the highway. He saw the remnants of the accident that I had been trying to get around – the sawdust still spread on the road to absorb the gasoline, oil, and other fluids. If he’d paid a little more attention, he might have noticed the dark blue paint scratch on the broken barrier. The exact same blue as my little car.

No. Matthew was already picturing his ‘apology’, and shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

He tried my mobile again, knowing I rarely slept past eight these days, and even in the apartment, I would probably be up and have turned my phone on. I had never gone more than a few hours without speaking to him or responding to him.

Again, it went straight to voicemail. His anger replaced what he’d been feeling just moments ago.

“So petty and childish,” he groaned.

Meanwhile, the ringing of my phone, still clutched in my hand, attracted a pair of stray dogs.

I watched for a minute as the dogs sniffed around my body and then took what they needed. I turned away, though. At least something somewhat good came from my lonely death, I suppose.

The temperature that day broke even the anticipated record. A ray of sun glinted off the glass nearby.

Matthew pulled into the parking area for our apartment. He frowned when he didn’t see my car in my usual spot. He rolled his eyes, figuring I’d parked in one of the guest spots on the next level. He shook his head and sighed. Somehow, he was going to have to do something to make this up to me. He wasn’t sure what it was this time that I was still ignoring him, and the kids. But, after we talked, and maybe made love, he’d still have to find a way to make it up to me, whatever I was mad about this time.

Oh, Matthew. If you only knew, there’s nothing you can do to make this up to me. Not really. I have no more use for jewelry, handbags, spa days, new cars, the newest smartphone, or any other trinket or class or experience you think will make up for 25 years of doing everything for everyone, with no thanks, no appreciation, and no honesty. 25 years in which you poisoned my own children against me. 25 years in which your mother still never managed to remember that I would come to dinner with you and the kids. But she never managed to forget to invite Seline even after she got married. Even, and especially after, she got divorced and was left a ‘poor, single mother’. A ‘poor’ single mother on a million-dollar-a-month allowance plus child support. Poor indeed.

If only you knew that the nights in the office, which became more and more frequent, never stayed in the office. Yes, Matthew. I also received notifications when you scanned your key fob into the parking area for our downtown apartment, which is why it shouldn’t have surprised you that you didn’t see my car. You didn’t get a notification because I never scanned into the complex.

But that would require you to think with your head. The one with your two eyes and mouth. Because right now, you’re wondering if I’m putting on a little show for you. That maybe this was something I had planned, to get a little time alone with you.

If only you had paid a little bit of attention last night, Matthew. If only you checked the location app for the key fob, since it would have tracked from my previous time accessing the complex two weeks ago. And that was to check and make sure any food in the pantry hadn’t expired, to make sure nothing had been left in the fridge to go bad, and to do a little clean up, dust, change linens, stuff we could always get a service to do. Still, since I hadn’t worked since the twins were born, I’d taken it upon myself to do so, so I had a reason to go somewhere.

It was during one of those housekeeping visits that I found the bra. It was definitely not mine. The twins breastfed until they were fourteen months, and I could not pull off that lacy strip of cloth anymore. And I didn’t even have to guess who it belonged to. I would recognize that nauseating synthetic rose smell anywhere.

I didn’t say a word to Matthew about it. I just left it on his pillow after I remade the bed with fresh and clean sheets.

That’s when I got the Range Rover.

However, today, Matthew didn’t think to check the app connected to our fobs. He just rode the elevator up to our apartment and unlocked the door, expecting to either find me sitting in the den drinking coffee or out on the balcony.

He was confused by the lack of coffee smell coming from the kitchen. The TV wasn’t on, which it would be if I were in the den drinking my coffee, and he could see from the doorway that the drapes covering the sliding door out onto the balcony were closed. I wasn’t outside.

Matthew smirked, thinking maybe I was waiting in the bedroom, and began loosening his tie and undoing the top button of his dress shirt.

He stopped when he reached the bedroom and saw that the bed was still made from my last housekeeping visit.

Frowning, he checked the other bedrooms and even his office. I wasn’t in the apartment.

“Amelia,” he said, calling my phone again and getting my voicemail. “This is ridiculous. I don’t even know what you’re mad about. It can’t be about us not waiting for you to go to the fireworks. But I can’t think of what else it is. I’m at the apartment and you’re not here, you didn’t come home. Are you in a hotel? Are you downtown? Tell me where you are. I’m getting worried.”

He’s just now getting worried? He wasn’t concerned when he woke up and saw I hadn’t come to bed? He wasn’t concerned when he saw I hadn’t slept in the house at all? He wasn’t worried when my phone, which I always keep charged in case there’s an emergency, went straight to voicemail. He wasn’t concerned when he didn’t see my car in the parking area? Or didn’t see a notification that my fob had been swiped? It wasn’t until he was confronted with an empty apartment and no hotel charges on our joint accounts.

I watched Matthew as a lightbulb seemed to go on in his head. He smiled and went back down in the elevator, locking the apartment before he left.

He got into his car and drove four blocks away to the Hotel Farino. It was a small boutique hotel that Davenport Industries kept an account with. The company paid for and maintained a suite in the hotel. I could have gone there and used the room, and it would have only shown up in next month’s statement. Matthew figured he probably wouldn’t have noticed anyway, because there would have only been a small surcharge for the housekeeping services that the hotel would provide once I left the hotel after my stay. He figured that’s what I had done, and his mind, once again, wandered off and into the bedroom.

Once again, Matthew pulled into the hotel’s parking lot and took out his key card. He crossed the oak-wall-lined lobby, waved at the concierge, Philippe, and headed to the elevator. If he had stopped and spoken to Philppe, he might have learned that I hadn’t stayed in the suite last night. It would have saved him the embarrassment of coming across the CIO in the shower with his secretary. Brian had been working as Tom’s secretary for six months. It might have been a company record.

Matthew apologized profusely for barging in on them, awkwardly asked if I had come by last night, to which Tom shook his head and Brian took a step back, trying to hide from Matthew.

“Brian, I don’t care. Just keep it professional in the office,” Matthew said to the younger man. Relief and confusion fought for dominance in his features.

Matthew left the hotel and sat in his car, trying to figure out where I could have gone. He called a few of our friends, telling a tale about how we’d had a silly little spat and that I had said I was going to stay with friends, but hadn’t said with whom, and had any of them seen me?

None of our friends had, of course.

“Which is strange,” Stella, whom I served on the Golf Club’s Ladies’ Auxiliary with, said to Matthew. “We were supposed to meet for a breakfast meeting at nine, but she never showed up. And her phone stopped going through around, nine thirty, I guess. I must have called, oh, half a dozen times “

36. Thirty-SIX times, Stella. And each time, the sound attracted more animals, and then the smell. Thirty. Six. Times. Now, my phone has died along with me. It’s still clutched in my hand, but my hold is tenuous. The tendons were the last to go. A nocturnal visitor will knock the phone out of what’s left of my hand and knock it closer to the car.

In the clear blue sky, the sun is beating through the trees and refracting off the broken pieces of glass, which in turn refract onto the fluids on the ground. It’s already late, and the sun is setting, but it didn’t set quite fast enough to stop a tiny ember from catching onto the dry grass. It would simmer all night. Never quite catching, but never quite going out. It would move from blade to blade all night, the winds coming up from the ocean adding more fuel, if I can truncate a phrase.

But tomorrow morning, at six fifty-three in the morning, when the sun was already beating a path down the mountain, Jeremy Anderson, a lawyer in Santa Monica and of no actual reason to be mentioned except that Jeremy is a smoker. And Jeremy thinks the world is his ashtray. So, Jeremy’s role in my story is simply that his still-lit cigarette butt landed right within the little embers that were already catching as the wind from the ocean came up and the sun started to shine directly on a concave piece of glass.

It only took the length of a sneeze for the dry brush near my car to catch. No one on the highway even really noticed the smoke. Not until it reached the wet grass near my vehicle. Because that grass wasn’t soaked with water, my gas tank had been leaking into the grass all night.

Chapter 6

Before

“Happy birthday to you!” We all sang to Alex and Anna.

“Five years old!” I gushed at the twins as they grinned up at me. “You’re almost big enough to get a job!”

“Mamma!” Anna said, laughing. “We’re only five! We don’t have jobs!”

“Anna’s right! My kids don’t need to get jobs yet,” Matthew smiled, picking Anna up and tickling her. Her laughter was music.

“Daddy! Put Sissy down!” Alex demanded, his little hands on his little hips.

“Oh. My apologies Prince Alex,” Matthew smiled down at our son. He put Anna down, and Alex immediately grabbed her hand and pulled her along with him and their friends.

Matthew wrapped his arms around me and watched the children playing in the backyard.

“Five years old,” he said quietly.

“It’s so hard to believe our little babies are five!” I said wistfully.

I stared after the children, watching Alex take the lead with his friends, while Anna and her friends watched and played.

The kids each had their own friends, but they all seemed to get along in their own ways. I smiled as I watched the two groups mingle and merge.

Mrs. Watkins cut up the birthday cake as we tried to wrangle 20 four- and five-year-olds to tables for five minutes.

We had just gotten the last child seated with cake when a voice called out through the backyard.

“Hello?” The sickeningly sweet voice rang across the backyard.

“Aunty Seline!” The twins cried and jumped up.

Seline. Of course. And of course, she came ‘fashionably’ late in order to make an entrance no one would miss.

I watched as the twins ran to Seline and wrapped her legs in hugs.

“Oh no! I’ve been accosted by monsters!” Seline pretended to be scared.

“We’re not monsters, Aunty Seline!” Anna insisted.

“Yeah! It’s me and Anna!” Alex said.

“Oh. Thank goodness! You two didn’t see the monster that tried to eat me, did you?”

The twins laughed.

Seline unwrapped herself from the children, and they returned to their cake and friends.

“Astrid,” Seline said, coming up to Matthew and me, and giving Matthew a longer-than-appropriate hug and a kiss that was too close to his mouth for my liking.

Ten years now, and she still ‘forgot’ my name.

“Rachel!” She cried out as my mother-in-law came up to say hello to Seline. She hugged Matthew’s mother as though she hadn’t just seen her the night before at dinner.

I watched as my mother-in-law embraced Seline like a long-lost daughter. A tiny bead of jealousy rolled around my stomach. It was the one thing that I could admit I was a little jealous about. That Seline could get a warm hug from the woman who was supposed to be my mother-in-law. Rachel had yet to warm up to me, no matter how much I tried.

Matthew said I was overthinking it, but he never saw the pointed smile Seline gave me every time. He didn’t see his mother’s features change when she saw Seline. He never noticed the quiet scoff his mother gave whenever I entered a room.

Nothing I did was ever ‘quite’ good enough for Rachel Davenport.

Matthew and I had gotten the twins into one of the best schools in the city. Rachel made a comment that sounded like I was the reason they didn’t get into the best school.

“Masterson is a great school, Mom,” Matthew had argued. “It’s perfect for the kids’ needs.”

“You went to Wildling,” Rachel scoffed—the school we’d actually rejected because they didn’t offer enough art classes.

“And that was a great school. For me. Anna and Alex aren’t me,” Matthew had said.

“No,” Rachel had said, shooting a withering glance at me. “They absolutely are not you, are they?”

I had to roll my eyes.

The kids thrived at Masterson. They made friends fast, were well-liked by the staff, and excelled both academically and artistically.

When the children were done eating cake, and we’d cleaned up the mess of cups and plates, the twins insisted they wanted to open their presents for everyone to see. I had wanted to wait until everyone had gone home so no one felt like their gift wasn’t preferred over someone else’s.

But Matthew, the twins and my in-laws vetoed me.

I smiled as the children opened presents from their schoolmates and friends. Toys, books, games, and clothes began piling up on the table beside the twins. Each gift was received with excitement, awe, and hugs to the giver. I had to admit, the children knew how to make their friends feel special. No one looked put out at all.

“My turn!” Seline cried, taking an envelope and handing it to Alex. I watched Anna’s face fall when Seline didn’t give an envelope to her, too.

“Don’t be sad, little duck,” Seline reassured her. “That gift is for both of you. I gave it to Alex because he’s older.”

“By four minutes!” Anna said, scowling.

But as soon as Alex had opened the card and they saw what the gift was, Anna forgot to be upset.

“Disneyland?!” They exclaimed.

“Yeppers!” Seline smiled. “And fast passes so we don’t have to wait in long lineups!”

‘We?’ I thought to myself.

“Mommy! Look!” Alex came running over to me. “Look! Aunty Seline got us tickets to Disneyland!”

His excitement was contagious, and looking into his deep brown eyes, I couldn’t help but smile.

“How exciting!” I said, looking at the passes. There were four passes. “For all four of us?”

I looked over at Seline, who was practically hanging off Matthew, and raised an eyebrow.

“Oh,” Seline said. “I wasn’t – I didn’t think. I thought I could maybe take the kids. I didn’t think you’d want to go.”

She didn’t think I would want to go to Disneyland with my husband and my children?

“So, who is the fourth pass for?” I asked, trying not to sound upset and ruin the gift for the twins.

“I thought Matthew and I could take the twins,” Seline said.

“Please, Mommy!” Alex begged. “Please can Daddy and Aunty Seline take us?”

I handed the card and envelope with the passes in it back to Alex and excused myself, making it look like I just wanted to get some of the mess cleaned up and out of the way. In reality, I tried to escape the prying eyes of our friends and the parents of the kids’ friends. I couldn’t stand the looks I was seeing between the parents of the other children and the stolen glances they made between Matthew, Seline and me.

I carried the remainder of the cake into the kitchen, placed it on the island, and then leaned against it, drawing in a deep breath that I let out in a shuddering sigh.

Mrs. Watkins saw me standing there and looked towards the back door.

“Is everything alright, Ms Amelia?” She asked. I looked up at her.

“Yes. Thank you Mrs. Watkins. It’s fine,” I said, hoping to reassure myself as well. She looked at me sceptically.

“I take it Ms Seline got under your skin?” She smirked at me. I was careful not to drop all my grievances about Seline on Mrs. Watkins. Just in case, but she saw things and knew Seline was not on my list of favourite people.

“Not like she ever gets out.” I muttered as I took a swipe of icing off a corner piece of cake with my finger and put it in my mouth.

“Amelia!” Matthew said, coming into the kitchen. Mrs. Watkins gave me a knowing glance and busied herself putting the cake away. “There you are. You just walked out on everyone?”

“I brought the cake inside so it wouldn’t melt, Matthew,” I said, turning to face him. “And the bag of wrapping paper trash so we didn’t have garbage sitting around. You must not have noticed.”

“Don’t be like that,” he said, responding to my tone. It was clear I was not happy.

“Don’t be like what, Matthew? Like a hostess making sure trash doesn’t accumulate? Making sure our cake doesn’t melt in the heat? Or don’t be like the trash you all treat me like?” I vented.

“No one treats you like trash,” Matthew said, coming over to me and trying to wrap his arms around me. I stepped back and around the island. He frowned.

“What’s wrong now?” He asked, crossing his arms and acting as though he was the one wronged.

“Oh, nothing,” I said, flippantly. “There is absolutely nothing wrong.”

“You’re upset,” he said. “I know you’re upset. What are you so upset about?”

He was trying to appear sympathetic, but his tone came across as mocking.

“What reason have I got to be upset?” I asked, looking at him pointedly. “I mean, it’s a beautiful day, my children are having the time of their life with their friends and celebrating their birthday and they even got a trip to Disneyland as a gift! Amazing. And four passes. Just enough for us to go as a family. Oh! But wait! I’m not actually invited on the trip! But I can’t imagine anything that I could possibly be upset about. After all, Seline didn’t think that I’d want to go. To Disneyland. With my children. Why would I be upset about that?”

“Oh, Amelia,” Matthew rolled his eyes. “Is that all? I’ll buy you an admission ticket. Of course you can come.”

“Oh, can I?” I asked, feigning excitement. “Really? I can tag along on your little family vacation? Aren’t you concerned I’ll ruin all your fun?”

“What is it you’re upset about exactly?” he asked, frowning at me.

I looked him dead in the eyes, trying to determine if he was being serious, if he really didn’t understand what had me upset or if he was playing with me.

He looked back, a questioning look in his eyes. He couldn’t figure it out. He had no understanding of what had upset me.

“Do you really need me to spell it out for you?” I asked. “You really can’t come up with a single thing that I might be upset about?”

“You’re upset Seline didn’t get you a pass to Disneyland,” he said confidently.

I stared at him, gape-mouthed, shook my head at him and walked out of the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” he asked me as I headed towards the stairs. “We have a backyard full of guests.”

“Why don’t you get Seline to take over the hostessing duties? You’d clearly all prefer to have her around anyway,” I spat at him.

“Amelia, you’re being ridiculous,” Matthew said from the bottom of the stairs.

“Am I, Matthew? Really? And why, exactly, do you feel I’m being ridiculous?”

“You’re getting upset over nothing. I can buy you a Disney pass and you’ll come with us. I’m sure it was just an oversight on Seline’s part. Don’t be silly. Don’t ruin the twins’ birthday.”

“Why are you always making excuses for Seline?” I asked. “We’ve been married for ten years Matthew, and she still pretends to forget my name. We’ve been a family of four for five years, and she somehow managed to forget to buy five passes? But I’m the one being ridiculous because I have the nerve to speak up for myself? To tell you that none of her mistakes are in fact mistakes?”

“Seline has never really been one to think things through,” Matthew said. Another excuse. “She’s always been a little self-centred.”

“I hope that wasn’t an apology, or an excuse,” I said, my hands on my hips. “Because that is a shitty apology or excuse.”

“Amelia, come back downstairs. Let’s finish the kids’ birthday party, help them bring all their new stuff inside, and say goodbye to our guests. We can discuss the Disney trip later.”

And that was it for Matthew. He was done discussing the issue. Sweep it under the rug and pretend it never happened. Hope Amelia forgets, and therefore the problem doesn’t need to be dealt with.

Because I didn’t want to cause further speculation among the guests, I did go back outside with Matthew. My mother-in-law and Seline were sitting with the twins, talking animatedly. The other guests were starting to gather their children and head home. They thanked us for a lovely party, and the moms I had become friendly with made sure to remind me of our planned lunch later in the week. I had come to love the mothers of my children’s friends. Raising kids really does take a village, and knowing the mothers of other five-year-olds were experiencing some of the same challenges made me feel that much less alone.

“Mommy!” Alex came rushing over, a massive grin on his face. “Aunty Seline said we could go to Disney this week!”

“Did she?” I asked, looking over at Seline and my mother-in-law.

“I hope that’s not too soon,” Seline said. “I just figured, they’re still little and they’ll be so excited to go, I wouldn’t want to make them have to wait too long to go.”

“We will have to see what we have planned this week,” I said, more to Alex than Seline.

“Please, Mommy?” he begged.

“We’ll discuss it,” I said to Alex, who frowned and fumed as he turned away and sat back with Seline and my mother-in-law.

“You don’t have to punish the children for Seline’s oversight,” my mother-in-law said, coming over to me for the first time all afternoon.

“I’m not punishing the children,” I frowned at her. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”

“The Disney trip. You didn’t have to tell Alex they couldn’t go this week just because Seline forgot to get you a ticket. If it’s that big a deal to you, you can have mine,” she said.

It struck me then that this wasn’t just a trip with the children. It was indeed a family trip. It was just that they didn’t consider the mother of the children as part of the family. I was seething internally.

“I did not tell Alex they couldn’t go this week, Rachel,” I said, trying valiantly to maintain my composure. “I told him we would discuss it, because Matthew and I have to check that we haven’t got something already planned this week.”

“I’m sure whatever you do have planned can easily be rescheduled,” Rachel said to me dismissively before walking away and returning to where Seline was entertaining the children. Matthew stood behind her, watching with rapt attention. From the outside, they looked like quite the happy little family.

I finished taking the last of the trash and party favours inside, threw out the trash and stood in the kitchen looking out onto the yard.

I watched as the kids, Rachel, Matthew and Seline laughed together.

“Not really like you to stay so quiet,” a voice interrupted my thoughts. There stood my father-in-law. He had come in, presumably, to get another scotch from Matthew’s office.

“I’ve made my feelings known. In some cases it’s just not worth pursuing,” I said.

“Sometimes constant reminders are required,” he said as he went back outside and sat beside Rachel. I sighed.

I busied myself putting things away and ensuring that everything was cleaned up and stored, particularly the party decorations.

The sun began to set, and I decided to see if Matthew would get the kids ready to calm down for bedtime or if I was going to have to be the ‘mean’ one who takes away all the fun.

The kids’ bedtime was eight o’clock. It was seven-thirty. I gave them fifteen more minutes to see if Matthew or even his parents would clue in.

Of course, they didn’t. I went outside to collect my children and start their bedtime routine, since they needed the downtime.

“Okay, you two little munchkins,” I said, trying to make my voice sound upbeat. “It’s time to get ready for bed.”

“Aww, Mommy, can’t we stay up a little longer?” Alex whined. “Aunty Seline was telling us about Disney and all the things we can do!”

“Don’t you want to have some surprises while you’re there?” I asked. “If you know everything before you go, then it won’t be a fun surprise!”

“You mean we can go?” Alex sat up.

“Alex, I never said you couldn’t go, honey,” I said, keeping my voice steady. “I only said we would talk about whether this week would work.”

Alex frowned again.

“Aunty Seline said you’d tell us we can’t go this week,” he frowned.

Matthew’s eyes flicked between Seline and me. Seline looked at me with a look that implied to me that she was in control here. I sighed.

“Mamma didn’t say we can’t go,” Anna frowned at her brother. My little peacemaker. “She just said we can, but she needs to make sure we don’t have something happening this week first.”

“I’m sure your mother can reschedule anything you have coming up this week,” my mother-in-law said. I drew in a breath and did not say a word.

“If it’s so important to you to go this week, then fine,” I sighed. “I took a quick look at the calendar, and I don’t see anything that needs to be rescheduled.”

I wasn’t going to win this one anyway. And there was really no reason not to let them go. I’d just hoped to have some time to discuss this with Matthew without everyone around. But I could see that wasn’t going to happen.

“We can?” Alex smiled, looking up at me.

“Like I said, I never said you couldn’t go at all, Alex. But if it’s that important that it has to be this week, fine. Have a good time,” I said.

Alex got up and ran over to me, hugging my leg.

“Thank you, Mommy! You’re the best!” he said, smiling up at me. I couldn’t resist that smile even if I tried.

Chapter 7

Present

The fire caught more quickly once it reached the grass-soaked grass. The flames ran along the line of gas that had flowed a little bit down past the tree where my car was resting. The dry grass surrounding me, the tree, the car and the gas-soaked grass could no longer resist the flames and caught fire as well.

People now started to notice the smoke and flames licking up the embankment. Emergency services were called, but there was another accident further up, and another small brush fire about a mile beyond that. Emergency services would eventually make it to me, but by then, well, it was already too late for me anyway. However, by the time emergency services did make it to the site of my accident, anything that could have easily identified me would be gone.

Meanwhile, while I was lying in the grass and as the flames began making their way closer to my body, Matthew was pulling into his office and had decided that whatever I was mad about, he’d buy me something and make it up to me when he got home.

“Good morning, Mr. Davenport,” his secretary, Alice, smiled as he came in. She handed him his morning coffee, his second of the day, and his mail and phone messages. “You’re later than I’d expected. Which is fine. The shareholder’s meeting has been moved until one o’clock and your father is in your office.”

Matthew frowned, wondering why his retired father was waiting for him in his office.

“Thank you, Alice,” he said.

“Is everything alright?” she asked. She had been working for Matthew long enough to know when he was distracted by something.

“Nothing major. Amelia is upset about something and I haven’t been able to get in touch with her. If she calls today at any time, put it through to me. Okay?”

“Sure,” Alice frowned. He rarely accepted calls from me during the day, and Alice was well-versed in denying my calls.

“Dad,” Matthew said as he breezed into his office. His father was sitting on the sofa, already nursing a scotch.

“It’s not even noon yet, Dad,” Matthew frowned, looking at the glass in his father’s hand.

“I’m retired and I’m 67,” my father-in-law said to him with a slight smile. “And I have a driver. I could drink your entire stock and still not put myself in any danger.”

“Except from cirrhosis,” Matthew smirked at him. “So, to what do I owe the pleasure of an unexpected visit…”

Matthew checked his watch. I bought him a brand new Rolex for our anniversary last month.

“At ten thirty in the morning?”

“I’m not allowed to come visit my son, the CEO of the company I built? I’m not allowed to check in on my investments?”

“Dad,” Matthew shook his head at his father. “I really don’t have time for games.”

“Why are you rolling in at ten thirty, anyway?” his father frowned at him. “When I ran the place, I was one of the first ones in. Any time between seven thirty and nine.”

“I am well aware of the hours you put in here, Dad,” Matthew countered. He spent very few mornings with his father as a child. “And I usually am here much earlier. But Amelia and I had a bit of a spat last night and she stayed out somewhere. I haven’t been able to get in touch with her this morning.”

“Did you check the apartment?” his father asked.

“Of course. That was the first place I went. She wasn’t there. Then I tried the Farino. She didn’t stay there either. And she didn’t stay with any of our friends, either.”

“Did you check your credit card? Did she check in somewhere else?” David asked.

“Not on our credit card. I suppose she could have paid cash, or used a different card, but she’s also not answering her phone,” he said. “It’s going straight to voicemail now.”

“That’s not like Amelia,” my father-in-law said.

“No, I know. I mean, we’ve had our spats, but she’s never stayed out overnight afterwards,” Matthew said.

“You know the saying ‘you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone’?” David asked, looking pointedly at his son.

“I do,” Matthew said. “What has that to do with anything?”

He took a sip of his coffee and looked at his father.

“I wonder if you know what you have with your wife,” he said to his son. “And I wonder if you appreciate everything she does for you and your family.”

“Of course I do,” Matthew said in defence. “Did she go to your place last night? Is she staying there? Is that why you’re here this morning?”

“I can say with complete honesty that no, she did not come to our house last night. With the way your mother treats her, I would be shocked if we would even be a thought in her mind for refuge of any type. Have you called her brother or her sister?”

“No. I didn’t even think of them,” Matthew rolled his eyes. Of course! My siblings! Why hadn’t he thought of calling them? We had always been close, but we had grown much closer over the past four years since Mom died. “I’ll call them, and get them to have her call me.”

“Don’t be surprised if they are protecting her. Your little stunt of leaving before she got home may have been one of the last straws,” David said.

“What are you talking about?” Matthew asked his father.

“You truly are blind, son. And I am disappointed that you seem to be intent on keeping those blinders on when it comes to your wife. When I called to talk to the twins for their birthday, they mentioned you were at the fireworks and that their mother wasn’t there because she hadn’t bothered to come home from some ridiculous errand, so you all left without her. Not something a loving family does to their matriarch, now is it?”

“She forgot the drink the twins like,” Matthew said. “It’s not like she has a lot to do. It’s her responsibility to get things ready for us while I’m here at work.”

“Your adult children were incapable of getting their own drink at any time during the day?” David asked. “And she’s responsible for everything? When did she become responsible for everything? When did you and the kids stop taking on any responsibilities?”

“The kids are on their summer break. Their job is to rest and relax. It’s not like Amelia works or has anything to do otherwise,” Matthew said.

“And why is that? Why doesn’t Amelia work? I mean, I remember when you two got married and she was the shining star of one of the top law firms in the city. Now she spends her days doing what, exactly?” David asked.

I looked at Matthew to see and hear his response. Oh, Matthew. If only you could see me looking at you. If only you knew I was hearing everything you were saying.

“She keeps herself busy. She’s got the Ladies’ Auxiliary at the golf club, she’s on the board for the kids’ high school, she keeps the apartment in the city clean. She helps out wherever she’s needed,” Matthew said defensively.

“You think that’s fulfilling for her?” David asked his son. Yeah, Matthew. Do you think all this busy work is fulfilling for me?

“She agreed to stay home with the kids. She’s dedicated to them. She’s always made sure that they are well taken care of,” Matthew said.

“And how do you repay her sacrifice?” David asked.

“What do you mean? She’s a wife and a mother. What sacrifice?” Matthew frowned. David looked at his son and shook his head. He stood up and put the empty scotch glass on the coffee table in front of the sofa.

“One day you’ll regret not appreciating what you have. You can’t have it all, Matthew. Just remember that the mother of your children is just as important – no more important – than any other person who could come into your life at any point. I just hope you’re not too late to show the type of appreciation your wife deserves,” David said, and left the office.

Just then, before Matthew could call out and ask his father what he meant, his phone rang. It was a call from the house that Alice had put through. He assumed it was me, coming back home when I knew he’d be gone.

It wasn’t.

“Amelia?” He asked, picking up the extension.

“Sorry, no Dad. It’s me,” Alex said. “Mom’s not home and today is Mrs. Watkins and Ms. Tomlinson’s days off. There’s no breakfast for us.”

“Alex, you’re twenty years old. Tell me you’re not incapable of making yourself something to eat,” Matthew sighed.

“I can, I just wanted to know if you know where Mom is? Her car isn’t here, and she’s not in your room or her study. Or outside. Did she stay at the apartment?” Alex asked.

“Nope. I haven’t heard from your mother, either,” Matthew said.

Alex sighed.

“Is she still having a tantrum because we didn’t wait for her last night?” he asked.

“I honestly don’t know. But don’t worry,” Matthew said. “I’m willing to bet she’ll be home to apologize to us tonight.”

“Oh, hey, did you take the highway downtown this morning?” Alex asked, distractedly.

“I did. Why?” Matthew asked.

“You probably won’t be able to come home. There’s a huge brush fire on the bend before the Almeda exit,” Alex said. “It’s on the news now. No one knows how it started, but it just flared up this morning, apparently. It’s been burning for over an hour now, and they said it flared up really fast.”

“I was just by there around nine fifteen,” Matthew mused. “I didn’t see any smoke or anything.”

“Probably some idiot setting fires because people are dumb and they like to destroy things. Be careful coming home,” Alex said to his father.

“Will do. Do me a favor? Call me if you do hear from your mom today? Anna too, okay?” Matthew said.

Alex sighed.

“Fine,” he said. “Oh, Aunt Seline asked if we could go visit this weekend. Can we? Daryl is supposed to be home from school now.”

“Probably,” Matthew said. “Let me double check on a few things. If I can’t make it with you, you and Anna can go up together if you want.”

“Okay, cool. I’ll call you later. And if I hear from Mom,” Alex said and hung up.

Matthew sat down at his desk finally, and looked over the emails he’d received, did a little research into something to get his petulant wife, who he didn’t even realize was standing right next to him, watching everything he was doing.

He was on the Tiffany & Co. website and found a bracelet he thought I might like.

‘I don’t have much use for that now,’ I said to him. He didn’t hear me. Unsurprisingly. He barely heard me when I was alive. Why would he hear me now that I was gone?

Throughout the day, Matthew kept the news on in the background on the TV in his office. He saw the news clip about the fire on the highway raging out of control. It had grown much bigger and much faster than had been thought when it was first reported. The winds coming up from the ocean and the dryness of the brush in the area had caused the fire to jump the highway and start spreading up the hill from the twisted metal of the broken barrier where my car had punched through. The highway was, of course, closed while fire crews worked to contain and extinguish the raging inferno.

Matthew left the office at four thirty to account for the extra time that driving through the city was going to add to his commute, and for the stop at Tiffany’s that he wanted to make to pick up the bracelet he’d ordered for me.

I shook my head as I sat beside him in his car. He didn’t even know I was there.

I looked at the Tiffany’s bag on the seat and shook my head—such a waste. I wondered if Seline would like the bracelet when Matthew realized he couldn’t give it to me. That I couldn’t accept that gift.

It was six thirty when he pulled into the driveway and opened his garage. He drove in and frowned when he saw my Miata was still not in its spot, but my Range Rover was. He sighed and tried my phone again—voicemail, of course. By now, my phone was a melted and charred ruin, sitting just feet from the remains of a tree and on the banks of a small, but dried, streambed.

“Anyone home?” Matthew called as he came through from the garage.

“Hey, Dad,” Alex called from the den where he was engaged in fighting aliens. Anna breezed in from the pool, wearing a bikini.

“Hi, Daddy,” she smiled as she went upstairs to shower and get dressed.

“Hi, Princess,” Matthew smiled at his daughter. “Your mom didn’t call, did she?”

Anna shrugged and shook her head.

“She didn’t call me,” Anna said. “And I don’t think she called Alex, either. She’s not still mad, is she?”

Anna looked at the teal bag in Matthew’s hand.

“She is still mad, isn’t she?”

“I don’t know,” Matthew frowned. “I haven’t been able to reach her at all today.”

“She’ll get over it. She always does. I’m sure whatever you’ve got there will make her happy. Did Alex tell you about Aunt Seline and Daryl?” Anna asked her father.

“He did. We’ll talk about it over dinner. I don’t see it being a problem, but you two might have to go up alone. I have a lot going on at work,” Matthew said.

“You’re going to pass up a weekend at Aunt Seline’s?” Anna raised her eyebrow.

“He’s probably thinking of ways to apologize to Mom for whatever her problem is now,” Alex smirked from the den doorway. Anna rolled her eyes.

“Not an image I needed to entertain, thank you, Alex,” she cringed. Alex laughed at his sister.

“If your mom isn’t home, I’m guessing no one made dinner?” Matthew said. Both kids shrugged. They wouldn’t have thought to start dinner.

“I’ll order something. What do you guys want?” he asked them.

“Whatever,” they said. “Pizza or chinese are fine.”

Matthew went into the study to see if there was anything there that might give him a clue about where I might be, and to call the restaurant to order delivery.

Chapter 8

Before

“Hey, Mom,” Alex said as he came in from school one chilly December afternoon before the winter break from school. He went straight up to his room without stopping in the study where I was sitting.

“Hi, Mom,” Anna said, also passing right by the study.

“Hello to you two, too,” I called out. “Is that really how you say hi now?”

“Too much homework,” Alex called back.

I sighed.

There was always an excuse. Too much homework, too tired, needing to do things elsewhere.

But the twins are fourteen now, and they have their own lives. We had raised them to be independent, so I suppose I shouldn’t be too upset that they just wanted to get their homework done so they could relax later—no doubt they wanted to get out of their school uniforms, too. I sighed and went over the email that Stella from the golf club had sent.

I’d been attending some of the Ladies’ Auxiliary meetings in the past few months, thinking of maybe getting more involved in the activities of the Auxiliary at the club. I needed things to fill my days.

I heard both kids come back downstairs a little while later and breeze straight through to the kitchen. Mrs. Watkins or Ms. Tomlinson would have a snack ready for them. I was stymied as to why we would still need a nanny for two fourteen-year-olds, but Matthew wasn’t willing to give her up just yet, and it was nice to know there was a responsible adult in the house if Matthew and I wanted a night away or anything.

I hadn’t been thrilled initially when Matthew hired the nanny just days after we got home from the hospital with the babies. That had been his surprise. He’d hired a nanny to care for the children while I recovered from giving birth. And then it was handy having the nanny when the babies had doctors’ appointments and Matthew needed to be at work. I had the extra set of hands to take them to their appointments.

But once the children started school, I wasn’t sure why we were keeping a nanny on. I was home most days when they came home. In fact, it was often I who went to pick them up from school when they were small. It was when they were in the fifth grade that they started asking to take the bus home. Now that they’re in high school, they don’t need Mom to drive them to and from school. They’re too independent for that. And in a couple of years, they’ll be driving. No doubt they’ll drive themselves to school when the time comes.

I responded to Stella’s email and went through the rest of my emails. I read the legal newsletters I subscribed to, checked in on a couple of former colleagues and then shut down the computer.

Sighing, I got up and went into the kitchen where Alex and Anna were sitting at the island, scrolling through their phones while they ate cheese and crackers. I smiled at the two of them, my Prince and Princess.

“How was school?” I asked them.

“Fine,” they both answered in stereo, not looking up from their phones.

I studied them both. Alex was beginning to look a lot more like his father. He had the same chin and the same eyes, and I could see that his babyish features were starting to disappear. I could see in his face the man he would become.

But for now, he was still my baby boy, and his tousled light brown hair fell just above his eyebrows.

“You’re going to need a haircut soon, Alex,” I said, brushing the hair out of his eyes.

He moved his head away and shook it.

“Mom,” he complained. “Leave it.”

I looked over at Anna and took in her features. She was getting tall. Both kids took after their father in that respect. Anna’s hair was the same light brown as her brother’s, and she still had a small button nose and tiny ears. She wore earrings, small hoops, in her lobes and had a small stud on the top part of her ear. Right now, she had her hair pulled up in a messy bun, but she’d had it in a ponytail when she’d come home. She was becoming a beautiful young woman and was also intelligent. Both kids were.

They got both my and Matthew’s work ethic and studied hard.

“School was just ‘fine’?” I asked again.

“Yeah,” Anna said, looking up at me irritatedly. “It was fine. It was school. We had classes, we have homework.”

“Did you learn anything interesting in any of your classes?” I asked.

“No,” Alex said simply.

“Not really,” Anna said. “I’m going to go upstairs and do my homework, then I think I might go for a swim, okay?”

She wasn’t asking permission. She got up and started to leave the kitchen.

“Anna, you can put your plate in the dishwasher,” I said.

“Mrs. Watkins can do it, can’t she? Isn’t that her job?” Anna said.

I had a strong feeling of déjà vu, having had almost this exact conversation with Seline.

“Since when do you rely on others?” I asked. “Is it really so hard to pick up your plate and put it in the dishwasher?”

Anna looked at me with a look of derision, rolled her eyes and stomped back into the kitchen, grabbing her plate and stomping over to the dishwasher.

“There,” she said as she slammed the dishwasher closed. “Happy now?”

“Yes,” I said. “I didn’t raise you to be a spoiled brat who expects others to clean up after them.”

Anna rolled her eyes at me again, turned away and left the kitchen.

“That goes for you too,” I said to Alex.

“Yeah, whatever,” he said, leaving the kitchen.

He had left his plate on the island.

“Alex!” I called after him. I heard his bedroom door slam closed and sighed.

“They’re teenagers,” Mrs. Watkins said, coming up behind me and picking up Alex’s plate to put in the dishwasher. “They’re testing their limits. Just like they did when they were two.”

I smiled.

When the twins were two, they had decided they no longer needed anyone’s help getting them breakfast. Luckily, they didn’t think they could cook, so we didn’t have to deal with burnt food, burnt cookware or burnt children. They’d poured themselves bowls of cereal and milk. However, the milk they’d spilled had gotten under some cabinets, and we’d had to replace them because the smell of spoiled milk permeated the wood.

“Well, that doesn’t change the fact that they are capable of putting their dishes away, Mrs. Watkins,” I said.

“I know. But it’s a small thing. You’re doing well by them. They’ll appreciate you being on top of them. Unfortunately, it’ll be when they’re older, and possibly when they have their own families. But they will eventually appreciate it.”

“I hope so,” I sighed.

Mrs. Watkins continued with her tasks, getting dinner started and leaving me to my own devices. I didn’t really have anything to do, and didn’t know what to do with myself. I thought I’d call my husband and see how his day has been going. Christmas was coming, and we hadn’t decided what we were going to do. We had toyed with the idea of going to an island for the holiday. But we hadn’t booked or planned anything specific.

“What do you want?” Matthew answered, sounding exasperated.

“If it’s a bad time, I can call back later,” I frowned. “Or wait until you come home.”

“I won’t be home tonight,” Matthew said simply. “We have clients in town and we’re taking them out for dinner. I’ll be staying at the apartment at least for tonight.”

“I could meet you at the apartment,” I suggested.

“No,” he said, quickly. “Sorry, no. I don’t know what time we’ll be done with dinner, and I have to be back for a meeting at seven in the morning. You could be waiting until well after midnight and then I’m up and out early. It’s not fair to you.”

I had a feeling I knew who the ‘client’ he’d be ‘entertaining’ really was. But I’d learned long ago that questioning Matthew on his ‘business responsibilities’ was a step too far over the line.

“I was hoping we could discuss Christmas,” I said. “We haven’t decided if we’re going to go back to the Caribbean or if you wanted to go somewhere different this year.”

“I thought I told you, I’m taking Alex and Anna to Colorado to ski,” he said. This was news to me.

“You’re taking them to Colorado? Am I not invited?” I asked.

“You don’t ski,” he said. “You wouldn’t have any fun. You’d be stuck in the chalet all day and then we’d be too exhausted from skiing all day to be of much fun or company for you. You can go to the islands if you want. Take your sister.”

“What if I don’t mind sitting in the chalet by myself, reading and waiting to spend the evening with you three?”

“Amelia, you wouldn’t have any fun. Everyone there will be skiing, the kids and I will be exhausted by the end of the day. Honestly, I was thinking how bored you’d be after just a couple of days of doing nothing. Seriously. Call your sister. See if she wants to go away for Christmas, and take her with you.”

“I was hoping to spend the holiday with my family,” I argued.

“Your sister is your family, too, isn’t she?” Matthew said. “Amelia, I don’t have time to argue this with you. I’m sorry I didn’t think that you’d want to come to Colorado to sit in a chalet all day by yourself. Your friends and everything are at home. Or, like I said, you can go to one of the islands and take your sister. Or go alone and have a nice quiet vacation. But I don’t have time to discuss this right now. I have to go into a meeting and you’ve made me late for it.”

He hung up.

I stared at my phone in disbelief.

He’s taking the kids to Colorado to ski? And he specifically planned for me to not join? It made me wonder who was going to join them in Colorado.

I wasn’t naive. I wasn’t stupid. I knew what was happening between Matthew and Seline, no matter how many times Matthew insisted nothing was going on between them. Seline had never remarried after getting divorced when her son, Daryl, was two. At nine, he was a handsome-looking boy. Unfortunately, he was also a lot like his mother.

Matthew came home from ‘late meetings’ or ‘dinner meetings’ with Seline’s perfume lingering around him. He’d brush it off as someone in the office, but it was Seline’s specific perfume that she had been wearing as long as I had known her. It was the same perfume I smelled sometimes when I went to clean the apartment in the city every couple of weeks. It was the same perfume I smelled on his coats and in his car.

I put my phone in my pocket and went upstairs. I could hear music coming from Alex’s room. I smiled. Like his mom, he studied better with music. I had always played music while doing homework from a young age. My kids did the same.

I knocked on Alex’s door first and pushed it open. He was sitting at his desk, his computer open and a textbook in his lap.

“What?” he said, exasperated that I had interrupted him.

“First of all, that was rude,” I said. He rolled his eyes. “Second, your dad won’t be home for dinner. Mrs. Watkins is cooking. Third, I didn’t know you guys were going skiing with your dad over Christmas.”

Alex looked at me with a bored expression.

“Whatever,” he said.

“That’s all you have to say?” I frowned.

“Yeah. Sorry you thought I was rude, I’m not hungry, so I don’t know if I’m even going to eat dinner and yeah, Dad’s taking Anna and I skiing in Colorado. No big deal.”

“No one thought to tell me? Or ask if I wanted to come?” I said.

“You don’t ski. You’d be bored,” Alex said, precisely the way his father had.

“I see,” I said. “I’ll come back and check on you before dinner, and see if you’re hungry.”

“Don’t bother. I’ll come down if I get hungry,” Alex said. He knew dinner would be ready at six thirty.

I closed his door after letting him get back to his homework and knocked on Anna’s bedroom door.

“Yeah?” she called out. I opened her door. She rolled her eyes when she saw it was me. “What?”

“Is everyone in this family in a bad mood today?” I asked.

“No. You interrupted me. What do you want?” Anna said.

“A little respect for starters,” I said, frowning and crossing my arms.

“Mom, I’m trying to get my homework done,” Anna said, annoyed.

“I get it. Dinner will be ready at six thirty. Dad’s staying in the city tonight,” I saw a look flash across Anna’s face that I wasn’t quite sure I could decipher. “And I didn’t know you guys were going skiing with your dad for Christmas.”

“You don’t ski,” she said. “Dad thought you’d be bored all day.”

“So he said. As did your brother. At some point was anyone going to let me know about your plans?”

“Mom,” Anna rolled her eyes. “It’s not a big deal is it? Dad figured you wouldn’t want to come because you’d be bored stuck inside all day and so he didn’t say anything. It’s not like we had plans anyway. Can I get back to my homework?”

Sighing, I closed Anna’s door and went back downstairs by myself.

Anna came down about an hour and a half later, in her bathing suit and breezed through the den out to the pool. Anna had joined the swim team and would practice in the evenings at home between meets and practices at the school.

She came in about an hour later and started to head upstairs.

“Dinner should be ready in about twenty minutes,” I said to her.

“I’m not hungry. Eat without me. I’ll grab something later,” she said, and went upstairs.

I went into the kitchen where Mrs. Watkins was finishing dinner preparations.

“I’m sorry to have wasted your time, Mrs. Watkins. The kids claim they aren’t hungry, and Matthew won’t be coming home tonight,” I said. “So it’s just me for dinner.”

“Well, you need to eat, too. So dinner isn’t a total waste,” she smiled at me. “And the kids can heat some up for themselves later, if they get hungry. I’ll put a couple of plates together for them and leave them in the fridge.”

“You don’t have to do that. They can put plates together themselves,” I said.

“It’s no trouble,” Mrs. Watkins said.

She dished me a plate and was about to put it on the table.

“I’ll just eat at the island,” I said, taking the plate from her. “Why don’t you join me?”

Mrs. Watkins and I sat together in the kitchen, eating the dinner she had lovingly prepared for my family.

I helped her clean up as much as she would let me, anyway. Once done, I went into the den and turned on the TV.

Neither of the kids came downstairs,and I went upstairs to bed early, with nothing else to do. I thought I might take a bath before turning in.

I looked in on both kids, let them know there were plates for them in the fridge, and that I hadn’t made them their snack since they hadn’t had dinner. They could warm that up if they got hungry.

“Mmhm,” Alex waved me off.

“Thanks, Mom,” Anna said, without turning away from her computer.

Sighing, I went to my own room, drew a bath, put in my favourite bath oil and bubble bath and relaxed from my completely stress-free day.

I was asleep before ten o’clock.

Chapter 9

Present

“Amelia, this is ridiculous,” Matthew said to my voicemail. “Call me as soon as you get this message. I don’t know what you’re playing at, and I don’t know what you’re so mad about that you still haven’t come home. I know you’re not staying in the apartment or at the Farino, none of our friends have heard from you, and it’s getting late. I can’t imagine what you’re so mad about that you’d stay out another night, without even giving me an idea of where you are. Look, if you are on your way home, avoid the highway. There’s a brush fire there that they haven’t been able to get under control. It’s closed from the Almeda exit to ours. Be careful, okay? And please call me.”

I’m right here beside you, Matthew. I thought to myself. You just don’t realize it.

I watched as Matthew frowned at his phone. I had never gone more than 24 hours without speaking to him. Even when I was mad. Even after I’d found out Seline had gone on the ‘business trip’. Even after I’d found her bra in the downtown apartment. I hadn’t stopped talking to him then.

“Mom’s still not answering?” Alex asked as he picked up a piece of General Tso Chicken with his chopsticks.

“Nope,” Matthew said.

“That’s not like her,” Anna frowned. “I mean, she’s been mad before, but she’s never ignored us for this long. She must be really pissed. Maybe Tiffany’s isn’t going to cut it this time.”

It’s not, Anna. But not for the reason you’re thinking.

“Did you try Gramma and Grampa’s?” Alex suggested.

“Your grandfather was kind enough to stop by the office today. She didn’t go there last night, and I doubt she would be there now. Your mother and Gramma don’t exactly get along,” Matthew said.

Both kids nodded. They’d seen and heard how their grandmother treated me and how she would speak to me.

“Did you try Aunt Alecia or Uncle Kieran?” Anna suggested.

“Shit!” Matthew said. “I meant to call them this afternoon.”

“She’s probably at Aunt Alecia’s,” Anna said.

Matthew picked up his phone again and searched for my brother’s and sister’s phone numbers.

“Alecia, hi. It’s Matthew,” he said when Alecia picked up. After they’d exchanged a few pleasantries, he got down to what he’d called for.

“Listen, Amelia and I had a stupid little spat last night and she went out to pick something up, or so I thought. But she didn’t come home last night and I haven’t been able to reach her today either. Have you heard from her or is she at your place?”

“She’s not here,” Alecia said. “What did you fight about?”

“It wasn’t really a fight. Barely a disagreement. She forgot to pick something up for Alex and Anna and I asked her to go grab it before we headed to the fireworks last night.”

“Alex and Anna? Your twenty year olds who could have gone to get their own whatever it was?”

“Alecia, I didn’t call to fight with you. I’m trying to find my wife, your sister. I’ve never had her go more than a few hours without contacting me or the kids and none of us have heard from her since last night.”

“Well, she didn’t come here. Not that I’d tell you if she had if she’s this mad at you. But I’m not covering for her. She isn’t here. Have you called Kieran?” She asked.

“He’s my next call,” Matthew said.

“Well, I can say that I haven’t heard from either of them today. So if she’s with Kieran and Emily, they haven’t said anything to me. Call me if you figure it out, okay? I’ll keep trying her phone.”

“Her phone is going straight to voicemail,” Matthew said. “I don’t know if she’s turned it off or if it died.”

“Or she blocked your number,” Alecia said.

“Or that,” Matthew sighed.

“Well, I’ll call you if I hear from her, but I haven’t,” Alecia said.

“Thanks. I’m going to call Kieran now,” Matthew said.

He hung up and scrolled through, looking for Kieran’s number. He pressed the contact, not looking forward to the conversation.

Even after all these years, my brother had never warmed up to Matthew.

“Matthew,” Kieran said when he answered. Matthew swallowed hard.

“Hey, Kieran. How’s it going?” Matthew said.

“Fine. You don’t call unless you need something from me. So cut the pleasantries. What do you want?”

“So, Amelia and I…” he started.

“What did you do to my sister?” Kieran asked. “Alecia just texted me saying to expect your call and that it’s about Amelia.”

Matthew took a deep breath.

“We had a little spat last night and she didn’t come home. I don’t know exactly what she’s so mad at me for, but I haven’t been able to reach her all day and her phone is going to voicemail. I was wondering if she was at your place, or if you’d heard from her?”

“She isn’t here and no, I haven’t heard from her,” Kieran said. Matthew heard him turn away from the phone and talk to someone before coming back.

“Emily said she hasn’t spoken to her either, and that she sent her a text about the baby yesterday that she hadn’t responded to.”

Kieran and his wife, Emily, were expecting their first child, and Emily had been asking me for advice. I loved my sister-in-law. She was so sweet and funny, and she was smart, too. She was definitely able to keep up with my brother.

“Should I be worried, Matthew? Because it’s not like my sister to disappear and not talk to anyone.” Kieran said.

“She’s just angry about something. She’s probably gone somewhere to clear her head and doesn’t want to be disturbed. Maybe she’s turned her phone off to avoid distractions,” Matthew suggested.

“Or she’s turned it off to avoid you. What did you fight about?” Kieran asked, accusingly.

“It wasn’t really a fight. I asked her to go pick something up that she forgot to get for the kids yesterday and she didn’t get home before we needed to leave for the fireworks,” Matthew said.

“So it was Colorado again?” Kieran asked.

“It wasn’t anything like Colorado,” Matthew fumed. “We waited as long as we could. And when she called I told her to just come meet us at the show.”

“So you did speak to her last night?” Kieran asked.

“Briefly. She called during the fireworks and we were annoyed she hadn’t shown up yet. It’s maybe twenty minutes back and forth if she took the highway to the store. But she’s being petulant and didn’t show up,” Matthew explained.

“My sister is anything but petulant,” Kieran said. That’s my baby brother! Always sticks up for his big sister.

“Well, she is today. Can you just call me if you hear from her? You don’t even have to tell me where she is. Just let me know if she’s okay, okay?”

“If I hear from her, I’ll consider it. But so you know, neither Emily nor I have heard from her today. And you’d better hope she is okay, Matthew,” Kieran warned Matthew.

“I’m sure she’s fine. She’s just letting off steam. I’ll call you if she turns up tonight. Can you let me know if you hear from her?”

Kieran sighed.

“Yeah. I will. As long as you let me know the minute you hear from her or she comes home.”

“I will, I promise,” Matthew said.

Oh Matthew. Don’t make promises you can’t keep.

“No luck?” Alex asked as Matthew put down his phone.

“They haven’t heard from her either,” Matthew told the kids.

“Aunt Seline asked if you checked the apartment,” Anna said, looking at her phone. Anna, baby, you have to know Seline is the last person I would ever go to if I’d had a spat with your dad. I’d go to your grandparents’ before I’d seek solace with her.

“She wouldn’t go to Seline,” Matthew said, looking at his phone and contemplating who else to call or where to check next.

“I know,” Anna said. “I just thought Aunt Seline might have some ideas we hadn’t thought of yet.”

“The apartment was the first place I tried. Then the Farino. Unless she’s checked in with a credit card I don’t know about, she hasn’t used ours all day. Not since before she left last night,” Matthew said.

Anna and Alex looked at each other and shrugged.

“What about her roommate? The one that moved here last month? Carrie? Callie? Maybe she went there because it’s the absolute last place you’d probably think of,” Alex suggested.

“I don’t have her phone number. But that’s a good thought. I just have no way of contacting her. But, you’re probably right. She’s probably there. We’ll give her her space. She’ll come back when she’s ready,” Matthew said.

No, I won’t.

My family continued eating, the kids scrolling on their phones, Matthew looking through his, trying to think about who else might have an idea where I could be.

I’m so close, Matthew. You’re just not looking hard enough.

“Hello?” A voice rang through the house. Alex, Anna and Matthew’s heads all shot up, thinking, for a fleeting second, that I had come back home.

“Oh. You guys are in here,” Seline said, breezing into the kitchen where Matthew and the kids were still sitting and eating.

“What are you doing here?” Matthew frowned at Seline. “And how did you get in?”

“Anna texted me and told me Amelia wasn’t home and you didn’t know where she went. I came to see if I could help in any way.”

“Now is really not a good time Seline,” Matthew said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

It was the first time I had ever heard him speak like that – so shortly – to his precious Seline.

“Matty,” Seline pouted. “I came to help. Anna seemed worried in her text.”

“Seline, please,” Matthew breathed.

“Don’t worry, Aunt Seline,” Alex said. “We figured out where she is. Sorry if we worried you.”

“I’m sorry I worried you, Aunty Seline,” Anna said, hugging my nemesis. And quite possibly, my replacement. Once they did figure out what happened to me.

“So, where is she?” Seline asked. “Did you speak to her?”

“She’s at her old roommate’s,” Alex said, scrolling through his phone again. I barely warranted five words.

“Oh, so you did speak to her. Is she okay? What was she all upset about this time?” Seline asked. I almost heard some compassion and concern in her voice.

“We didn’t speak to her, Aunty Seline,” Anna said. “We just figured out that’s where she must be. She didn’t stay in the apartment, she didn’t stay at the Farino and she didn’t use any of their credit cards to check into a hotel. She didn’t stay with any of Mom and Dad’s friends’ places, and definitely not Gramma and Grampa’s.”

“No, I would think not,” Seline said. “What about your aunt and uncle?”

“We called them. She didn’t call either of them, either. We figured where would she go where we would be the least likely to be found? Callie just moved to town, and we’ve only met her briefly. None of us have her number and we don’t know where she lives. Mom’s phone isn’t going through, so we can’t find her that way. So, it’s obvious. She went to Calllie’s,” Anna explained.

Seline looked at Anna and then at Matthew.

“That makes sense,” Seline nodded. “So you know she’s safe and now all you have to do is wait for her to finish having her little temper tantrum and come running back home. You’re a saint to put up with her, Matty.”

“That’s my wife you’re talking about, Seline,” Matthew warned.

I was gobsmacked. Flabbergasted. My gasts had been flabbered, and my smacks had been gobbed. I can’t remember when Matthew last stood up for me with Seline. With anybody.

“Oh, Matty. Come on. You know you only married her to spite your mother. You know our parents hoped we’d get together. And we still could. You could divorce Anita for this stupid stunt she’s pulling. I mean, how many years have you been dealing with these little snits and temper tantrums. My god, the twins didn’t have temper tantrums as often as your wife does,” Seline sneered.

“My wife’s name is Amelia, Seline. I know you know that. And I love my wife. I love my wife very much. And not knowing where she is, not being able to contact her is not an invitation for you to badmouth her. I don’t know where you get off thinking you’re superior to Amelia. She’s twice the woman, hell, ten times, a thousand times the woman you’ll ever be,” Matthew sneered at her.

Remember how I said I was gobsmacked and flabbergasted? If I weren’t already dead, I think this might have killed me. I don’t think my heart would have been able to handle hearing what I had hoped to hear from my family for twenty years.

“Aunt Seline, don’t talk bad about our mom,” Anna said. “I know you two don’t like each other, but she’s our mom.”

Seline looked between Matthew and the kids. Even Alex was sitting up and paying attention, his arms crossed against his chest, and he had a slight scowl. It reminded me a little of that little frown he had the day he was born. I smiled, remembering the baby he was, the toddler he grew into, and this handsome young man.

“Alright, alright, I’m sorry,” Seline held her hands up in surrender. “For what it’s worth, I was worried when you said you hadn’t heard from her all day. I know you hear from her at least twice a day. So for her to have not come home, that’s kinda bitchy, but I don’t know how badly you pissed her off. Or maybe it was cumulative.”

“Seline, thank you for your concern, but please, go home? I really don’t need extra stress. Hopefully, Amelia will calm down in a day or so, and we’ll hear from her. But for now, please. Go home,” Matthew said, leaning on the kitchen island.

“Okay, I’ll go. But do let me know when you hear from her and know that she really is okay. Okay?” Seline said. She did sound concerned, and even her voice was shaking a little.

Matthew nodded, and Seline blew kisses at the kids and left.

Matthew stood up, rubbed his face with his hands and sighed.

“I’m going to go take a shower, do some work up in my room and turn in early. You two clean up the dinner stuff, and do whatever, but keep it quiet. Wake me up if you hear from your mom, though. Okay?” Matthew said.

“Can’t Mrs. Watkins clean this tomorrow?” Alex whined. I frowned. I hoped Matthew would try to instill the lessons I’ve been trying to teach them.

“Put the leftovers away, toss the food on your plates in the garbage and put the dishes in the dishwasher. Run a warm cloth over the island. Mrs. Watkins can do a deeper clean tomorrow, but she is not coming back from her day off to clean up hours old food. You’re twenty years old, Alex. You are capable of a little work, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” my son mumbled. Anna nudged him and smirked.

“Come on, I’ll help you,” she said. Alex smirked back at her, and they got to work together.

I sighed. I was happy that Matthew had upheld what I’d tried to instill. My only wish was that I could have seen this while I was alive.

Chapter 10

Before

“I’ve called you both in today to discuss Alex’s grades,” the student advisor in front of us was saying.

Report cards had come out last week and Alex’s grades were not what we expected from him.

Alex and Anna were in their junior year at Masterson and while Anna was doing well, Alex was struggling a little bit. His grades weren’t terrible. But they weren’t what we knew he was capable of.

“Where does he seem to be struggling the most?” Matthew asked, frowning.

“His grade has dropped a little in Social Studies and significantly in Law and Society,” the advisor said. “He’s not at risk of any academic suspensions or penalties yet, but we want to nip this in the bud before it becomes a bigger issue.”

“We appreciate that,” Matthew nodded.

I reached out for his hand, which he had laid on the arm of his chair. It had been two days since I’d seen him in person. Davenport Industries was growing and once again, Matthew was in the middle of a big merger and had been working late nights and staying at the apartment. My plan was to go there after this meeting to do my biweekly housekeeping.

Matthew pulled his hand away as soon as mine touched his. I placed my own hand back in my lap and sighed.

“You both know we help our students achieve their very best here at Masterson Academy. Our students often go on to Ivy League educations. We have graduated doctors, lawyers, politicians, industry leaders and even a vice president,” the advisor was saying.

Spare us the sales pitch, I thought to myself. The kids have been going here since kindergarten.

“And it’s because we have such high standards for our students that we try to turn any issues a student might be having with their coursework around before they become an issue that can’t be easily remedied. In Alex’s case, boredom seems to be at the heart of his Law and Social Studies grade. It’s not because he isn’t challenged enough, but he seems to be putting in less effort. And we want to turn that around before we have to consider suspensions,” the advisor said.

“What do you mean by suspension?” Matthew frowned. “From school?”

“Not initially. The first course of action would be athletic suspension,” the advisor said. I realized I hadn’t caught his name when we came into the office.

“Alex is the first string catcher on your school baseball team. You don’t want to suspend him in the middle of a banner season, do you?” Matthew asked.

“We don’t want to suspend any student for any reason,” the advisor said. “However if Alex’s grades continue to fall, and if it starts to affect his other grades, we may have to consider a suspension. Unless he can get these grades turned around.”

“Well,” Matthew said, frowning. “We will definitely be having a word with our son tonight and incan assure you, you will see a vast improvement in his grades.”

The advisor smiled.

“I figured you would handle this appropriately,” the advisor said. “Alex and Anna are among some of our best and brightest students. They’re both class leaders, excellent academics, usually, and quite honestly, impart the values we instill here at Masterson Academy. You should be very proud of them both.”

He smiled at us. I smiled back. Matthew’s face remained stolid.

“Thank you,” he said to the advisor. “And thank you for bringing this to our attention. We will talk with Alex tonight and come up with a plan to get his grades back up.”

“I have no doubt Alex can turn this around before the next reporting period in March,” the advisor said.

Matthew stood up, so I took that as my cue to get up as well.

“Alex really is a great kid,” the advisor said, also standing and extending his hand for Matthew to shake. He took the man’s hand and shook it once. The advisor extended his hand to me and I shook his hand lightly, as well.

“Thank you,” I said. He nodded at me.

I followed Matthew out of the office. Alex was sitting on a bench outside the office, looking sullen.

“How much trouble am I in?” he asked Matthew.

“Not as much as you think, and not as much as I was prepared for. Your grades in Social Studies and Law and Society are slipping. You have four months to bring those grades up according to the school. If they’re not back up by the end of the winter break, you’ll give me your car keys until they are,” Matthew said.

“That’s not fair!” Alex cried. “That’s only six weeks!”

“I would assume between now and then, you’ll have at least one test in each class. And at least one paper. I expect As on those tests and papers. You’re smart, Alex. There’s no excuse for these grades,” Matthew replied. “You’ll be spending the Thanksgiving break studying.”

“I was going to hang out with Justin and Elton!” Alex complained.

“And now you’re going to spend it in your room, studying,” Matthew said. His tone left no room for argument. “Now get back to class.”

Alex looked at me for a minute, frowned and then looked at his father. He turned around and stormed away. Matthew watched him go, then turned to walk out of the school. I followed.

In the parking lot, Matthew turned on me.

“How could you let his grades get so low?” he growled at me.

“Me?” I asked, shocked at the accusation. “I’m not the student, Matthew.”

“You’re his mother, aren’t you? I don’t ask a lot of you, but keeping up with the kids’ education is kind of your job, Amelia! It’s not like you have much going on otherwise!”

“And you’re his father, Matthew,” I reminded him.

“I work, Amelia. I can’t keep up with their school issues and run a company. That’s your job. Remember? The kids are your job! How did you not realize his grades were slipping? Do you not talk with them,ever?”

“That’s not fair, and you know it. We have two teenagers. You spend hours with him on weekends playing catch, working on his technique, his batting, his throwing. Have you not discussed school with him at any point? When did all the responsibilities fall to me? Did you want me to become his father as well as his mother? Take all the responsibilities from you and you can just enjoy being praised for having good kids without putting in the effort?”

“Amelia, you are home every day with them. From now on, starting today, you are going to tutor Alex and help him get his grades up. If you can’t handle that, we’ll find a tutor,” Matthew said. He then checked his watch and rolled his eyes. “I have a meeting I’m going to be late for. I want to see those grades improve in the next six weeks, Amelia.”

He got into his car, started it and drove off before I had a chance to process what he’d just said. I felt like I was the one failing Law and Society and Social Studies. I stared after Matthew’s car as he drove out through the school gates. How had I become the villain in this story?

Sighing, I got into my own car and drove home.

“Good afternoon, Ms. Amelia,” Mrs. Watkins smiled at me as I came into the kitchen.

“Hi, Mrs. Watkins,” I said.

“How was the meeting at the school?” She asked. I sighed.

“It was fine. Alex’s grades are slipping a little, so we’re going to have to be more on top of him and make sure he’s studying. Or should I say I have to be more on top of him and make sure he’s studying?”

“Which classes?” Mrs. Watkins asked.

“Social Studies and Law and Society,” I sighed.

“Well, the law course should be easy enough for you to help him with,” she smiled. I offered a slight smile back.

“Will the children be home from school today as usual or do they have any practices?” Mrs. Tomlinson asked, coming into the kitchen. She never said hello, and she never addressed me by my name.

“Anna has swim practice, but Alex should be home at his usual time,” I said. She nodded and left the kitchen to go do whatever it is she does before the kids come home.

I don’t understand why we still have a nanny for sixteen year olds. We don’t even stay in the apartment in the city together anymore anyway. It’s been a while since I’ve stayed there. Just my cleaning visits every couple of weeks.

Yesterday I had gone to the apartment to throw out any of the food that had expired and to change the linens in the bedrooms. Matthew had been spending a few more nights a week there recently.

And I knew that he wasn’t spending those nights alone. Seline’s synthetic rose smelling perfume permeated the bedsheets.

I wasn’t surprised. I’d suspected he was having an affair with her for ages. Years, in fact. But I didn’t say anything. I never had any concrete proof. Just the fact that I’m not stupid, and I know that Davenport Industries is not in the process of any big merger or any big deals that would require Matthew to stay downtown. He was just choosing to spend the time in the apartment rather than come home. It wasn’t that I was accepting of what was going on literally right under my nose. It was that I just didn’t have it in me to fight about it anymore. The kids were 16. Another few years they’d be in college and once they graduated, I’d think about ending my marriage. I didn’t want to disrupt their lives more than necessary. Once they were out of school, once Matthew and I didn’t have to put on an act of a happily married couple in public, I would take my leave. Maybe go back to work. I had kept my license current and had taken courses to keep my knowledge current. The only thing I hadn’t done was practice law.

I was contemplating my life when the front door opened and slammed shut.

“Alex?” I called out, checking the time.

“What?” he called back.

“In the kitchen. Come here,” I said.

He slunk into the room looking annoyed.

“What?” he asked.

“Why didn’t you tell me, or your dad, you were having trouble with Social Studies and Law? We could have helped you before it got to us being called into a meeting about it.”

“Why do you even care?” he asked, accusatorily.

“Alex, of course I care. I’m your mother. I want you to be successful and I know you’re smart. It’s not like you to let your grades slip and not say anything,” I said. “Is it the coursework? Extracurriculars that are taking time away from studying?”

“It’s fine, Mom. I’ll figure it out,” he said.

“Let’s go over your law classwork together. I can help you,” I said. “Get your book out, and show me what you’re doing.”

Alex rolled his eyes but slunk into the kitchen, tossed his backpack on a chair and pulled out his Law and Society textbook. I smiled. It was the textbook I had written with my former professor and mentor back when the children were babies. It had taken a total of three years to research and write, get edited, updated, and then we’d had to produce an updated version about five years ago after a couple of legislative changes that the Supreme Court had made. Alex had the new version.

“I know this book,” I said. “I…”

“Yeah yeah. You used the same ancient textbook as we are. Blah blah. Here,” he said turning to the chapter his class was currently studying.

“Sit down,” I said, as I sat at the table and flipped through the chapter. It was an easy chapter on tort law. I asked to see his notes.

“I didn’t take any,” he said. “The class is boring.”

“But it’s an important class, Alex. If you don’t take notes during the class, how are you going to understand the concepts?”

“By reading?” he said, as though that were the most obvious thing.

“Sure, reading the text is fine, but what about the concepts behind the text? Doesn’t your teacher go deeper into the concepts?”

“I guess,” Alex mumbled, looking at his phone. He laughed, presumably at something a friend had sent.

“Can you please concentrate on this for now? Your dad is upset about your grades and unless you want to repeat the eleventh grade, you might want to put some effort in,” I frowned.

“What do you even know about this stuff?” Alex said, accusingly. “You’re a stay-at-home-mom. You can’t possibly understand this stuff.”

My jaw dropped. At no point in the past 16 years had Alex seen my law degree on the wall in my study? Did he think it was just a piece of art?

“Alex,” I started.

“Forget it,” he said, grabbing his textbook and backpack. “I can study this crap in my room. Google is a thing, you know. It knows more about this than you do, I’m sure.”

He stormed out of the kitchen, went upstairs and slammed his bedroom door. I stared after him.

I’d have Matthew talk to him tonight. Provided Matthew actually came home tonight.