Summary

Levi Wren and Venny Romano have been best friends since middle school. Venny is the best baseball player for his high school in Houston Texas. Many women want him, many men envy him. Levi is the school’s bad boy with a heart of gold. They’ve always played sports together, partied together, and both crushed over the same girls. Their relationship has always been a friendly one until Venny tells Levi a secret he has been hiding for a long time. Venny has never told anyone, and since Levi is his best friend, he figures it wouldn’t be a problem. That secret is that Venny is gay. Little does Venny know Levi is also discovering his sexuality, and soon they’ll discover it together. Will they give in to each other? *** “Alice is cool and all, but there is no other place I’d rather be than in a vomit stench room with my drunk best friend as I remind him how great he is,” Levi says so genuinely that my heart swells. “You mean that?” “Every word. Now drink.” I drink the water, before laying down next to him with only inches between us. “I don’t deserve you,” I whisper and I’m surprised to feel his warm hand reach down to hold mine. “Levi what are you d…” “Shhh.” He says as his fingers rub mine soothingly. “Just shhh. Shut your eyes and rest.” He says as he intertwined his fingers with mine and shuts his eyes as if this was the most natural thing in the world.

(1) Venny

“Damn Levi, who pissed in your cereal this morning?” My mother Sarah asks me in her southern bell, Texan accent as she looks at me curiously.

Yeah, I’m mad this morning, and the reason for that is blowing up my phone with a bunch of “sorry,” messages.

“Aria stood me up again last night. I just don’t understand. If she doesn’t want to be with me, why doesn’t she just tell me?” I ask frustrated as I butter my bagel aggressively.

“Well, maybe she’s just not sure how she feels about you yet, and if that’s the case, you deserve someone who is sure about you sweetheart,” Mom says as she pours me coffee, and pushes her blond and gray hair behind her ear.

“You’re right mom.”

“You’re damn right I am. I want you to be happy Levi. And I’m telling you, that Aria chick isn’t it.”

I sigh as I grab the coffee mug.

“Then who the hell is mom? I’m already 18, in my senior year of high school, and still haven’t found the one. It’s frustrating.”

She nods and smiles at me.

“What?”

“You are such a romantic, that’s why it’s so frustrating to you isn’t it?”

I shrug.

“I’ve never really thought of it that way. Love is a great thing and all, but it’s never really happened to me.”

“It will Levi, you just have to stop trying and just let it come to you when it’s time.”

I groan and roll my eyes.

“Oh, mom please don’t start with that destiny stuff.”

She giggles as she pours her coffee.

“It’s a real thing you know. Love at first sight, definitely isn’t, but destiny? That’s much bigger than anyone. Everyone has a unique one.”

She always has the wisest things to say, to make me feel better. I place a kiss on my mom’s head.

“Thanks, mom, and if I am a romantic, it’s quite obvious I got from you,” I tell her and her smile grows.

“I know, now hurry before you become late for first period again.” She says as she pushes me towards the door.

As I get to home economics, a second before the bell goes off, I sit next to my best friend Venny. I noticed he has cut his 7-inch long hair and is now rocking a fade with a 2-inch hair at the top. I can’t deny that it suits his nice face. Yeah, I can admit my best friend has a nice face.

“Hey man. Nice haircut,” I tell him and he looks away from his phone to give me a smile. His blue eyes smiling as well. I don’t know if it’s weird to think this about my best friend, but he looks like he has the softest skin. Okay yeah, that was definitely weird.

“Thanks, I figured the second semester is right around the corner and I wanted a change for once.”

“Sounds to me, you’re trying to impress someone. So come on, tell me who the lucky lady is.” I tell him as I smack his shoulder. He chuckles with a slight blush before shaking his head.

“Perhaps I’m just doing this for me, Levi.”

I narrow my eyes at him and he looks down at his phone again.

“Venny… Come on man. You have been single for a whole year now, and you say you have hooked up, and whatever, but I’ve known you all your life. You’re not the hookup type. Are you hiding a girlfriend from your best friend?” I ask him and he rolls his eyes.

“No Levi.”

“What? Are you afraid I might sweep her up myself?”

He sighs and puts his phone down.

“I’m not seeing anyone. Not since Norah.”

Norah was his girlfriend last year. They seemed like the perfect couple but they never looked to be in love. They just looked like good friends. He runs a hand through his hair and looks back at his phone.

“Do you want to hang out after school? Play some video games and what not?” I ask him and he nods facing me.

“If by, play some video games, you mean me wining every single game, then count me in.”

Oh, a challenge. Me likely.

“Okay Mr. Cocky, let’s make this a bet. If I win most games tonight, you have to be one hundred percent honest with me with whatever question I ask you, and if you win, you can ask me a question.”

He arches an eyebrow at me.

“Why are you suddenly so interested in asking me questions Levi?”

“Don’t worry about it, are you game?”

He shrugs.

“Yeah, I’m game.”

***

Venny POV:

Levi and his stupidly handsome face are acting suspicious about me acting suspiciously. He can’t possibly know, and it has to be that way. I’m not ready to tell him the truth. Hell, I haven’t even told my parents yet.

Last year I dated one of the hottest girls in school and I lost my virginity to her. It never felt right between Norah and me as a couple. But dating her has taught me a whole fucking lot.

I love dick.

And my best friend? Well, he wouldn’t understand.

Sometimes I look at Levi’s face and my stupid mind wonders what if he was Gay too? Would we be together? I’m a guy who as of now only gets by with fantasies, porn, and my very vivid dreams.

Not of Levi, of course, but of men… that would just be weird… right? RIGHT.

Someone taps on my shoulder and I turn to face Levi.

“Sup?”

He holds up his phone showing me some kind of text message, with an excited look on his face.

“We just got invited to Sam Miller’s birthday party this weekend. please tell you don’t have plans.”

Little does Levi know, I actually, strongly disliked Sam Miller after bullying a gay kid in the first year of high school.

That gay kid was me.

We were playing baseball and he thought I was staring at his ass, even though I wasn’t even looking at him. He called me out in front of his buddies and said a bunch of tasteless gay jokes, then they jumped me after school.

Sam told me the day after, that he knew I wasn’t gay, but that he had a lot of fun beating me up anyways. Levi doesn’t know this, I was too embarrassed.

“Actually I do have plans. Sorry, Levi.”

“And what plans are those?”

“Avoiding that pussy fart, Sam.”

Levi cocks an eyebrow at me before cracking up.

“Well damn, I knew you didn’t like the guy very much, but I didn’t know you hated him.”

I shrugged trying to play it off.

“He’s not my favorite person, but I know you’re going to go anyways, and I guess if you want me to be there…”

“Yes!” He says before I even get the words out. The things I do for him.

“Hey, you two in the back. Be quiet and get your work done.” The teacher scolds us with a finger pointed at us.

After Class, I spot Aria and Levi flirting by the lockers. For fucks sakes. Aria keeps messing things up with him, but he somehow always accepts her back.

He deserves better. Much better.

“Hey, y’all.”

“Hey, Venny. Levi and I were just talking and we were wondering if you and a date, would want to double date with Levi and me?” She suggests twirling her blond hair.

“Sounds great Aria, but you know the double date only works if you show up.” I shoot at her and she looks down embarrassed.

“Venny, chill, Alright? She’s coming and it’s gonna be fun.” Levi tells me with a warning in his eyes, and I meet him dead on.

“Alright. When it is?”

“Tomorrow,” Aria says quickly, excited.

“You want me to find a date in one day?” I ask Levi and he shrugs.

“Shouldn’t be too hard. You’re a baseball player with a good body, good hair, good personality, and a babyface. You’ll find a date in no time.” Levi says gently smacking my face as he walks Aria outside.

Did… did he just admit I’m a catch? I ask myself as I touch my cheek, and watch them walk out. I know he just said it in a friendly way but…

“Hey Venny, heads up man!” Lionel Ramirez, the best player on the baseball team, and the best player in general throws a baseball ball at me from across the hall and I catch it effortlessly.

“Nice!” He says as he walks towards me and bro hugs me. He’s my second best friend.

“Thanks, are you coming to practice today after school?” I ask him and he squints his eyes at me.

“Duh Venny, the game is next week and we need to be at our best. The couch also wants us to work out a bit, and eat only healthy food starting today.”

I nod with a smile.

“Sounds great, I’ll see you later.”

“Damn right, I’ll be the one kicking baseball ass.”

That cocky mother fucker. Haha, lionel is pretty cool though, which is why he’s so popular, more so than Sam. Although he has the player personality down, he’s admitted he’s only ever been with four women total. However I’m the only person who knows that. Ever since he’s gotten his heart broken in freshman year, he’s pretty much just settled to being a flirt.

“You’re Puerto Rican, and your last name is Ramirez, no shit you’re good at baseball,” I tell him and he holds a hand over his heart. In a joking way as Kyle, another baseball player walks up behind him and smacks a hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t stroke his ego too much Venny, he might come all over this hall,” Kyle says laughing as he walks away and Lionel flicks him off.

“Anyhow, I should get going, later Venny.” He says as he walks past me and winks at a preppy girl in heals. She giggles and waves at him.

As I make my way to math class I spot Aria talking to some guy, I don’t realize who it until his face comes into view. It’s fucking Sam, and his punchable face.

Then I see something has me wanting to strangle him. He kisses her briefly on the lips before she scurries away with a small smile on her face.

That bitc…

“Hey, get to class!” An elderly teacher yells at everyone who is still in the hallway but my eyes are burning a hole through the back of Sam’s head as he walks away with his casual demeanor.

***

*Hey, if you’re reading this, thank you for choosing to read this love story. It will definitely take you on an emotional roller coaster ride that I hope you will enjoy by the end of it.

Also make sure to comment, because I love interacting with you all, and seeing how you like the book as you continueto read it.* – Arabella.

(2) Cut the shit

Levi POV:

“Alright, calmly explain what happened, dude, you aren’t making any sense,” I tell Venny as he stands in my bedroom looking pissed off.

“Sam. Kissed. Your. Girlfriend.”

“He what?!”

“Seriously Levi, I’m about this close to investing in some hearing aids for you.”

I get out of bed quickly and throw a white t-shirt over my red sweatpants. The plan tonight was to just relax and play video games, but now, I’m fucking livid and I’m not even thinking about my actions as I grab my keys from the nightstand, grab Venny’s hand, and drag him with me towards the front door.

“I’ll be back home later mom! Don’t wait up!” I yell to her as she cooks. And we leave before she says anything.

“Where are we going?” Venny asks me as I get in my truck and I start it up.

“To Sam’s house. Aria told me she couldn’t hang out with me tonight because she is having a slumber party with one of her friends. I’m assuming that ‘friend’ is Sam.”

He looks nervous as he buckles his seatbelt.

“What are we going to do if she’s there with him?”

“I’m going to knock his lights out, and break up with her. Easy.” For me it technically is. I used to practice MMA with my father before he remarried and started a new family.

“Okay, but you are not going in alone,” Venny says and I sigh.

Venny is strong, he’s got an athletic body, he’s fast on his feet, he’s agile, but he doesn’t have enough rage in his pure angel-like soul to fight a guy like sam.

“Just let me handle most of it Alright?” He groans frustrated but nods.

Soon we arrive at the fancy part of town and I drive up to Sam’s house. I March my way up to his door with Venny by my side and knock on the door softly. If I knock hard, they are going to know it’s me and that will give Aria time to hide.

The door opens and Aria stands there looking down and chuckling before her eyes met mine and she looks horrified.

“Um… Hey baby, what are you doing here?”

“Cut the shit Aria. Were over, now where’s the man of the hour?”

She silently opens the door further and Sam stands there looking on edge as he clenches his fist.

“Hey Aria, I think that is your cue to get out of the way,” Venny tells her in a salty way and she rolls her eyes before stepping past us and getting in her car.

“Well hello boys, came to pay your favorite Jock a visit, or are you just going to stand there?”

Without any more hesitation, I walk towards him and punch him square in the face. Blood drips to the ground as he recovers and swings back missing me.

“You fucking, ass wipe!” I push him against the wall where I punch him again and he holds his nose.

“It’s not my fault she prefers me over your sorry ass.” He spits out and as I’m about to punch him again Venny holds me back.

“I think he’s got the message Levi, let him go.”

“Yeah, listen to your boyfriend Levi, I’m sure if you feel bad he could get in bed with you instead, isn’t that right Venny?”

I shrug Venny off of me before kicking Sam in his nuts.

“That’s for being a homophobic piece of shit. Venny isn’t Gay, but my mother is lesbian and if she were here right now she would approve of a nice crotch kick.”

Sam groans loudly as he holds his crotch.

“Now we can go,” I tell Venny who seems to be in total shock. I grab him by the arm and haul him out of the house.

Maybe I overreacted, but I couldn’t see past the color red.

We get in the car and peel off. I slam my hand on the wheel pissed off and Venny sighs.

“I didn’t know your mother was a lesbian.” He says after a while of silent tension.

“She’s not technically out of the closet yet, but that’s the reason for my parent’s divorce,” I say as I turn on the radio trying not to have any conversation at the moment, but then Venny stubbornly turns it back down.

“Venny, I really don’t want to talk about…”

“So apparently I’m not the only one keeping secrets in this friendship. You do realize that time you were depressed when your parents split you could have talked to me, and trusted me.”

“I know alright? But that was long ago. Right now I just want to have a drinking buddy, is that okay?”

He nods with a half-smile.

“Do you plan on going to the bar in sweat pants?”

“Nah, I’ll go home and get dressed. You could borrow any of my clothing if you want to change too, not that you don’t look like a heartbreaker already.” I comment and I don’t miss the way his cheeks flush, and he fidgets with his fingers.

What’s that all about?

“Thanks, but maybe I will borrow one of your leather jackets to look a bit cooler, or whatever.” He tells me and I nod.

“Sure man.”

As we get into the house mom calls out to me.

“Hey boys, where are you head off to? You sounded a bit upset before you left Levi.” She says as she comes out of the kitchen with her hands on her hips.

“Just to a friend’s house,” I tell her before kissing her on the cheek and walking into the kitchen.

“Oh, okay well, the food is ready if you two are hungry. I’m going out with my friends tonight, mama needs some social time.” She says with a shiny as she makes her way to her bedroom.”

“Well, that works out perfectly. We will wait till mom leaves to head to the bar. You still have that fake ID don’t you?” I ask Venny and he smirks at me before pulling it out of his wallet and waving it around.

“I never leave home without it.”

“Great, because we’re getting shit faced tonight.”

“Don’t you have to work tomorrow?” He asks and yes I do work this Saturday at the restaurant, but I fake a sneeze.

“Hum… suddenly I’m coming down with something,” I say holding my throat and he laughs. Venny has this kind of laugh that makes you feel better after a shitty day.

“So, you’re in?” I ask him and he nods.

(3) confusing

Venny POV:

As we’re getting changed in Levi’s room I can’t stop my mind from replaying those words he said that made me blush. Sometimes Levi says the sweetest shit out of nowhere, then plays it off.

He’s so damn confusing even though I’ve known him so long.

“Hey Levi, should I wear the Denim jacket or the leather one?” I ask him as he pulls his faded Jean’s up and zips them. I keep my eyes on his face trying not to get a look at his perfect body he got from years of practicing MMA.

He looks at the jackets then back towards my half-naked body and points to the denim one.

“I think denim suits you. It’s not too punk, but it’s also edgy. Leather is my kind of thing.” He says as he puts on a band tee, scoops up the leather jacket, and slips it on.

Damn, he’s right. Leather looks great on him since he’s got the hottest piercings and tattoos on his body. His eyebrow piercing and his lip piercing are my weakness. Shit. I have to get a hold of myself.

He catches me staring and I quickly grab the denim jacket and turn away from him as I put on my undershirt followed by the jacket.

“Oh yeah, we will definitely get lucky tonight. Perhaps we won’t get laid, but… well definitely get some eye candy.” He says as he folds his sleeves up.

Damn him. If only he knew, the only candy I have my eyes set on is forbidden, very, VERY forbidden.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind practicing my flirting tonight.” I lie as he gives me a smirk.

“About time, you put yourself out there again. It seems you haven’t done that since you broke it off with Norah, did she break your heart or something?”

I shake my head.

“No, of course not, it’s just…” Shit, I can’t think of an excuse.

“It’s just…” he says as he waits.

“I’m not looking for any distraction from baseball. I need to keep focused because I do plan on getting that scholarship and playing for the University of Texas.”

That’s at least part of the truth and it seems to be enough as he nods and grabs his keys.

***

We arrive at the Club and the bouncer looks over our IDs quickly and lets us by.

“Wow, that was too easy,” I comment as we walk through the club full of dancing sweaty bodies, people swaying as the walk, and music loud enough to make your balls vibrate with the bass.

“Dude! This place is awesome!” Levi says excitedly as he shakes me.

“Let’s get some drinks!” I yell over the music and he nods and walks towards the bar.

We walk past a gay couple making out by the bar. My jealousy hits me badly. I want to be able to be out and open like that with my sexuality but I’m terrified for many reasons.

One, I don’t know how my parents would react. They’re not super religious but they are also not very open-minded. And two what will Levi think? Will he push me away?

Levi orders the drinks and slides a whiskey my way.

“Drink up pretty boy, we came here to forget about everything.” He says as he slams the drink in one gulp. I watch as he swallows it and I swallow myself. This complement thing is starting to become more of a habit for him. Unless it wasn’t a compliment.

“Pretty boy?”

He put his cup down and for a split second, I swear he looked down at my lips.

“It’s just a nickname, not that I’m, calling you pretty or anything… well I’m not saying you aren’t either all I’m saying is… I need another drink.” He says almost nervously, as he calls out for the bartender and she smiles and makes us two more drinks.

“Dude… what the hell am I doing wrong?” He asks after we’ve had 3 drinks, and we sit at a booth.

“What are you talking about Levi?”

“I mean, why can’t I be happy in a relationship? I mean a lot of people are, and they make it look easy, but for me? I always get fucked over in the end.”

He sighs and I grab his hand. He looks at our joined hands with a bit of confusion but doesn’t pull away, then his eyes meet mine.

“You deserve better, that’s for damn sure. But don’t, for one second believe you are at fault for your relationships, taking downfalls. You just haven’t met the person in your life that will make you forget about all of that.”

Shit. That was a lot more heartfelt than I intended it to be, but fuck it. He needs to hear the truth. He’s a great guy.

He blinks as I pull my hand away and I take a large gulp of my 4th drink.

“Venny… That was… Thank you. I need to hear that.”

“Oh, I know,” I tell him with a small smile and his eyes drop to my lips again, and this time I can’t be imagining it. His eyes fly back to mine and he looks a bit uncomfortable as he leans back, trying to act casual.

“So… any girl catch your attention yet?” He asks me taking a sip. Damn him.

“Um… Well.” I’m such a fucking bad liar, if I lie he will know.

“Not really,” I tell him and he looks around the bar and smiles.

“Want me to play wingman for you?” He asks with a smirk. No. FUCK. NO.

“Sure,” I say with a shrug. I’m such an idiot.

He points to a young woman sitting at the bar by herself. She pretty, at least from behind, I couldn’t see her face, but she’s obviously not my type.

“You know what? Never mind, let’s just…”

“Hey!” He calls out to her and I smack his arm as he laughs. His drunkenness is starting to show and I try to halt him before he makes a mess.

The woman turns around and looks at us.

“Hey, you look a bit lonely, and we’re looking to meet new people. Wanna join us?” He asks her casually and she smiles and nods, as she walks over.

“I’m Levi, and this is my best friend Venny.” She smiles between the two of us before sitting down next to Levi.

“I’m Jolly.” She says in a Californian accent as she shakes both of our hands.

“Oh, like the emotion?” He asks her and she nods with a blush.

“Yeah, I know it’s strange.”

“I like it.” He says flirting with her and I feel a bit deflated.

“It’s nice to meet you Jolly,” I tell her not wanting to make things awkward and she nods with a kind smile.

“You too. I haven’t seen you guys at this club before. Is this your first time?” She asks us, well mostly Levi as he nods with a twinkle in his eyes.

Ew. Don’t fucking look at her like that, you jerk. I mean… nevermind.

Suddenly she gets a phone call and when she reads the Caller I’d she quickly excuses herself.

“Sorry, this is a work call. Maybe I’ll see you two again, sometime. Bye!” She says as she pulls out a business card, slides it towards Levi, and walks out of the bar.

I’m staring at the card with laser vision, and Levi snaps his fingers in my face.

“Hey, Venny. If you want her number, you can have it. You don’t need to get jealous.”

Oh, he thought…

“No, it’s okay dude. She wasn’t my type.” I admit and he shrugs.

“She isn’t mine either.” He says as he rips the card into peace’s and I look at him in shock.

“But she was pretty and kind.”

“But I saw her Caller ID. It said hubby, on it. I’ve had enough of the cheating BS. Let’s get out of here before mom comes home.” He says as he stands and right as we were about to leave his eyes go wide and he quickly pulls me to a dark corner of the club.

“What? What is it?” I ask him as he looks behind me.

“Mom’s here. What the fuck?”

I laugh, and he looks at me in a crazed way.

“Well, she did say she was going out with friends tonight, so…”

“So she can’t see us here, and apparently she’s only here with one friend, look.”

I turn around and see his mom locked lipped with another middle-aged woman.

“Holy shit,” I say under my breath.

“Yeah, exactly. Let’s go!” He says taking my hand and pulling me out of the club. I hate how normal his hand feels in mine. At least I should, but I don’t.

As he gets to his car I stop him.

“Wait Levi, you can’t drive,” I tell him and he shrugs as he gets in the car, forcing me to do the same.

“Watch me Venny.”

“Go! Get out of the fucking driver’s seat. I’ll drive.” I tell him as I reach over and open his door. Wow, he surprisingly smells amazing despite having a hint of whiskey.

“You’re no more sober than I am!”

I groan frustrated.

“But I have a higher tolerance than you do, so come on, switch places with me.”

He sighs as he steps out and we switch sides.

(4) headache

Venny POV:

The morning after, at my parent’s house, I get such a terrible headache that I wonder how I deal with it. I take some pills for the pain, but it barely helps. It also doesn’t help that I’m prone to migraines.

“Morning Venny, are you okay?” My mom Bella asks as she puts a mug of coffee in front of me.

“Yeah mom, I’m fine. Just another migraine.” I tell her and she pouts.

“You should see a doctor about that. It’s been getting worse hasn’t it?” She asks as she holds my head and kisses my forehead. She’s a total sweetheart.

“Kind of? I used to only get it once a month, but now it’s becoming a weekly thing.” I admit she huffs.

“See? This what I’m saying. Make yourself an appointment, and I’ll take you okay?”

I sigh and nod, as I rub my temples.

“Don’t you have a baseball game today?” She asks me and my eyes get wide.

“Shit, yeah, I totally forgot!”

“Language.” She says in a warning tone.

“Sorry, but yeah it’s three pm today. And next week is the final game of the season. Are you coming?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world sweetheart.” She says as she wipes down the kitchen counter.

“Thanks.”

***

Levi POV:

Last night was a lot of things. It started off depressing then it got real interesting, real fast.

Venny was acting differently, and I was feeling different. I’m not sure if it was the alcohol, but I was starting to see Venny in a new light. A weird, sexy new light.

I noticed how plump his lips were, like the perfect lips, and why the fuck am I thinking about his lips? That’s beyond me. The liquid courage combined with the way Venny was looking at me last night as if we were the only ones at the club, made me curious, and also a bit scared.

“How may I help you?” I ask the woman as she looks over the menu and ignores me. After a while, she says she wants a burger with sweet potato fries.

“Coming right up,” I say as I write down the order and clip it on to the order rope. I hate working on the weekends, but I have to help mom pay the bills since dad split. I have a pretty bad hangover today, but I’m assuming it’s not worse than Venny’s. Poor guy gets the worst headaches. I probably should have thought of that before getting him shit faced last night.

“Hey Levi, you can take your break now.” My manager tells me and I smile gratefully.

“Thanks, Martha.”

She nods as she takes my place and I walk out of the restaurant towards my car and pull out my phone. I might as well do a good deed today.

I call Venny and he picks up after the third ring.

Venny: (“Levi, hey, what’s up?“)

Levi: (“How are you holding up today?“) He sighs deeply.

Venny: (“I’m barely holding up. My head is killing me and I have a game later. I’m at the batting cage now just practicing on my own.“)

Levi: (“Shit man, I’m sorry. How about I bring you some lunch? I’m not too far from the batting cage.“)

Venny: (“I won’t say no to free food.“)

Levi: (“You wouldn’t dare. I’m on my way.“)

***

I spot Venny laying down under the shade of a tree with his workout clothes on and a bat by his head.

“Venny,” I say his name, and he groans. I sit next to him and place his food beside him.

“Head still hurting?”

“Yes, I’m afraid I might not be able to play tonight if it doesn’t get better.” He says a bit upset, as he props himself on an elbow and picks up his sandwich. He looks into my eyes with pain written on his face.

“Thank you.” He says before devouring the sandwich.

As he’s chewing I know what will make him feel better, and before I can think better of it, I place my hand over his head and begin to massage his scalp. His curls are so soft and thick. He gasps before relaxing, letting out a deep breath.

“Oh my goodness Levi…” he says before a moan escapes his lips. I get goosebumps at the sound of it. The hell is wrong with me? I quickly pull my hand away and he pouts.

“Why’d you stop?” He asks and I clear my throat.

“Well, I just don’t want to disturb you while you’re eating.” I lie and he shakes his head.

“Please Levi?” How can I say no to those pleading eyes on his baby face? I’m so fucked.

I place my hand on his head and massage his scalp. His eyes roll back and he moans again. When my cock twitches beneath my jeans I pull back even faster this time and get to my feet. He looks at me confused.

“Sorry, I just forgot, I need to be at work now. My break is over.” I say as I brush the dirt off my jeans.

“Oh yeah. No problem, thanks for the sandwich. Will I see you later in the game?”

I smile and nod.

“Yeah, I’m always there aren’t I?”

He nods with a half-smile.

“You wouldn’t be my best friend if you weren’t.”

As I get to my truck my hands shake. What the fuck, cock? Right now is not the time to get confused!

As I’m driving back to work I notice a familiar car parked outside. Its Arias. Just perfect. I walk in and there she is sitting at a table alone she stands up and walks towards me.

“Aria, don’t. I don’t need to hear whatever it is you’re going to say.” I tell her but she ignores me.

“I’m sorry. I just wanted to tell you that, because I would go crazy if I didn’t. But I’m not going to ask you to take me back, I know I have no more chances left. But I do apologize.”

I nod.

“Alright, now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get back to work.”

She sighs and shrugs.

“Fine. At least I said it.” She says as she walks out.

Why do people expect you to forgive them, just because they tell you to forgive them? I’m still torn about what happened.

(5) Baller

Venny POV:

“Alright guys, we need to win this to continue our winning streak.” The coach tells us, then he looks towards me and says. “And Venny, I need your a game today, nothing like last time.”

Way to embarrass me infrot of the whole team.

“I’ve been practicing my batting today, I’m sure I could knock it out of the park.”

He laughs deeply, as he walks back towards me.

“Listen Venny… You didn’t bat so well during the last game. Perhaps your head wasn’t in it all the way, Just do better.”

I sigh and nod. Lionel walks up to me and pats my shoulder.

“Don’t let this get to you Venny. You’re a great player, and he will soon realize that, or he will end up regretting it. You just have to prove yourself again, and word of advice… our coach is a moron, but you need to get on his good side if you want him to recommend you to the University of Texas. I know you want to be a part of the Longhorns.”

“But why are you helping me out? Don’t you want this as bad as I do?”

He shakes his head with a smirk.

“Not quite. I love baseball, but I’m not in love with it like you are. I wanna be a businessman instead, just like my dad, and maybe open a hotel in Puerto Rico, by a nice Cave system or something.”

I look at him surprised.

“Wow, well I hope that works out for you Lionel.”

He smiles as he sits down on the bench next to me.

“Yeah, me too. I’m tired of people thinking I’m just a pretty face. I wanna prove myself. Just as you should, in that field.”

How kind of him.

“Hey Lionel, watch out for that one. You might catch his gay!” Sam yells at us from afar and Lionel flicks him off.

“I’m pretty sure the only reason you always call him gay is that you are in the closet yourself. Fuck outta here. Oh and by the way, your party was fucking trash last year, I don’t expect it to be any better this year.” Lionel shoots back at him and I chuckle as sam flicks him off and walks away.

“Why do you let him talk to you like that?” He asks me almost annoyed.

“I just figured the more I ignore him the less he would care.”

He looks at me curiously.

“Is he right? You know about you being g…”

“No, no, I think he just says that because he can’t come up with anything better to say.”

“Oh, because if you are I wouldn’t judge you for it, just so you know.”

“You really mean that?”

He nods as he stands up from the bench.

***

Levi POV:

I arrive at the game and sit in the front bleachers. The field is filling up fast so I’m glad I got here soon. My mom sits next to me with a bag of popcorn. She never misses a game I go to and is always cheering Venny on with me.

I spot him walking towards the outfield as the game begins.

The first batter from the opposing team from Jalisco High’s school, which people call the grapes since their team’s colors are purple and green, is practicing his swings.

Our school’s colors are red and white, so they call us the tampons, were actually the red pandas, but whatever, they’re just jealous we’ve won almost every game this season.

“Red pandas! Red pandas! Red pandas!” Our school cheers and the other school boos.

The catcher signals a fastball, the pitcher throws the first ball, and the batter strikes. He misses the second ball and by the first ball he hits it but Venny quickly catches it and brings it to second base.

“Wooo! Go Venny!” I yell out to him and he and waves in my direction.

“Stop it, you’re embarrassing the poor kid.” My mom says giggling.

“Looks who’s talking mom. You were the one who stole the mascot head and ran around the football field back when I played football and chanted my name.” I can’t make this shit up.

“Well, I guess you got that from me then.” She says bopping my nose.

1 more player strikes out, then the third player actually gets a home fucking run.

Venny charges after the ball and throws it to Lionel from so far away that it seems almost impossible, but Lionel catches it and brings it to third base right before the player could get to it.

“Holy shit! That was epic! Mom, please tell me you were recording that.” I tell her and she nods.

“Duh, I record all the games. Venny is like my second son, I like to brag about him too.” She says as she zooms in on her phone.

The red pandas pretty much have the rest of the game in the bag. Lionel gets a home run. Jacob gets a home run. But there is one more player left to bat.

Please choose Venny.

Then I see the coach pointing towards him and Venny and he gets up excited. He whispers something to Venny and he nods.

Whether Venny strikes out or not, the team is already going to win.

“Red pandas! Red Pandas!”

Venny looks in my direction and from this far, I can’t tell if he’s looking at me or not, but then he smiles and points towards me. I smile back and nod.

He just silently told me that if he gets this, it’s for me… FOR. ME. Usually, players do that for their girlfriends, but that’s not weird is it? I mean… shit. I don’t know how I feel about that. But one thing is for sure…

My heart just fucking fluttered.

He shows off a bit by flipping the bat in the air and catching it at the perfect position.

The pitcher throws the first ball, and he misses.

“Come on Venny,” I say to myself and mom cheers him on.

Then he hits the second ball so fucking hard that it flew over the fence and a fan caught it.

“Oh my God!” I yell along with the rest of the school as we all stand and cheer as he jogs to all of the bases and once he reaches home base the team picks him up in celebration, and I quickly run towards him and pull him into a hug.

“Venny, that was fucking awesome!” I tell him as I shake him and he grins from ear to ear.

“Thanks Levi.”

“Yo Coach! You better get this guy a scholarship!” Lionel shouts to the coach who seems to be thinking about it.

“The team and I are going to celebrate at a pizzeria, wanna come with?” He asks me and I nod smiling.

“Damn right I do.”

(6) The truth

Venny POV:

The whole team, Levi and I sit at a big table at the pizzeria, and one of the players, Kyle makes a toast.

“For killing it tonight on the field, and for killing it in every other damn game in the season. Cheers!” We clank our sodas together and begin to eat.

“Thanks for coming Levi.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal, but his support means a lot to me.

“You would do the same for me, besides it’s nice to hang out with the guys.” He says right as Lionel discreetly passes him a flask.

“Sly mother fucker.” He says in a teasing way with a smirk at Lionel before bringing his soda out of view and filling it with a bit of alcohol.

“You didn’t get that from me. Pass it on.” He says nodding my way and Levi passes me the flask. I pour some into my cup then hand it back.

“Thanks, man,” I tell him and he nods, before talking to the rest of the guys. Levi looks between Lionel and me curiously.

“Are you leaving me for a new best friend? If so we’re going to have a problem.” He says jokingly and I chuckle and shake my head.

“You almost sound jealous Levi,” I tell him and he seems to think about it for a long time.

“What if I am?” He asks while holding my gaze and suddenly I get the feeling he’s no longer joking. Then he laughs and smacks my shoulder.

“I’m kidding Venny.”

I laugh a bit nervously as I remember the way he cheered my name at the game. The pride in his eyes, the good vibes he gave off. Then I dedicated a freaking home run to him.

After dinner, the team goes home and I head towards my Toyota, and Levi towards his truck. I stop in my track and walk towards him.

“Hey Levi, wanna come over later and play video games with me?”

“Yes you nerd, I do.” He says with a wink before getting into his car. Hmm.

“Hey!” I call out to him and he lowers his window. “Did you just wink at me?”

He laughs. The sound blessing my ears.

“Nah, there was something in my eye. Damn pollen. Later Venny.” It’s not even pollen season.

***

I think it’s time I told him the truth, I think to myself as I pace back in forth in my room. But I’m afraid of losing my best friend. I mean maybe he will be okay with it, but what if things won’t be the same afterward?

Shit. I plop into my bed before I hear a soft knock.

“Yes, mom?”

“I’m not your mom, however if I was I would tell you not to leave your socks all over the hall,” Levi says with a chuckle.

“Oh, ha, come in.”

“Think fast.”

He opens the door and throws some small bags of chips my way. Like he’s playing dodge ball and I catch them all. He falls onto my bed and begins juggling the bags.

“Um… I need to talk to you Levi. It’s important.” I tell him not wanting to wait any longer. He stops juggling and sits up.

“Are you okay?” He asks and I nod.

“Then what do you want to tell me?”

I take a deep breath but as I’m about to say it I freeze.

“Venny? You can tell me anything you know?”

“I’m… I uh… I’ve never told anyone this before and I’m a bit nervous.”

He tilts his head at me.

“Just rip it off like a bandaid, whatever it is.”

“I’m gay,” I say as I nervously await his reaction. His mouth drops as I expected but then he shakes away his surprise and nods.

“Okay. So you’re gay…” he says almost too casually.

“How long have you known?” He asks and I gulp.

“When I had sex for the first time with Norah. I realized I like women, just not in that way.”

He bites his lip thoughtfully.

“I honestly don’t know what to say.”

“Just tell me, this doesn’t change anything. Please.”

He sighs.

“Of course it doesn’t change anything Venny. I’m just still in a bit of shock that’s all.”

“Well, I’m still coming to terms with it myself, and I guess I still have one foot in the closet,” I admit and he chuckles.

“Just like my mom. So I’m going to tell you the same thing I tell mom… Get that damn foot out of there so you can finally be yourself, and not give a damn what people think of you.”

I smile at him and shake my head.

“It’s not that easy Levi. I’m Italian, and my family is everything to me. Coming out to them is going to be hard.”

He lays a hand on my shoulder.

“You will only lose the people who didn’t love you, and those people don’t deserve to be in your life anyway.”

I look into his eyes seeing his beautiful soul and I smile.

“True. Thanks for, um… not pushing me away.”

His eyebrows scrunch as if he can’t believe what I’m saying then he pulls me into his arms for a strong hug.

“You underestimate the power of our friendship silly.” He whispers before pulling away and I can’t stop the blush from forming on my face.

“Well… uh… that’s all I wanted to talk about. We can play video games now.” I say trying to get back to our normal mood.

“Alright, but be ready to get your ass handed to you because I’ve been practicing this game all weekend. So much. My thumbs have built some muscle.”

He says as he grabs a controller and starts the game.

How the hell did I get to be so lucky and find a friend like him?

We play games and joke around as usual as if I never mentioned I was gay.

***

*who else could use a friend like Levi?*

(7) Date with an angel

One month later:

Levi POV:

I’ve met a cute chick during detention two weeks ago, after punching Sam in the face for calling Venny the f word after he hugged me in the hallway.

Venny hasn’t even come out yet, and he has already been getting shit from that asshole. I don’t even know if he knows he’s gay or if he is just assuming. And if he knows, how the fuck does he know?

That doesn’t matter, all I know is that I wish I could have gotten another punch in. My mom told my dad about the fight and he was disappointed in me. Not that I give a damn. He doesn’t even visit me anymore since the divorce.

Anyways… back to the cute girl I met…

Her name is Alice, and she’s been texting me flirty things for 2 weeks and she has a sweet personality, good morals, and she’s a painter, a very talented one at that.

“Hey Alice, I was thinking we should go on a real date sometime,” I tell her as we sit together in class. She flicks her blond curls out of her face and smiles warmly.

“I would love that. I’m free after school.”

“Awesome.”

Alice is great, why? Because ever since I started talking to her, I’ve had less time to think about a certain someone’s plump lips, and voice and hair, and…

“What time would you pick me up?” She asks interrupting my forbidden thoughts of my best friend.

“Oh, um does seven work for you?”

She nods and the teacher tells us to be quiet.

After class, I walk Alice to her car and hug her goodbye, right as Venny walks to his car parked next to hers. She drives away as Venny unlocks his old Toyota.

He sees me and smirks.

“She’s cute.” He says as I walk towards him.

“Has Sam been giving you any more shit?” I ask him and he sighs deeply and avoids my eyes.

“You know Levi, maybe it’s best I fight him next time, I’m starting to look like a scared little shit, and I need to teach him a lesson myself. I was about to before you intervened.”

Indeed, Venny was actually about to fight Sam but I pulled him back and took over. I didn’t want to see him hurt, but now I realize how bad that is for his image.

“I’m sorry. Are you still mad at me?”

He finally looks me in the eyes and says no.

“But I am mad that you’re not telling me about this Alice girl. How serious are yall?”

“We’re not that serious, but I like her. I invited her on a date tonight. So you know, baby steps.”

He nods looking a bit deflated, before plastering a smile.

“I’m happy for you. You deserve to be with someone better after Aria.”

“Yeah, I agree, but um… it’s good to know she has your approval. Your opinion matters to me you know.”

He sadly looks down at my lips for a brief moment before nodding.

“Yeah, I know.” He says as he opens the car but before he gets in I pull him back and face him towards me.

“What is it?” I ask him and he looks at me confused.

“What do you mean, Levi?”

“What’s got you in this mood?”

“What mood? I’m just tired, alright? and I wanna go home and binge-watch Supernatural.” He says as he pulls away and gets in his car.

“Good luck on your date.” He says before shutting the door.

The hell is he acting this way for?

***

6:45

I arrive at Alice’s huge house a bit earlier than would be considered “cool,” but I also didn’t want to make a bad impression.

I text her that I’m outside and she comes out 5 minutes later looking beautiful in a little black dress, and short heels. Her hair is straightened and she wears minimal makeup. But that smile is her best weapon.

Aria who?

“Hey, Levi.” She says in a chippy mood as I open the passenger door for her.

“Hey Alice, you look beautiful, I’m feeling a tad bit underdressed.” She looks me up and down at my casual bad boy type of outfit and smirks approvingly.

“I’d say you clean up nice as well.” She says with a wink as she gets in the car.

We arrive at a semi-fancy restaurant and sit at a small table.

“Damn, if the tables are this small, I’m almost afraid to see how small the plates are going to be,” I admit, and she giggles.

“Too fancy for you?” She asks and I shrug.

“I suppose I don’t do Fancy often, but I’m willing to try new things,” I tell her honestly and she smiles.

“That’s really kind of you Levi. You have a really soft side despite dressing like a heartbreaker.”

I chuckle as I look down at my clothes.

“What? Would you rather me be dressed in a suit?”

She shakes her and smirks at me.

“I’d rather you not be dressed at all.”

My eyes bug out as I take a moment to register what this sweet girl just said to me.

She laughs and blushes embarrassed.

“Sorry. That was just a slip of the tongue.”

I shake my head chuckling.

“Careful with that tongue of yours then.” I wink at her.

“I’m… um, I’m actually waiting for marriage to do any of that stuff. People think that my parents are forcing me to do it, but it’s actually my decision.”

I laugh deeply. It’s too bad she’s off the table.

“God help whoever marries you and realize that you are not as innocent as you look. They may wake up strapped to your bed and think they just got kidnapped, meanwhile Alice the angel is standing over him in a not so angelic outfit, and…”

She cracks up and holds a hand over my mouth.

“Hush Levi! Someone will hear you!” She says in her pretty English accent and I can’t help but grin.

Alice is perfect, but why do I feel she isn’t the one?

Damn it.

Venny.

(8) broken glass

*Trigger warning*

Venny POV: I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately and I figured today would be the day I come out to my family. I have to stop being afraid, and just rip the bandaid off once and for all. I planned a bowling trip with my mom and dad, and my older sister who lives on the outskirts of town.

But just at the thought of it, my stomach drops. I remember as a kid dad used to say gay jokes, and back then I used to think it was funny. Oh, how the tables have turned.

Is my dad homophobic? Growing up, I used to believe he was, but that maybe over time he learned not to be.

“Morning mom. Is dad coming back from his business trip today?” I ask her as I pass to kiss her head.

“Yes, baby. He’s been stressed lately so I don’t think he would want to go bowling with us. We should reschedule.” She suggested with guilt in her kind eyes.

“No problem. I just want to talk to him anyway. Well, talk to all of you.”

“About?”

“That will just ruin the purpose of getting you all together.”

She smiles, and pat’s my cheek.

“Well, then you will have to wait till next week.”

I sigh and nod.

“Okay, well… do you know what time dad will be home today?”

“Why don’t you call him? I’m sure he misses you.” She tells me as she passes by me with a smile.

Dad has always been a little bit intimidating to me. Maybe it’s the carries himself like he’s the boss of everything, or the way slightly judges people. Fuck… I’m starting to second think myself.

No. I have to be brave.

I step outside and pull my phone out to call him.

Pilo: (“Hello, son.“) He says in a way that tells me he’s had a hard day.

Venny: (“Hey dad, are you feeling okay?“)

Pilo: (“Oh yeah. It’s just hard being the boss and all. Had to fire a lady who disrespected me today, but never before. How are you? I heard about the game! That’s my fucking boy!“) I smile at the praise.

Venny: (“Yeah, thanks! That game was great… Um do you have any free time to talk to me today, in person?“)

Long pause.

Pilo: (“Sure. I’m fishing with my buddy Felix on his property today. I’ll send you the address and you can come by.“)

I take a deep breath.

Venny: (“Sounds good. Send me the address.”)

Pilo: (“Yep.”)

***

I drive up to the address dad sent me and I’m surprised this big property wasn’t too far from home. I spot dad sitting by the lake with a beer in his hand next to two other guys who are also drinking and laughing hysterically. I catch the end of my dad’s joke as I walk up behind them, and my stomach twists.

“So after I mistook him for a woman that f*g told me to call him, and I died laughing!”

I clear my throat and all three of them look my way. Dad smile as he get to his feet and pulls me in for a hug.

“Hey son, I would like you to meet Bruce, and Felix, my good friends.”

I smile politely and wave, they hold their beers up as a sort of wave back.

“Come join us kid, we’re just telling funny stories…”

“Actually if you guys don’t mind, I just want a quick word with my dad, I haven’t seen him all week, and I just want to catch up right quick.”

They nod.

“Sure, take that fart tard away for a moment so we call all breath some fresh air,” Felix says waving a hand in front of his face as the others crack up.

“Shove this,” Dad says flicking him off with a laugh of his own before standing up and motioning me to follow him.

We get inside the quiet wooden house, and he sits on the couch, and I do the same.

“So, what is it you want to talk to me about? Girl troubles? If so, I’m probably not the best parent for that, but I can try.”

He says casually and I shake my head. Just fucking tell him. Just do it. FUCK!

“I’m gay.”

Silence, dead silence before he starts laughing hysterically.

“That’s funny Venny. But tell me the truth.”

I give him a serious expression and his smile drops so fast as he stands up abruptly.

“Venny… tell me you are joking.” He says between clenched teeth, and for a second I almost want to lie and tell him, it was just a joke, but how pathetic would that be?

“No. Dad, I’m ga…” he slaps me hard against my face and gasp as my cheek stings and before I have time to react he pulls me up by my collar roughly and his eyes are deadly looking into mine.

“You wanna try that again son? I don’t think I heard you properly.” He spits out with his beer breath over my face.

Oh my God… this is worse than I could have ever imagined, but I don’t cower. Not anymore.

“I’m gay!” I yell back in his face, loud and clear and he punches me in the gut so hard, I nearly vomit as I fall to the ground. Tears fall down my face as I try to stand but he pushes me back down.

“I didn’t fucking raise you to be gay, boy! You are supposed to have a family and carry on the family business to them. How the fuck are you going to do that now?!”

“Dad. Please I…”

“Shut the hell up! I would rather have a dead son than a gay one.” He says the last part in a low voice, but it sounds as if he said it through fucking stadium speakers and it goes straight through my soft heart.

“You, can’t mean that dad! What the hell are you…”

“Get out!” He yells at me as he picks me up and nearly throws me out of his friend’s house. I blindly run to my car as I wipe away tears.

This can’t be fucking happening. This is just a nightmare, right? I’m going to wake up anytime soon?

I start the car with shaky fingers and notice his friends walk into the house concerned while looking back at me curiously.

I put the car into reverse then peel out. I stop by a liquor shop on my way and order 6 bottles of Jack. I’m going to need something, anything to take my head off of what just happened. The guy at the bar sees my expression and doesn’t bother asking me for an ID. He looks like he feels bad for me.

“Have a nice day.” He says as I pay for the bottles and walk out. Nice day? Oh, this day is far from that. Luckily when I get home mom isn’t there. Maybe she’s at my sister’s house. Perfect.

I walk up to my room and slam the door. I turn on some rock music loudly and begin to drink. Wasting no time. I drunk half of the first bottle and began to feel antsy so I drunk the second half of it and nod.

“That’s more fucking like it.”

I take another bottle out of the bag and drink the whole thing as if my fucking life depends on it, in a matter of minutes.

My dad’s words creep up into my thoughts like bullets and I angrily throw the empty bottle across the room smashing it into little pieces.

Who would say something so heartless?

(9) By my side

Later that day:

Levi POV:

“Venny open the door. Why do I smell vomit? Venny!” I yell as I bang on his door until he opens it. Once he opens it he nearly falls to the ground before I catch him. He is clearly drunk and there are bottles and glass everywhere.

“Holy shit, man how much have you drank?”

“Like 4 bottles of Jack.” He mumbles as he clenches on to me.

“You idiot, you’re going to get alcohol poisoning! Here, drink some water.”

“No! Fuck that!” He yells suddenly upset, trying to push me away.

“Venny, what the hell happened last night? Your mother is worried about you and called me when you wouldn’t open your door.”

“I told dad I was gay.” He says with a broken voice and my heart cracks down the middle.

“Come here. Sit down and tell me all about it.”

He starts laughing hysterically out of nowhere. Oh no, that’s a really bad sign. I brace myself for whatever it is he’s going to say.

“Where do I start? Should I start at the part when I told my dad and he slapped me before punched me hard in the gut? Or the part where he told me he would rather have a dead son, than a gay one? I’m officially disowned by him, Levi.”

That just sucked out all of my fucking air as I stare at him in disbelief. Tears start falling down my eyes as I realize what he was trying to do.

“Venny… Jesus…” I say as I pull him towards my chest and hugged him so tightly I’m surprised he didn’t tap out.

“Please, for fucks sake, tell me you didn’t try to drink yourself to death because of what that shit bag said to you. Venny. Please fucking tell me.” I say with a cracked voice as tears cloud my vision.

“I… I thought about it, sure. But then I started throwing up and I figured why keep drinking if, it’s going to come back out?”

“You fucking Idiot! Don’t you realize how loved you are? You can’t just do shit like that. Didn’t you think about your mother, the rest of your family, your friends, me? Did you not imagine how I would feel? Fuck.”

He sniffs and pulls away to look at me. His eyes are bloodshot as I’m sure mine is too.

“I’m so sorry Levi.”

I gulp as I wipe his tears away.

“Where is that shit bag of your father right now?” I ask him not giving a damn about calling him what he is and he sighs.

“He’s probably at his friend’s property still. He told me he wants me out of the house in a week, and to tell mom what happened. I still haven’t had the guts to tell her and…”

“I’ll tell her okay? You’ve already dealt with enough Venny, and you can come live with me. Mom and I have a spare bedroom since dad moved out, but something tells me that you’re mom is going to go full momma bear and demand that you stay here, and she’ll kick his ass out.”

He chuckles dryly.

“That sounds like mom alright.”

“Stay here and rest. I’ll go talk to her, and explain everything.” He nods before falling back into the bed, his head hitting the pillow and his eyes shutting.

I reach into my backpack and place a water bottle next to him.

“I want this bottle of water empty by the time I get back, so start drinking,” I tell him as I walk out and search for his mother, and find her on the couch staring at nothing. She spots me and looks worried.

“Levi, there you are, tell me what’s going on.”

I sit next to her and sigh.

“You are not going to like what I have to tell you,” I warn her.

***

Venny POV:

I stare at the water bottle that is by my head like it’s the angel on my shoulder trying to make me do the right thing. It’s almost as if it’s chanting “Drink me. Drink me.”

I take the bottle and take a few sips. Umm, refreshing. Then in no time I drink the whole thing, crush it, and toss it into the trash.

I hear a knock on my door followed by my mother’s loud sobbing.

“Venny, baby, please open up.” I get up off the bed and stumble towards the door, try not to fall, and once I open the door mom practically tackles me, and she hugs me tightly and cries loudly.

“I… I… I’m sorry about what happened.” She stutters as she tries to stop her crying and I rub her back.

“I love you, and accept you for who you are, and you are not going anywhere, okay? You may be grown, but you will always be my baby, and I will not abandon you.” She says crying onto my shirt.

I spot Levi leaning against the door frame watching us with a sad look on his face. A sad look that I know will turn into an angry one for my father very soon. That’s a bomb I’m going to have to defuse if I don’t want any more problems.

“I love you too mom.” She pulls away wiping her tears.

“Just so you know, If it isn’t already obvious, I’m divorcing your father. It’s something I’ve been wanting to do for a long time anyway and this was the final nail in the coffin.” She says sounding angry now.

“Good,” I tell her and she nods before giving me a serious look.

“Don’t ever scare me like that ever again, you hear me?” I nod and kiss her head.

“I hear you ma.”

“Good. How badly did he hurt you? Do you need to go to the hospital?” She asks and I shake my head.

“I’ll be okay, I promise.”

“Okay, well then get some rest then join me later in the living room to binge watch supernatural and eat junk food.” She says with a small smile and sniff.

“I will.”

“Meanwhile. I’ll keep him company.” Levi suggests as he walks in and hands me another bottle of water, before laying on my bed.

Mom gives him a look that silently says ‘thank you’, before heading out of my room, and closing the door behind her.

“Bottle number two. Drink up.” He says as he waves it in front of me and I take it.

“You don’t have to be here you know? I know you probably want to be out with Alice. It’s fine.”

He shakes his head.

“Alice is cool and all, but there is no other place I’d rather be than in a vomit stenched room with my drunk best friend as I remind him how great he is.” He says so genuinely that my heart swells.

“You mean that?”

“Every word. Now drink.”

I drink the water and toss it in the trash, before laying down next to him with only inches between us.

“I don’t deserve you,” I whisper and I am surprised to feel his warm hand reach down to hold mine.

“Levi what are you d…”

“Shhh.” He says as his fingers rub mine soothingly.

“Just shhh. Shut your eyes and rest.” He says as he intertwines his fingers with mine and shuts his eyes as if this was the most natural thing in the world. And I’ll admit I love the way his hand feels in mine and the way my heart reacts to it.

Soon I begin to relax and shut my eyes too. I drift off into deep sleep that my body has been begging me for and feel a lot better, and it has everything to do with the man by my side.

(10) Fingers

Levi POV:

When I wake up a few hours later Venny is still sound asleep next to me. I look down at our interlaced fingers and the reality hits me like a hard smack in the face.

I love him. But only as a friend right? Fuck. I love him… NO…

I can’t believe I just admitted that. To myself that is. I wonder how long I’ve felt this way. Since I’ve known him for so long it’s hard to tell. He can’t know that though, it would ruin us.

His fingers clench around mine slightly in his sleep with a moan and my heart soars. Mother of…!

*knock, knock, knock*

I pull my hand free from his gently as I stand to get the door. His mother stands there looking curious.

“How’s my baby?”

Gosh, she’s so sweet.

“He’s still sleeping, but he’s hydrated now.”

“Good, thank you, Levi. I’m glad he has you. Also, I’m about to make dinner soon. After we finish eating I’ll save your mom a plate in tinfoil.” She whispers trying not to wake him up.

“No problem, and thank you.” She smiles warmly and nods before walking out. I quietly shut the door but Venny seems to hear it as he moans in his sleep, and turns in his bed facing the wall. A few seconds later he turns back around feeling around the bed for me. He pats the bed and when he doesn’t find me his eyes drift open. His tired eyes lock on mine and he smiles.

“Hey there sleepy.” I whisper and he whispers back, “Come here,” in a groggy voice that has my cock at attention.

I walk slowly back towards the bed and lay back down next to him. My chest heaves in anticipation.

He looks down at my hand and looks back at me with his curious blue eyes, as if asking for permission. I snort before grabbing his hand and interlacing my fingers through his.

He bites his lip as he looks down at our hands, and smiles slightly.

“Don’t make this weird Alright?” I warn him and he chuckles.

“Nothing weird about two best friends holding hands right?” He asks and smirks at me.

“I said don’t make it weird, and you’re making it weird,” I tell him as I try to hide my smile.

“Levi… are your hands always so warm?” He asks me and I nod.

“Yeah, my body runs warmer than most. It’s terrible during the summer, but amazing during winter.”

“I can imagine.” He whispers as his fingers start playing with mine. My heart picks up speed as my eyes met his. Is he imagining me warming him up?

“How’s your head feeling?” I ask as I shift slightly to touch his forehead with my free hand and slowly slide my fingers towards his hair where I begin to rub.

He shuts his eyes and moans deeply.

“Humm, you’re good at that.” He admits with a blissful sigh.

“I hope you plan on tipping me for my services.” I tease and he chuckles.

“You are going above and beyond friendly duties, that’s for sure.”

“Yeah, don’t get used to it.”

“Now that I’ve had a taste, it’s hard not to.” He says as he opens his eyes and looks down at my lips, that I’m nibbling on.

“Levi…”

“Food’s ready!” His mom calls out interrupting him. What the heck was he going to say?

“Oh thank God. I’m starving.” He says with his eyes still glued to my lips. Then he snaps out of it and pulls away from me to stand up. I’m starving too. Starving to know what his lips feel like.

“Come on.” He says as he pulls me up by the hand.

***

After dinner Bella wraps up some food for mom and I hug her goodbye as Venny walks me out to my truck.

“Hey, Levi, I know I already said this, but thank you.”

I pull him into my arms and hug him with a little smile.

“No problem, just text me if anything,” I say as I pull away from him and he nods.

At home, I’m sitting on the couch with mom and I tell her what happened to him. After re-telling the story I get pissed off again at that asshole.

“Poor Venny.”

“There’s um… something else,” I tell her and she cocks an eyebrow.

“I um… I guess out of the heat of the moment, I held his hand and we slept hand in hand on his bed, and it felt… Natural.”

I gulp and look down at my hands.

“What does that mean?” She asks me and I shrug.

“I don’t know. I don’t want to say that it means that I’m gay, but it does mean that I… I…”

“You love him. I know that. I’ve always known that.”

“What?” I ask her surprised and she chuckles.

“As kids, you two were inseparable and very protective of each other. Then as you grew, neither of your relationships lasted more than a few months, and when a relationship would end, you two would look happier than ever. I never understood why that was then, but I do now.”

I shake my head.

“Mom I’m not…”

He holds her hand up, stopping me.

“I’m not saying you’re gay, or bisexual or whatever…”

“Thanks.”

“Yet. But as time goes on eventually you will realize that *deep breath* maybe you are.”

I blink as I stare into outer space. Am I gay or bi? There’s nothing wrong with being gay, but I never thought I would be… Maybe I just ignored it very well, all my life.

“Don’t overthink it, Levi. Sometimes your mind is your worst enemy.”

“Then what should I do?”

“Get a haircut.”

I scrunch my eyebrows at her.

“A haircut?”

“Yeah, haircuts are good when you want to start fresh in life. Experience a new chapter and what not. Also, your hair is getting really long.” She says as she flicks a black curl out of my eyes.

I think about it for a while.

“Okay then. I’ll go to the salon and get it cut. Meanwhile, you are going to invite your girlfriend over for dinner sometime so that I can finally meet her.” I tell mom and she giggles.

“I’m nothing hiding her or anything, I just wanted to get to know her more before I introduced you to her. And she’s not my girlfriend… yet.”

“So you’ll invite her to dinner?”

She shrugs.

“I don’t know. Maybe, next week. Now go.”

***

At the salon, I get a text message as I wait for the barber to finish with a customer. It’s from Alice. Shit!

Alice: [Hey handsome, I was just thinking of you.]

I have to stop this before I hurt this sweet girl’s heart.

Levi: [Alice, I have something to tell you.]

Alice: [Oh no, you’re in a relationship aren’t you?]

Levi: [Not quite, but as of recently I realized I have feelings for my best friend.]

There. Ripped it off just like a bandaid. I’ve never been the type to beat around the bush, at least not for certain things.

Alice: [Oh…]

Levi: [I’m sorry, but I’ve been hurt before, by someone telling me they want to be with me and not meaning it. I don’t want to hurt you. You are a great girl and you deserve better.]

Alice: [But that’s what they all say.]

Levi: [I find it hard to believe you’ll never find that guy of your dreams Alice, but now I’ve at least made it clear that I’m not that guy.]

Alice: [Okay, I forgive you, and I wish you the best.]

Levi: [You as well.]

“Levi, your up next son.” The barber says patting the chair as he cleans his tools.

“What kind of hair cut do you want?”

I look over the haircuts on his portfolio and point to the one with the sides of the head buzzed and the top of it is a bit longer.

“Good choice.”